We are thinking of bareboating in the British Virgin Islands and taking our 2-year-old son. I am a bit worried about a toddler on a sailboat for 7 days. Anyone out there have experience taking a toddler on a sailing trip? Any advice would be appreciated.

Have you taken your son day-sailing? Do you have any sense of how he'll take to the seas? That's a good starting point.

In terms of longer trips, I would suggest you pose your question on the BVI board of www.traveltalkonline.com -- the sailors there have done it all!

You might want to think about getting a captain for your trip. Keeping an eye on your toddler will probably keep you busy much of the time, which could leave your skipper shorthanded while changing sails, docking, mooring, anchoring.

While I don't have kids of my own, I have taken a lot of little ones out on our boat for daysails. One ironclad rule we have is that they MUST wear a life jacket at all times from dock to deck. I've also discovered that, despite the conventional wisdom that little ones don't get seasick, they DO -- they just can't express themselves well enough to tell you what they're feeling. That is, until someone has to change all their clothes... We've found that a children's antihistamine (e.g. Benadryl -- but check with your own doctor if seasickness might be a concern; don't take my word for it), combined with keeping their eyes/brains occupied and a steady diet of light snacks can avoid mal de mer.

My DD is two and I would never consider doing that at that age. I sailed a lot when I was very little and I am not sure why my parents ever took me! First I would be terrified of drowning. Second, what if he is seasick? Or just feels bad during the trip. Don't get me wrong chartering in the BVIs is one of the best trips ever, IMO but I would not do it with a small child. We are considering doing it when she is older, maybe 7 or so. Not to mention it is the age when they can sneak out, my DD can get out of her bedroom, can you imagine on a boat? I don't think I would be able to sleep for fear she would be out an about.

I have taken my grandson day sailing as a two and three year old. He loved it. I would certainly recommend a good harness/pfd/tether for the child and insist on its use anytime you are sailing. The PFD should be on anytime the child is on the boat in open water when moored/anchored/docked etc. It only takes a second to lose track of a child. Other than that if your son enjoys the water I would take him. I wish I had started sailing at the age of two instead of 22. Enjoy.

Could you ever RELAX with a 2 year old on board?

I've done 12 Caribbean bareboat charters, including 6 in the BVIs. My wife and I owned a 31 foot sailboat that we sold as soon as we learned that my wife was pregnant four years ago. There is NO WAY I would even attempt to take a two year old on a charter. Way too much could go wrong. What if you have 4 days straight of 30 knot winds? What if it rains for two days straight? What if you get a sudden squall with 50 knot winds? What if something like a steering cable breaks and you have to suddenly rig the emergency tiller? What if the engine dies while you are anchoring in a crowded harbor? What if a line suddenly comes loose and whips through the cockpit? What if a north swell rolls into Cane Garden Bay and people are capsizing in their dinghies trying to get ashore? What if your anchor drags in the middle of the night? What if another boats rams into you while you are anchored? All of these things happened to me on charters. There is a huge difference between a few hour daysail and a week long trip on a boat. While it is theoretically possible to keep an eye on a toddler on a boat during every waking moment, what do you plan to do when you want to sleep? Think about how careful you have had to be to make your home "child-safe." I can assure you that a sailboat has infinitely more opportunity for your child to get into trouble than your home. Our kids (triplets, now three) have been climbing everything that they see since before they could walk. It would be very easy to picture them climbing out of the cabin and falling overboard while we slept (assuming we could even fall asleep because of that vision in our heads). Keep him in a harness in bed? Only if you won't worry that he will roll over and wrap it around his neck and choke himself. I've been around boats all my life and sailing is one of my favorite pasttimes. However, I realize that safety at sea is something that you have to think about 24 hours a day, seven days a week while you are on a boat. I thoroughly enjoyed every charter that I did. However, as the person responsible for the boat and the safety of the people sailing with me, there was always a certain level of stress that I felt the entire time. At the end of every trip, I always breathed a sigh of relief that none of the adults on the boat got hurt. Think about the stress that you will feel worrying about a baby. Add to that the fact that you have no idea how your child will react to being on a boat. We took our kids for their first boat ride this past summer. Two of them loved it and have talked about it ever since. The other one was terrified the entire time. Strangely enough, the one who was most afraid on the boat was the one who is least afraid when it comes to swimming in the ocean. My advice? Wait until your child is about 7 or 8, has learned about boating safety, knows how to swim, etc., etc. before attempting a charter.

Our little one is three and enjoys sailing (as much as a 3 year old can enjoy sailing.) It's all about your frame of mind and expectations. We go to Charleston for the weekends and sail on a 41 Hunter which is quite roomy. We've spent the last summer practicing docking in close quarters and working the running rigging and having fun. If we get to sail an hour or two, then we've had a great day. When our little one starts to get grumpy while in the cockpit we turn on the motor and break out the bubbles. Our BVI bareboat trips are really about familly and having fun not about sailing only. Sometimes when she's tired from a morning of activities she'll take a long nap down below or watch a DVD while we enjoy a nice sail. We attribute some of our success to planning and packing--DVD's, snacks, Polly Pocket toys, markers, and all sorts of bubble blowers.

We have friends who strap their toddler into a carseat (secured to the cockpit) while docking or during situations where the little one needs to be confined--opinions vary on that one. I personally think it's a good idea especially during times when you need to know your child is secure.

If you have concerns or haven't sailed with your child, I'd consider getting a crewed charter for your first BVI experience. We've only been sailing for a year and have very strict rules for our 3 year old.

Taking little ones sailing is a very personal decision and varies according to your child. We happen to think it's the best thing we've ever done! Please feel free to email me directly for more specifics: [email protected]

We have a 3 year old and we often take her with us on motorboats for short daytrips. It is heavily dependent upon the child. She's naturally on the cautious side and has been raised to know the rules of the boat. Now that she's almost 4 and capable of even more self control, I'm thinking a daytrip on a sailboat will soon happen. I know many people who have raised kids or were raised themselves on sailboats and it's hard work. They have endless stories of near catastrophies. Perhaps it's not the best idea for a "vacation."