Once upon a time in Europe, they used to ask if you'd like a table by yourself or with others, then they'd seat you with other solo diners. I'm not sure if they still do that.

The US is a lot less friendly to strangers. We have a paranoia that others haven't developed. I go alot to Canada, and they are much more willing to interact with strangers. I also think that it depends on where in the States you go - the coasts tend to be "snobby" (I'm from Calif. so I can say that ).

Toed, where in California? I live very near SF and spend a lot of my time in the City. I don't find people particularly unfriendly at all.

I'm currently in the Sac valley, but I'm from Marin County originally. I love SF - it's a great city! And I think it's one of the most friendliest places in Calif. But then, it's also much more European in attitude and atmosphere than the rest of Calif.

Hi JBHapgood, I talk to fellow diners almost everywhere I go -- Europe, Australasia, the US. But as you so astutely mentioned, it may be because I'm clearly foreign (the typical Asian with black hair and black eyes). On the other hand, I have the knack of putting people entirely at ease within seconds of meeting me. Part of that comes from the fact that I'm a correspondent and I need to get the info needed within a short span of time. I have been told frequently that I have a very honest-looking eager-beaver little-girl face ;-) The little-girl part is a bit of a stretch since I'm just a bit short of the 40-mile post. The eager-beaver part I'm trying not to do too much because, you know, wide smiles and wrinkles go together. Honesty, well, there you go... who would declare her age after 35 nowadays?

Going-40-and-couldn't-be-more-happy.

JB - better to have wrinkles and a smile on your face than a smooth complexion and frown.

Toed-- I have also noticed that people are friendlier in Canada. I found it a strange experience to have strangers (who, after all, sound just like Americans) spontaneously start a conversation with me. That's something I'd absolutely never ever encounter in the US (except, as I already noted, when the person has a foreign accent).

jbtan-- it certainly must help to have a non-threatening "baby" face along with what surely must be an ebullient personality. It probably also helps to be female, since a solo woman probably doesn't push the oversized "be afraid, be very afraid" button in Americans that a solo man pushes. So I consider myself lucky when families and couples simply ignore me while traveling (rather than calling the police). I haven't had anyone call the police on me, but I have had people ask me what I'm taking a picture of and why. Because there's no obvious family member or friend in the picture they probably assume I'm a terrorist. The fear-mongers in Washington clearly deserve praise for their success.

Catbert-- I'm a lifelong resident of Los Angeles, where everyone is a stranger. Definitely not a good city for a solo traveler of either sex to visit, if only because long freeway trips are exhausting without someone to help navigate and/or share the driving.

JBH - that photo thing is a huge problem here in the States. I hear so many people who have been confronted when taking pictures (especially solo men). A lot of them are self-inflicted (sitting outside a medical building facing the entrance, taking photos of children at a bus stop while inside a house, etc.), but too often a person alone standing and taking photos of landmarks, architecture, etc. will attract attention. It is ridiculous.

Canadians are extremely nice and welcoming. It's become my favorite place to travel. Lots of sights, lots of friendly folks, lots of space, and rocks and trees and trees and rocks!

toed- The "photo thing" is understandable. It's very difficult to identify actual terrorists, especially since there really aren't that many of them. Photographers make fine substitutes, especially if they're not taking the obvious tourist happy-snaps of their kids. As do solo travelers, particularly male ones. Anything that's "different." Going after the substitutes-- with Official encouragement-- is a way we can all feel safer, especially since the people in power feel it's beneficial (for them) if we're ever more fearful and paranoid.

That isn't meant to minimize the real danger we face from all sorts of criminals. But I don't think it's beneficial for politicians to exploit that real danger and turn the country into a Fortress of Fear.

I agree with everything said about fear. Mistrust/fear is the #1 factor promoting war IMHO. If only all of us -- across races, nations and borders -- can just get along... sigh...

I had some pretty bad experiences going through immigrations in Central Europe and Canada just because the previous #1 terrorist in Asia came from Malaysia (my home country). I was stuck in the immigrant office in Montreal -- this after my 10-hour layover that I mentioned in the other thread -- for an hour before being interrogated by an officer and then had my luggage 100% checked. Worse time ever! For Central Europe (in Warsaw, Prague and Budapest), they took a long time going through my passport and whatever info on their computer screens.

I have found that having the following help to expedite my 5-meter walk through the immigration checkpoints:
1. If I'm invited to attend a conference, I will get my client to send me an official invitation letter.
2. If I'm in the country for business or to write a specific report, I will do up a list on the accommodation (impressive 5-star ones help a lot!) and major industry players/government offices that I will be meeting (to add credibility)
3. Put the above items into a folder together with namecards/any relevant documents and carry it with me (as opposed to locking the documents in the checked-in luggage!)

And no matter how cranky I am after the long-haul flight, I will paste on a smile, can the agitated look post-haste, and just be eager to answer any question as if my life depends on it.

JBH - I agree. I don't blame security guards, etc. for questioning folks. Usually, if the person being asked just answered back politely, they would be left alone. Unfortunately, it's a habit (in this country at least) to get an attitude right away, and that doesn't help any situation.

jbtan - it's not like your life depends on it, is it?

Hi Toedtoes,

You just imagine those poor people queueing behind me, getting ever more exasperated by the minute as the officer scanned through every page of my passport. They must be wanting to throttle me... ;-) So, in a way, yeah, my life depends on getting the seal of approval on my passport/visa real fast...

I thought I'd throw out another trick of mine.

I pick up an inexpensive plastic pendaflex coupon holder. It's got about 12 sections and clasps with an elastic. I identify sections for: air travel; road travel; lodging; food; gifts; souvenirs; admissions. Before I leave, I put confirmation notices, lists of gift ideas, etc. in the appropriate sections. I identify how much money I've budgeted for the sections. The rest of the sections are labeled for the locales I'll be visiting. In these sections, I put any necessary directions plus the sights I've identified that I want to see. As I travel, I put receipts in the appropriate sections so I can easily calculate my budget as I go. I add a couple blank sheets to each section so that I always have something to write on.

The coupon holder fits in my bag (carry-on, tote or purse) and easily holds a pen or pencil. I can also fit an inexpensive travel diary in it. When I go through customs, it's extremely easy to fill out the forms as I have everything in one place.

The best thing is that I don't find myself wondering what happened to all my money halfway through my trip.

You might also try bringing along an audio tour such as one from ijourneys. That way you can walk around with an MP3 player rather than a guide book (standing out like a tourist) and receive an in depth tour of a city. There are a few companies out there now who are creating audio tours.