What's with this!

On a trip to San Francisco, I had a connection. Unfortunately, I was assigned a middle seat for the five hour flight to SFO. When I got to my seat, the row was empty, so I sat in the aisle seat, to get myself out of the aisle, ready to hop up when the person with the window seat arrived.

While waiting, in the aisle across the way, there was a couple who had settled into an aisle (husband) and a window (wife) seat. When an elderly lady came along with the center seat, the man asked if she'd like the window seat. She said, "No thank you." He said, "Well, we want to sit together." She said, "Dear, you should have booked seats together." He said, "Are you sure you wouldn't like the window seat?" She said, "NO, THANK YOU". Then he said, "How about the aisle." She said, "GREAT! I'd love that."

I thought this all quite unusual until:

A few moments later, a man leaned over and bellowed in my ear, "YOU'RE IN MY SEAT LADY!" I started to explain... The lady with him said, "You can have the window seat." I said, "No thank you, my seat is the center seat". (Taking a cue from the lady across the way, who was eyeing me most sympathetically.) The fellow says, "Well, we want to sit together so go ahead and take the window seat." I repeated, "No, Thank You." After much pleading on their part and more polite refusals on mine, the fellow fell into the aisle seat and proceeded to arrange himself and his belongings. All the while blocking his wife and myself are blocking the aisle. Finally, the wife says, "Jack, you'll have to get out so we can get in." He says, "Damn it, why don't you just get in the damned window seat!" ("No, Thank You.") Finally, he gets up and allows his wife in, then me, then plops back down.

After this, the wife takes her pillow and blanket, turns toward the window, goes to sleep. Her considerable rear end having shoved my knees, then feet, aside. But, not for long. "KAREN. You got that newspaper?" "KAREN. Where's the water?" On and on. He leans over and shouts to me, "Well, you wouldn't have to put up with this if you just took the damned window seat." (And, so far, I had resisted the urge to say a word or even give him a look.)

During the meal, they passed things back and forth and leaned over my tray all the while.

When the movie started, he put on his headset and made loud comments throughout. Actually, you would have sworn he had Turret's (please excuse). Every so often there was a loud "HA!" or "IDIOT!" or "DAMNED FOOL" and "STUPID, STUPID, STUPID". (No idea in response to what, I was reading a book, or trying to.) Each outburst - half a dozen folks turned around with "the look".

Then, he dumped his Sprite all over me, when he pounded his tray with "SEE THERE!". That stuff is sticky! All down my slacks and all over my feet and sandals. Then, headed for the back of the plane (I thought for another Sprite). I hit the rest room, rinsed off as well as possible. He did return after a while with a huge wad of paper towels for me (not that this would have helped any). And, was, thankfully, a bit more quiet for the rest of the flight. When they announced we'd be landing soon, he actually leaned over and apologized about the Sprite. He actually seemed sincere. AND, he was most gracious the several times I got out for the rest room. And, then he stepped aside and allowed me to leave before gathering their belongings from the overhead.

My husband prefers the window seat. He likes to look out and lean against the side to sleep. He books window seats, whenever possible, when traveling alone. When we travel together, I prefer the aisle seat, so he is okay with a middle seat in a three-seat aisle. A wonderful husband he is.

Is it common for a couple to deliberately book the aisle and window, hoping the "middle" person will take the window? I've never encountered this before, so was quite astonished to experience this twice in the same aisle!

There was NO WAY I was going to take the window seat (which is my least desirable) so that they could sit together.

This couple seemed to think it was odd that I refused, when I believed it quite inconsiderate of them to ask. Had it not happened to the lady across the way a few moments earlier, I'd have been caught quite off guard and probably would have complied, and been miserable the entire flight.

We've never thought to deliberately book and aisle and window hoping the center will go empty. But, even if we did (and we do prefer to sit together and would never be inconsiderate to the person in the center), both of us agree that we, having "set it up", would give the middle person the seat of their choice if we wished to sit together.

I don't know what those weirdos were up to, but the bottom line is that you have every right to sit in the seat you booked and others are out of place for suggesting otherwise.

Hi djkbooks, this situation of a couple booking a window seat and an aisle seat goes way back decades when planes were not as crammed with passengers as they are now. The thinking was that noone would be in the middle seat and thus the couple would have the middle seat vacant for the conveience. And that often happened.

Guess a lot of travellers are not clued in that on most planes all the seats are taken and consequently if they truly want to sit together they need to book two seats together. Either window and middle or aisle and middle.

What a horrible experience for you!!
BTW, I always book the aisle seat. If someone is travelling with me then we book the middle seat also. We can change seats during the flight if we want to. Ah, the joys of flying!

That is such a rude and very tight wadish thing to do. If we are not flying first I buy 3 seats so we have more room without disturbing anyone.

Loved your story! My husband prefers the aisle, while I prefer the window. This just recently was an issue somewhat like yours, where a travel agent, noting our preferences, sat him on the aisle and me at the window, when there was a seat between us. My husband is willing to take the center seat, and so I changed our seats upon viewing them online. Didn't want to assume that center seat would go unassigned.

OK, I'll admit that we often book the aisle and window in the thoughts that the center will go empty. But we always offer the center seat person a choice if they'd want the aisle or window seat instead, and I've never yet seen any of them say "no, I WANT the cramped between two people center seat".

I guess my question is how did two different people who actually PREFER being wedged between two other people instead of a window or aisle seat manage to get on the same plane?

But the bottom line is, we always thought we were being polite in offering the person with the center seat a "better seat". We'd certainly prefer keeping our aisle and window seats instead of either of us being wedged in the middle. We have never run into someone like you who actually prefers a center seat. We don't!

djkbooks, I'm sorry for your trouble, but why didn't you just ask the husband for the aisle seat instead? Am I missing something here?

A group of girlfriends and I went on a trip, and two of the gals had the aisle and window seats. When the "middle" person arrived, they offered her her choice: aisle or window. She refused! She actually spent the whole flight in the middle. And we were partying, so you can imagine what this person had to deal with (no martinis dumped on her though!). Did you refuse the aisle seat, or just never ask the guy "hey buddy why don't you switch with me so you can be near your lovely wife"?

Patrick and joan you seem to be missing the point of the story. Djkbooks said at the beginning that she was "unfortunately" assigned a middle seat. She didn't want it, but was enjoying being mean and nasty to the other people, taking her cue from the other woman being equally nasty across the aisle. Why is being so rude so interesting? You'd rather be uncomfortable than give in to logic and common sense and courtesy?

No way was the elderly woman being nasty. Very polite from the story I read.

CalgirlSusan:

Sounds like you're the one being mean and nasty. Didn't get that from djkbooks posting...only yours

dkj wasn't being nasty. She/he was simply responding to the attitude of the guy that yelled at her to get out of HIS seat. I agree with LoveItaly that "back in the day" people often did this with the hope/expectation that there would be no middle person and they could spread out. At no time did the man ask if she wanted the aisle seat. They gave DJK one option. I might have said, if you want to sit together, I'll trade the aisle seat. Then, if they said no, I would have stuck to the middle -- maybe.

I have to say, when I was a kid and a young adult, I HAD to have the window seat! Once you hit middle age, the quickest route to the toilets becomes KEY! I LOVE the aisle seat now.

highbay, I must have missed the part where djkbooks offered to let the husband and wife sit together. She seems to have been delighted to keep them apart as if it were some sort of punishment to them, even though they offered her another seat.

I apologize for not realizing that the elderly woman did take the aisle seat when it was offered to her.

CalgirlSusan:

They only offered the window seat...she was in the aisle seat...so booo to them for not offering the seat they found her in. I find NO fault in her post.

Somewhere in this poorly told tale there's probably a kernel of truth. But, please, edit edit edit. Have you tried Reader's Digest? They'll publish almost anything.

Well, gee, Patrick, I may understand this way better now, since you say

"But the bottom line is, we always thought we were being polite in offering the person with the center seat a "better seat". We'd certainly prefer keeping our aisle and window seats instead of either of us being wedged in the middle." And, we have never run into someone like you who actually prefers a center seat. We don't!"

Well, heck, I don't either, as I carefully explained. I PREFER the aisle seat. Better is the middle. Worst is the window in a three seat aisle. Please pay attention before responding.

That you admit that you often book the aisle and window and "do not wish to be wedged in the middle" explains everything. Thank you.

A seat is a seat, and, even in the middle, no one should be WEDGED IN, for heavens sake.

You SAY you'd "prefer keeping our aisle and window seat" versus either of YOU being "wedged in the middle".

I NEVER said I "preferred" a middle seat, which I definitely DO NOT. That's what I was stuck with - BECAUSE this couple had deliberately selected aisle and window, hoping if the seat was booked the occupant (me) would agree to move.

I did maintain that I'd prefer the aisle to the window seat, should some presupposing "couple" wish for the entire row.

For sure, no one would wish to "WANT to be cramped between two people". And, this should, surely, not be the result, unless the COUPLE in question, hoping for an empty seat in between, makes it SEEM so!

Ooops. Retracting suggestion for publication. OP is a wingnut.