missypie

Here's the latest rule the high school choir teacher made regarding what the kids can wear in Italy: No tennis or athletic shoes! Mind you, they leave in 6 days. They are supposed to go out and buy "comfortable walking shoes" that are not athletic shoes. My son is a junior, so he is wisely ignoring this advice. My daughter, the freshman, thinks she now has to leave her broken in black converse at home and buy new shoes this weekend. I told her I'd take her to the SAS Outlet for "old lady" shoes.

So, a choir full of kids walking around in new shoes. Why does the choir teacher think that Italy cares whether my daughter wears black Converse or "walking shoes"?

One last rant: All the materials are full of "pack light" advice, and there are severe luggage restrictions. They have to pack performance attire (my son's size 13 dress shoes take up half the suitcase). But now they're being told to "dress up" (as in dresses for girls) for their last night's dinner. They are to pack light, but yet are now required to bring an outfit they will only wear once.

ira

Hi M,

>They are to pack light, but yet are now required to bring an outfit they will only wear once.

Wear the dress up clothes on the plane?

Linda431

The athletic shoe "rule", I would just ignore and let them wear what they know they won't get blisters with.

Packing light and dressing up are doable. Your daughter can take a lightweight dress and a pair of ballet flats that are all the rage now.

Your son's dress shoes are a problem, but he would still want more than the one pair he wears on the plane, right? So I would fudge the dress shoe issue and make the second pair black, even if they're not the proper "dress shoe".

I know you were just ranting, and very justifiably so. It's always a challange to fit a group's luggage on buses etc and still have clothes for performances, etc. But you're a mom, right? You can do it! ;-)

Grcxx3

Is there a "reason" for this new rule?????

I'm with you - the thought of "breaking in" brand new shoes while touring around Rome is just painful!!!!!

My son is leaving on Monday night for a Model UN conference in Beijing. They have strict "business" attire for the conference and the conference dinner, but have been given no other "rules" other than - be prepared for any weather, and have comfortable and sturdy shoes for the trip to the Great Wall.

I think the choir teacher needs to take a "chill pill!"

highflyer

Wear whatever shoes they wish. This is nonsense! What's the teacher going to do? If he/she even notices which is unlikely with the amount of stuff they'll be doing then they're certainly not going to make them walk barefoot. If the teacher takes issue then the kids blame their parents and when they return you write a polite letter stating your reasons for the lack of 'proper shoes'.

A dress is pretty light and maybe your daughter can rewear it over jeans. The big shoes, hmm, at least you can fit his spare socks inside them!

missypie

The big shoes are a must-they're part of the performance attire (along with a full tuxedo). I've told my daughter that whatever dress she brings has to go with her performnce shoes (black, closed toe.) I know that that they won't be shipped home if they don't follow these rules, and my son know this, but freshman little sis wants to do the rules. I think she secretly thinks she's going to get a cute pair of new shoes out of this....wait til she sees the "comfortable walking shoes."

Viajero2

Does this rule applies to performing clothing or does it includes their leisure time as well? "No tennis or athletic shoes" does not mean anything without specifying the situation conditions...

missypie

It applies to their non-performance attire. They have to bring black dress closed toe shoes for performance.

This is a circumstance where one can really tell the difference between boys and girls. The same rules/guidance must be being passed on to my son and his (male) friends, but it goes in one ear and out the other-100% of them wear some kind of athletic shoes every day, and there's no way they are wearing anything else. The girls, on the other hand...

jelane

I am always stuffing things in my shoes, he should be able to pack lots with the size....Tell those kids to have a good time, at the end of the day, they will be happy and so should you......I will guarantee that you will be better tomorrow.

travelfan1

Has anyone thought to say to the teacher buying shoes now is not a good idea...that the kids will be much better with broken in shoes? Is this the teacher's first trip abroad...if not, it's hard to believe the rules?

alecksonajetplane

This is the same choir director that didn't want them to stick out, yes?

I don't know about the rest of the Fodorites...but I think a fourteen year old wearing one of those "walking shoes" would probably look a little odd.

I say definitely show your daughter what the walking shoes look like. I'm twenty years old, and I just can't seem to fathom myself wearing them (no offense meant to anyone who prefers them). I realise that they are apparently comfortable, but if it's comfort I'm going for, I think I'd rather go with my good ol' Converse.

missypie

I really don't think that HE thinks he's requiring anything unusual. Think of what typical high school teacher attire is - comfortable slacks (but not jeans); shirt with collar; comfortable shoes (but not athletic shoes). He will be packing what he wears to school every day; it's just that the kids don't own those type of clothes!

Dukey

Is there a reason you haven't told us about your conversation with the choir teacher about all of this?

Tulips

If she wears black Converse she'll fit right in with the locals. No Italian child wears comfortable walking shoes.
I live in Belgium, not Italy, but my teenage daughters wear Converse, Pumas, Uggs, and when they have to be more formal, ballet flat shoes or boots with a short dress.

As long as we're talking about shoes and teenagers; mine now want the Nikes that they can design themselves, but they're 130 euros when I order them here. 110 dollars when ordered in the US, but I can't do that since I don't have a US billing address. My European children want American clothes and shoes (Abercrombie and Fitch and Nike preferably).

Missypie, hope your kids have a great time in Italy, and do let them wear jeans and Converse.

suze

No one in their right mind wears brand new shoes on a trip to Europe.

I'm guessing he assumes they already have them. Not that "they are supposed to go out and buy..."

Take the Converse. Wearing the dress shoes/clothes on the plane is a possibility, I guess.

Christina

I don't know, I think maybe you are making too much of this thing and are also biased about how wonderful it is that kids will only wear tennis shoes and about how walking shoes are ugly and for old ladies. There are plenty of walking shoes that are not sold by SAS (a brand which does, actually, have some youthful styles, even if they have ones older ladies wear, also) and that are attractive.

I think she is just trying to make a good impression and wants to set some rules. My nephew's high school teacher who was taking a group to Wash DC for some week's vacation also set a rule that they were not allowed to wear baseball caps or something very casual, I forget, when they were touring around, and I said that of course young kids wear those in DC. But the teacher was just trying to have the kids look nice, it wasn't the end of the world, either way.

It isn't that hard to dress up for one dinner, all you have to wear is a skirt with some top you are wearing with other things. One thing skirt (if this is warm weather) doesn't take up hardly any room.

Personally, I appreciate the choir director trying to make this kids have some sense of sensibility and manners. I get sick of teenage kids who dress like absolute slobs all the time and don't know how to behave or how to dress like an adult.

CarolA

Having lead a tour group.... I have one thing to say to defend missypie.

MAKE THE RULES KNOWN EARLY!

SIX days before you leave is NOT when you make these rules known. If the teacher wanted them to dress a certain way that should have come up MUCH earlier then this.

If you (the leader) wander around doing stupid things like this it costs you in the long run.

By now every rule/dress code/etc should have been at the home for a few months not a few days...

Failure to plan on the teacher's part should NOT be a crisis on the kids or parents part!

alecksonajetplane

>I get sick of teenage kids who dress like absolute slobs all the time and don't know how to behave or how to dress like an adult.<

But, see, that's the thing though. They're NOT adults. You can't expect a fourteen year old to dress up like a twenty five year old. Nor can you expect them to behave like adults. That doesn't mean that teenagers shouldn't be held accountable for their actions, however. But please...let's all try to remember that we were all fourteen years old at one point.

While I may not be officially a teenager anymore (buh!), I am going to have to politely defend the many teenagers all over who showers and wears clean clothes that fit. As someone who has only departed her "teen" years a few days ago...please...know that teenagers aren't all slobs.

On another note, I used to go on choir trips every year with my school. Yes, we were required to wear a certain uniform and type of shoes (we even bought out stockings in bulk to ensure that we all matched ), we certainly were never forced to wear anything out of the ordinary when we were touring or had free time. The only restriction I can remember us having was not wearing anything entirely too revealing, and that our "touring" shoes needs to be "comfortable."

That's why this whole shoe debacle is so strange to me :/.

scdreamer

Sketchers or slip-on Vans might be good choices.

kybourbon

I think all the parents should send an excuse note just like you did when they needed to be excused from PE. Pack the tennies, take the child to airport, hand teacher note at departure area stating "Please excuse my DD/DS from the no tennies rule. My child must wear tennies for arch support and after paying for this trip I really couldn't afford any custom walking shoes (draw smiley face here). I knew you would understand and not want to cause permanent damage to DD or DS feet. Thank you, signed X." Have all parents do the exact same note at the same time. Mutiny is a nice start to a trip!