Here's how we solved door slamming. First time slamming the door, verbal reminder about proper door handling, second slam, door removed from hinges for couple of weeks- no third door slamming 5 years later.

Giveem and Rita,

(and all you other happy-smacking parents out there) . . . I remember getting my hand smacked with a plastic comb once or twice, once with a belt on my behind, and once in elementary school with a wooden paddle. Probably just 2 or 3 whacks each time, but those 3 or 4 spankings did the trick for me, at least until high school

I don't know that a physical impact is absolutely required for good discipline, but it certainly made an impression on me (sorry, couldn't resist). In any event, I don't have kids. But if I did, I would hope to have the good sense to practice parenting the way that Giveem and Rita do.

P.S. Giveem, I probably should have said something to the parents of the kid in the restaurant that was playing drums on my head. Both you and Rita offered the good insight that the parents might not have known what was going on. However, I have been a little gun-shy since trying to shush a group of more-senior citizens at a movie once--boy did they raise a stink, even though I was as polite and non-confrontational as I could be.

Oh those wild and crazy Q-tips! You can't take them anywhere!

These examples... Just another use for duct tape.

Chuck-Kids need limits and discipline, parents today don't have a clue how to do either and IMHO, time-outs don't work! As to kids being comfortable with parents, I think that comes from parents letting their kids friends address them by their first names. I have taught my kids that when you address an adult not related to you it is Mr./Mrs./Ms. so and so and first names are disrespectful. The other problem is the media. Kids spend an inordinate time watching television nowdays and are exposed to violence, foul language, rudeness etc. I took my daughter to a festival last week and I was shocked and appalled at the 5 and 6 year old girls dressed like Brittany Speers, belly button showing, skimpy clothes, makeup etc. Kids today are targeted by advertisers and are being forced to become little adults before they are ready.

As to behavior in restaurants, I agree with the above poster, take them to MacDonald's or some other kid friendly place and teach them manners. IMO, kids should not be allowed in a nice restuarant until they can sit still, behave and not whine. Until then, leave them with a sitter or go to a kid friendly place.

do you know that some of the trendiest restaurants (read expensive) now have childrens' menus. They are therefore child friendly by definition. However, taking anyone (epecially children whose palates are just developing) to McDonalds is cruel and should be outlawed.

canyouread,thanks for the reply, you never know, somewhere, someplace, we may be dining at the same place at the sametime.

As a person with children, & knowing how try to bring them up & teach them values, respect, & responsibility, I still can get annoyed once in awhile by other's kids who appear to not have those values, but then I also think, those are the kids that will eventually be running our country, inventing an alternative to oil, paying our social security, & just being the general workers of our world, basically the future. Is there hope?
Also, for every family with kids that mis-behave in a restaurant, how many families are there with kids that know how to act, or how many parents are there without the kids? Probably more families that behave than not. I sympathize with being disturbed, annoyed, or whatever you want to call it by either obnoxious adults, or misbehaving children. They are probably(hopefully) still in the minority & don't lump all of us parents & children as being problems.

Just wanted to point out that there are some great restaurants between McDonald's and Chez Steakhouse.

When we are on vacation (to get back to travel), we can't get a babysitter. We've found some of the best places are the local seafood houses (we usually vacation at the beach). Food is great, kids are welcome. I think most of them started as bars that served food - they still have the bar, it's fairly loud, you can usually eat outside.

At home, we do get a babysitter for some restaurants. But there are some great places that you can take kids other than fast food. Which gets back to my previous post - you can't expect kids to behave once in a blue moon. You have to take them out on a regular basis and expect them to behave no matter where you are.

Buttercup,
I like your way of thinking & acting on this subject.

Buttercup, you're so right! The only way they'll learn is by doing. Of course that puts the responsibility right back on us as the parent. Encourage good behavior. Correct bad behavior. And remember to set up the situation so that proper behavior on their part is much easier.

Buttercup-I agree with you. Some of the chain restaurants such as Max&Ermas, Applebees etc. are great places to take your kids. BUT, the key is to take them early, around 4-6pm, before they get too tired. Kids tend to get cranky and unruly when they are tired and the later you go the worse their behavior. IMO, any adult that takes a kid to a restaurant at 9pm should be horsewhipped! Kids should be at home or in bed at that hour, not in a restaurant.

Wow Gina, horsewhipped? Yikes! Personally I can't stand the food in the restaurants you emtioned, most are prepared ahead frozen and reheated in a microwave or oven. Ask any waiter which meals are prepared on site. Bet you'd be surprised. Also these restaurants are overstimulating to all parties not just kids and parents don't use these restaurants to teach their kids to respect other diners because it's already loud and has a "family" atmosphere. I find those family style restaurants just too annoying. I do not however think that children should be allowed to misbehave in any restaurant. I don't understand why parents take children to high end restaurants where there could really be no menu choices for kids and how in the world can adults enjoy their own meal. That's the part I don't get.

Any parent that takes their kids to an expensive restaurant that late at night lacks common sense and should be hung! If more people spoke up to bad parenting, maybe these moronic parents would get a clue! Instead, people turn their heads and whisper behind their back or vent here which doesn't do any good. Last week in Church their was this couple with kids in back of me making all kinds of rukus and I politely turned around and told them to please be quiet so I could hear the service. Problem is people are afraid to speak up.

NoSpam-There is nothing wrong with the above mentioned restaurants to take kids to, so quit being such a snob. IMO, it is rude to take kid's to a nice, expensive restaurant until they are older and can behave. Why subject other diners to unruly children??? These people deserve to eat in peace!

Gina-I agree with you about taking kids out early, unfortunately you see stupid parents out at 9/10 or later with kids in tow. The kids are so cranky, they can't even see straight and the parents sit there oblivious to the little darlings. Too bad we can't require parents to take parenting classes. Too many don't have a clue how to raise their kids...

Ok while George and Gina horsewhip and then hang any parent who keeps a child out late and relegate the rest of families to restaurants like Applebees maybe we can all agree that the parents here at Fodors have well-behaved children who can be taken out without disturbing other diners. Maybe it's our love of travel and food that motivates us to raise our children to be respectful of other travelers and diners.

nospam-YOU are full of crap! Do you ever listen to yourself??? I am sure Gina and George were not talking literally about hanging and horsewhipping parents although I have seen my share of stupid parents. IMO, you have way too high an opinion of yourself, are arrogant and a snob to boot! Are you sure you are not Oaktown in disguise?? Your prattling sounds just like something that airheaded, snob would say.

So because I don't like food in certain restaurants I am a snob? Is that correct? Or are there other things that make me a snob? Let's see I don't advocate violence for parents who raise their children different from me, so that makes me a snob? And like oaktown traveller, well you've cut me to the quick and I'm taking my ball and going home. Guy x you're always so mean.

Nospam, ignore the horsewhip wielding trailer trash that frequents this website. The welfare people are knocking on their doors right now to take their children out of an abusive home environment. You are 100% correct. Applebees and the like are nauseating. But then what can you expect from people who beat their own children and threaten to horsewhip and hang parents who happen to disagree with them.

By the way, has anyone noticed that Eric posted this inflamatory subject and then was never heard from again. Can we say TROLL?

i don't think eric's necessarily a troll. i mean, he just wanted to vent. isn't the purpose of venting to get something out of your system and then move on?

While I'm not totally opposed to Applebee's and the like, they are not really what I was referring to when I said there are other restaurants between fast food and fine dining.

I don't think the restaurant necessarily has to market itself as family-oriented to be good for kids. We've had great luck locally with smaller ethnic places, as well as some smaller, family-run, more traditional American-fare places.

I'll probably get slammed for this, but one of our favorite places is a local bar that serves lunch in a room (it's really too small to be called a restaurant) in the back. Ours are not usually the only kids there, the burgers are better than any fast food, and my older daughter loves that she is a "regular", with the waiter greeting her by name.