NoFanOf

When the airline hostess/flight attendant,whatever said-" We are here to help you and make your flight as wonderful as possible"

Donna F

It happened yesterday. On our return flight, two tags were put on our bags. Heavy and PIT. My travel companion asked if our bags were going into the Pit because they were so heavy.

bj

Question to the summer gondola operator at Vail: "where do they store the moguls in summer??"
This is true...my son was the operator.

Jacque

Along the lines of the poster above. We had recently moved to the mainland from Hawaii and still had the Hawaii plates on our car. Driving from Utah to California we stopped at a gas station. The attendant saw our plates and, I'm not kidding, asked in all seriousness if we had driven the whole way from Hawaii!! We tried not to laugh but just couldn't help it!!

Paul

While in a hotel lobby in Quebec City, I watched an extremely livid American emerge from an elevator and scream to his lady companion - loud enough for everyone in the lobby to hear - "why do these g...damn people insist on speaking French?"

worlds

While swimming in Aruba, we overheard a lady telling her 6 or 7 year old son "don't go underwater, if you swallow the water you could get the malaria."

ME

I was in Kinder, LA about 1.5 hrs west of Baton Rouge. I was talking to the casino dealer (I was on a business trip) and told her I was from Maryland. She asked what language they spoke in MAryland. I anwered, "American".

Sarah

Ok I will join in. I was standing at queen's bath edge in Princeville, Kauai this summer. Truth be told I really did not like the crowd at this swimming hole on this day. Some tatood fathers along with swearing mothers and kids doing splash producing jack knifes (I think this is what we called them as kids). Feeling better than others I refrained from swimming. I was getting warmer in the mid day sun but still feeling superior. My guest who was swimming said are you coming in or should we go? I said loudly as I was speaking to my friend in the distance, " do you think I can just take a quick dump and leave". Everyone looked at me in disgust just as I had been judging them they were judging me.I meant dunk just to cool off. Then someone said please tell me if you are planning on doing this so that I can get out first, everyone roared with laughter. Instant Kharma!! We still laugh about this and I try not to judge.

ick

Sarah,that was quite charming

Shain

Hi Fodorites,
I was on a 10 day "Trek America" through
Arizona, Nevada, southern california.
Our tourguide in the begin told as she were from Florida and did all the tours there many times. Now that she wanted to
change to westcoast and do some trips there. OK so far - than
as we were mostly tourists from overseas, we had a lot of questions about this and that and than she told as
she would have always an idea where the next visitor center was and certainly would stop for wildlife en route. A few
kilometers further she screamed "WILDLIFE" and she seemed quiete seroius about this but this wildliefe turned out a mountaingoat.
Well - for "Floridians" it might be wildlife....
Shain/eu/de/düsseldorf

xxx

yes Shain I am guessing that for some Germans that was English....funny anyway.

Suzy

Shain, where in tarnation are you from, where mountain goats are NOT wildlife?

Debbie

While walking with my friends' two pre-school children in a lovely park in La Jolla, California, we were feeding the squirrels grapes and nuts. The little things are almost tame, and so delicately eat the food from the children's hands. Some Japanese tourist came up to me and told me to make the children stop-- that the squirrels were poisionous! They must have some bad-ass squirrels in Asia, I guess.

xxx

we are just a tad defensive here Shain but thanks for dropping in. Let's not scare him away Suzy nice to have a diverse posting community. I suspect in some parts of Germany mountain goats are as common as squirrels. It is a big deal when I see them in Europe Shain. I am from NYC although I am sure it does not rank with what you may have been hoping for wild Flamingos?

Shain

Hi xx, and suzy,

you are right and I am somehow wrong.
Indeed we expected something like brown bears or pumas or even snakes.
Not goats. I live in very urban area, but 20 minutes outside - well farms, woods, whatever you desire.(cows, goose,-are those wildlife in "that" way too.
And - thank you for advising my bad english. I thought this forum would be a good stage to share experiences and combine it to train further my english.

However I don t want to be look arrogant or whatever you think of, at that time I, no, we (swiss, aussies,
Kiwis, tommies and dutch) found it funny.
Shain/eu/de/düsseldorf

XXX

Shain, stay in touch Shain these little snares always happen but it so nice you dropped in. I do want to see those pumas but I think that is southwest or Rocky Mountain experience if it is even found there.

You painted a pretty picture for us of your home where are you posting from?

John G

This didn't happen to me, but to my mother at the Anne Frank House in Amsterdam: As they were touring the house with a small group, and the tour guide was explaining the history of Anne Frank, her family, and the others who shared the attic, an American woman bust out, "I can't believe all those people lived in this tiny little place! Me, I just couldn't do it. I'd have to go out and find me a bigger apartment." My mother and another woman wanted to push her down the flight of stairs.

Shain

Hi again,
I'm from Düsseldorf/rhine valley close to cologne and the dutch border.
You won't believe me but, I will drive this evening to Geel,
close to antwerp to visit the partents of my girl. So I will return tomorrow.
Wish you a pleasent evening.
To all of you - thank you for your undertsanding.
P.S.: you will find more of my hints on the european section, too.
Shain/E.U./DE/Düsseldorf
Gute nacht (german)
welterusten (dutch)
godd night - well now it's 9:15 pm over here.
C u all tomorrow

xxx

Shain what are "tommies"

sonya

oh my, I'm still laughing at Sarah's remark (1/31 2:06pm). Absolutely hilarious!

Let's hear some more Dumb travel remarks!