traveling with other people....
Mar 20th, 2006, 09:51 AM
#83
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we obviously have different personalities. would only take me a moment to decide to say "gald your coming (sometimes you have to lie to keep family trouce) but i was looking forward to the drive. see you there!" either drive alone or some family members could go with her and some may want to come with you. do not do a caravan type trip because she could still ruin that. just go on your own.
Mar 20th, 2006, 08:58 PM
#84
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Vickib2,
So proud of you. Have a wonderful time with your daughter and whatever the response is, even no response, try to go with just you and your daughter. It's long wonderful road trips that gets you closer to people you love. Cherish those moments and don't allow SIL and her daughter to ruin what could be a wonderful and memorable experience for you and your daughter. I mean let's face it. We don't get chances like these often, to create that wonderful extra layer of bondage between mother and daughter. Don't let it slip your hands....
Have fun and enjoy. Nowadays, there are plenty of rest stops to alleviate some of that car sickness you get.
So proud of you. Have a wonderful time with your daughter and whatever the response is, even no response, try to go with just you and your daughter. It's long wonderful road trips that gets you closer to people you love. Cherish those moments and don't allow SIL and her daughter to ruin what could be a wonderful and memorable experience for you and your daughter. I mean let's face it. We don't get chances like these often, to create that wonderful extra layer of bondage between mother and daughter. Don't let it slip your hands....
Have fun and enjoy. Nowadays, there are plenty of rest stops to alleviate some of that car sickness you get.
May 2nd, 2006, 12:29 PM
#86
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I read this thread for the first time today, and I, too, am curious how the trip turned out.
For the record, I think I'm more like the SIL than the OP. I agree VERY STRONGLY with the poster who said "Try to keep in mind that sometimes it's difficult for an assertive person to understand someone who goes along to get along. SIL may think she's doing you a favor. It can get frustrating when you can't figure out what someone really wants because they won't say so. She might be relieved just to get the plan straightened out."
I've had personal experience with this. I tend to just steamroller along making the decisions I think are best for me, and those around me. BUT...if someone is assertive back...it doesn't bother me in the least.
So if I were your SIL, you could have said "Nope, I'm driving, I think you're daughter is too poor a driver for me to risk my neck with. Feel free to ride with me, but I expect you to make Amber keep her finger to herself, or I'm putting her out at the nearest bus station".
Obviously, I'm exaggerating a bit for effect, but my point is: direct, assertive people like myself are thick-skinned and would be staggered and unhappy to learn you'd been distraught over something so simple as saying "no".
Or, SIL could just be a psycho b***h. In either case, I hope you had a nice trip! ;-)
For the record, I think I'm more like the SIL than the OP. I agree VERY STRONGLY with the poster who said "Try to keep in mind that sometimes it's difficult for an assertive person to understand someone who goes along to get along. SIL may think she's doing you a favor. It can get frustrating when you can't figure out what someone really wants because they won't say so. She might be relieved just to get the plan straightened out."
I've had personal experience with this. I tend to just steamroller along making the decisions I think are best for me, and those around me. BUT...if someone is assertive back...it doesn't bother me in the least.
So if I were your SIL, you could have said "Nope, I'm driving, I think you're daughter is too poor a driver for me to risk my neck with. Feel free to ride with me, but I expect you to make Amber keep her finger to herself, or I'm putting her out at the nearest bus station".
Obviously, I'm exaggerating a bit for effect, but my point is: direct, assertive people like myself are thick-skinned and would be staggered and unhappy to learn you'd been distraught over something so simple as saying "no".
Or, SIL could just be a psycho b***h. In either case, I hope you had a nice trip! ;-)
