Hi! I am following up on a couple other posts on topics relating to this. I am getting married next May(2007) in Italy. This is my first trip to Italy(motherjudy has already advised me on the folly of this), and our family and friends(15-20) have decided to accompany us.I really want to stay in tuscany and would happily choose val d'orcia or cortona but these are issues preventing that.
1. We will be renting a car but no one else will(lazy and not adventurous).
2. The guests are the kind who will play it safe and are happier being tourists(not travelers).
3. They(most probably)will get tired of the countryside.
4. Hence I figured being close to Florence might allow them to plan day trips.
5. Based on my previous posts it looks like the Chianti region is the most optimal.
6. Based on scary group reports and personal experience with said people, I am worried that I will have to plan daily trips for everybody.

SO these are my questions:
1.Does anybody know of villas or agriturismos close to a train station? This way I will only have to arrange for transportation to the train station(for trips to florence).
2. What do you suggest I do regarding trips into the countryside?Hire a tour service? I don't want to pay for this since I will be driving myself, but am not looking forward to collecting money from guests.
3. How do I get out of playing tour organiser?I will be asking everybody to plan their own days(!!!!).
4. Should I make it easier by renting a place in florence(I don't want to). This way they can take public transportation everywhere.
5. the only solution I have found is to plan a trip everyday(1 week's worth)for the group that they can sign up for. those who don't are assumed to be planning trips on their own.

I really would appreciate help from anybody who has had similar experiences.

Thanks,
Susan

PLEASE just have a small wedding in a pretty chapel close to home, then head off to Tuscany for the honeymoon of your dreams. Planning a wedding and a honeymoon AND serving as tour director for a party of 20 will put you far over the edge.

suetibu, IMHO, you are over extending yourself. This is your wedding where you get to concentrate on you and your new hubby - not everyone else that decides to go to your wedding. I would think that they (those accompanying you) could understand that. Can't you simply ask them to make their own plans? I really don't think that they will think less of you for doing so. It IS your wedding, after all.

I would think that the reason you chose Tuscany if because of the romantic, magical spect to having a wedding there. I can foresee it being exactly the opposite if you end up acting tour guide for everyone else....

Good luck in whatever you decide and congratulations on your upcoming nuptuals.

Are you planning a vacation or a wedding? (It's a little hard to tell.)


Sorry, but the whole thing sounds like a nightmare to me. Have a sweet little wedding at home, kiss everyone goodbye, and have a GREAT, ROMANTIC, RELAXING trip with your new husband.

I was married in June 2004 and we honeymooned in Italy. I really recommend you rethink your current plans. Planning a wedding is incredibly time-consuming and there are MANY extra hoops to jump through to marry legally in a foreign country. Tack that onto acting as a tour director when you yourself have never even been to Italy... recipe for disaster.
I'm truly not trying to be a negative influence but please do be aware of how stressful this is going to be if you proceed. You may end up wanting to elope to France by the time your Italian wedding comes around ;-)

Susan,

We are getting married this Sept. in the US and then heading to Italy for our honeymoon. We thought about a destination wedding but like many realized that it is not always as easy as one would think. If you TRULY want to get married in Tuscany. I say go for it but have someone else be the "trip organizer" All you have to do is figure out where the two of you want to get married and honeymoon and ENJOY!

There was a poster that planned her Florence wedding on Fodor's a few years ago. Here is a link to her wedding pictures and information about her wedding planner.
http://www.fodors.com/forums/threads...p;tid=34549513

sue,

DD's wedding in Venice in 2003 was simply beautiful.....and I can't imagine what it would have been like without the use of a wedding planner...they made everything happen for us...all the questions you have will be part of planning the wedding for them...they have the facility to do it all.....and to allow you to enjoy it all while they do the work!! There was no question they couldn't answer and nothing they wouldn't handle...if they didn't know the answer, they researched it for us....the legalities alone make using a planner really necessary....If you talk with someone early on, they will help with the burden of finding the answer to all of this...it will be such a relief to know someone is taking care of it all for you.

Hi! Thanks for the caution. But I really want to spend time with my family in a foreign country. I will definitely be asking everybody to plan their own activities but am concerned that renting a villa in a remote location will make it difficult for them.

Any suggestions?

If you're determined to go ahead with this, I'd say you must do at least one thing: deputize one friend as the "travel agent". Then, lovingly and firmly, tell everybody "Amy's handlng everything. I'm just the bride." Even if you have to find an "Amy" (or a "Brad&quot outside your inner friend/family circle, or agree to pay for all or part of his/her trip, I think having somebody work everything out, drive the little van full of relatives around, make up a little guidebook, all that stuff, and best of all, have someone else be responsible for the travel end makes sense. Then don't backslide.
Also, I think you have to remember that people are ON VACATION. Not everyone wants to work that hard. And it's not everyone's dream to go to Italy and see everything. That's YOUR dream.
(Lord knows I've been dragged off to enough mouldy burgs, where it was the "bride's dream" to be married in her childhood church or something. Once my mom and I spent a whole afternoon at a CVS because that was the ONLY form of "diversion" within 50 miles.)
If, as you say, the goal is to spend time with your family, that takes some down time. I think some compromise is inevitable. I'd say definitely rent a place that people can hang out at: pool, nice grounds, books, not shared with anyone etc.
It also may well be that as the time draws closer, people who were in love with the idea and swear they'll go just never get around to asking for the time off or buying tickets, and you end up with a group of 6 or 8 more sympatico travelers.
Just relax and remember the most important thing: The wedding is one day. The marriage, and the relationships between your familes, is for a lifetime.

Excellent advice from Bluehour. I love the idea of designating someone (preferably someone with experience in Italy) as the group travel liason. You really will have more than enough to worry and stress about with just the wedding details

My guess is you'll actually end up with an EXTREMELY small group of people who will actually follow through and attend. My son is getting married in a week and a half in Lithuania (that's the bride's home country). Initially about 25 people in the US expressed a serious interest in attending. Then as the time approached other commitments came up, airfare had killer prices, the timing justr didn't work out etc. Ends up it will be one friend, the parents & sister and brother-in-law who are actually making the trip.

Hi! Thanks for all the advice. My fiance and I are hoping that most of the people will drop out close to the wedding too. we would love to have just the immediate family,too.

Castello di Montegufoni is a wonderful place for a wedding. They have accomodation, a chapel nearby and large dining room for a reception (we attended a wedding there). The Castle is only 20ks from Florence so guests can stay at the Castle or Florence. The Castle is in Val di Pesa (Chianti) with balcony views to die for. Their website is www.montegufoni.it or contact them through the Posarelli website.

You should definitely get someone experienced to do the organising. There are two recent testimonials for Silvia at La Ghiandaia here http://www.greve-in-chianti.com/wedd...ddings-eng.htm so two were pleased (at the very least)! You can easily rent a minibus with driver for taking your guests around www.sunflower-tours.com

I now have my book in front of me:
Take a look at Villa Saraceno, a 1550 Palladian villa for up to 16 in Finale, Vicenza, offered by the Landmark Trust. (It's a great area, lots to do for day trips, Venice is close.)
They won't let you get married there, but you could do everything else there. A very rough price calculation puts a week in May at under $8,000 for the whole property.
LT also has Sant' Antonio at Tivoli, outside Rome, for 12 people. Parts of that house date to 60 BC. But the bathrooms are modern!
www.landmarktrust.org.uk

I have to agree with DownUnder, Castello di Montegufoni would be a "to die for" location for a wedding! We stayed there 5 years ago, in their "La Grotto" apartment, and it was like something from a dream. There's also a large terrace with gardens where everyone congregates in the evenings, that would be magical for an outdoor wedding. There's a gorgeous pool area, and many terraced levels to just wander around. A public bus stops right in front of the Castle that goes into Florence, although we didn't use it as we had a car. But in hindsight, it would have been easier than parking in Florence! You couldn't go wrong with this place, it's like something out of "Romeo and Julet", and with plenty of varying-sized accomodations. Please take a look.

Susan,

I am a destination wedding coordinator in Italy. I think getting married in Italy is a wonderful idea. I myself was married in Italy a few years ago. One thing I would suggest is to rent a villa for the entire family. This way you can all stay together and it will save your family and friends a lot of money on accomodations.

If you think your family is going to want to do a lot of day trips I would suggest staying close to Siena or Florence.

Thanks!
Kimberley

Anything is possible! I was married in Italy (Siena) last year and it was PERFECT! Getting married in Italy was the best thing we've ever done!

Don't be discouraged - however, you really should remember that this is for YOU two. It's all about you - and so you shouldn't worry about all of your guests, their itineraries, etc. Just do like we did - provide all the wedding activities and leave the rest up to the guests themselves. Most will likely appreciate the flexibility of choosing their own accommodation anyways! (ours did)

Let me know if you have any questions, alright? I'm here to help!!

Cheers,
Crissy

www.sockmonkey75.blogspot.com