Lea here--what's the one very, very, very best tip you can give for soloing?
Mar 31st, 2005, 10:12 AM
#41
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What's so crazy about going to a different country on your own to see things that interest you?
The safety and solo concerns are exactly the same for men as they are for women.
Go to England if you want to and I would be surprised if you found hordes of women harassing you - everyone (male and female)will see you as just another sightseer and hopefully help you along the way.
The safety and solo concerns are exactly the same for men as they are for women.
Go to England if you want to and I would be surprised if you found hordes of women harassing you - everyone (male and female)will see you as just another sightseer and hopefully help you along the way.
Apr 3rd, 2005, 07:26 AM
#42
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I just moved to the UK by myself, and am staying in Cardiff until I get a job in london. I know a total of one person in this city. the house where I am staying doesn't have internet access, other than dial-up, which kills me. Anyway, when i first got here (3 weeks ago), I was using the business center at the local Hilton to do e-mail, but then I found out that the starbucks also has broadband acces, and I started going there. The staff know me, and it is such a nice thing to be greeted by name.
Apr 3rd, 2005, 09:28 AM
#43
hey fairfax, while I have never had the adventure of a move somewhere so totally new on my own (good for you!), I do find e-mailing (my sister usually) is a good way to get over any rough bumps of loneliness (even on a shorter trip).
Apr 3rd, 2005, 12:08 PM
#44
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Fairfax.
Can I suggest you post this in the Europe section as there are a lot more people who fequent this site. I am not familiar with Cardiff but have you any hobbies or have you checked out if there is an american club in the area? (I am assuming you are from the US).
Also check out if there are any courses in the local colleges you would be interested in, but most of all follow Suze's advice and e mail home to various friends & family freqently.
Can I suggest you post this in the Europe section as there are a lot more people who fequent this site. I am not familiar with Cardiff but have you any hobbies or have you checked out if there is an american club in the area? (I am assuming you are from the US).
Also check out if there are any courses in the local colleges you would be interested in, but most of all follow Suze's advice and e mail home to various friends & family freqently.
Apr 3rd, 2005, 08:12 PM
#45
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Hi fairfax – I am sorry to hear your predicament. I have been in your position. It can get very lonely. Internet and telephone can help some. You can also look for people from your own country within a reasonable distance from where you are staying. If there are any restaurants or grocery stores from your country or a country that has similar food, check them out. You can get a lot of information from them. I do not know where you are from. Try to seek out other internationals. You do not need to learn the language obviously so registering in a language class to connect to other internationals is out.
Apr 4th, 2005, 02:58 AM
#46
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Thanks for the good suggestions! I am from the US, but am staying in Cardiff with a fairly anti-social friend, who has stayed with me for weeks and weeks at a time. Since he's the only person I know, it's been a bit strange. Also, I am only in Cardiff temporarily, as I am job-hunting in London, and it is much cheaper (free) to live here than in London. So, I am reluctant to join groups or make friends here, knowing I will move soon.
I am also on the Europe board, and have some suggestions from there. Once I move to London, I will make a good effort to meet people.
Meanwhile, I am poking around the city, using the internet at Starbucks, and walking a lot.
Thanks again!
I am also on the Europe board, and have some suggestions from there. Once I move to London, I will make a good effort to meet people.
Meanwhile, I am poking around the city, using the internet at Starbucks, and walking a lot.
Thanks again!
Apr 8th, 2005, 10:59 AM
#52
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I love to videotape with no commentary. The local sounds are the best soundtrack and when I watch my movies, I am transported back to that place. When traveling solo, it's easier to focus on photography & filming and to JOURNAL!!!
Apr 11th, 2005, 11:32 AM
#53
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Hi JBN.
Hope you're still looking at this forum. Just wanted to thank you for the compliment about my book, Solo Traveler. (Lots of men seem to like it, even though I write from a woman's standpoint.)
Nice to see a guy on the forum. According to the poll Fodor's just did, more men than women travel solo (37 percent; 34 percent I think, for women). But women sure like to talk about it more.
You could tell your wife that traveling on your own makes you miss her more and that there's nothing like a reunion to spice up a relationship. (I cover that, in the last chapter, Breaking Away.)
All the best!
Lea
Hope you're still looking at this forum. Just wanted to thank you for the compliment about my book, Solo Traveler. (Lots of men seem to like it, even though I write from a woman's standpoint.)
Nice to see a guy on the forum. According to the poll Fodor's just did, more men than women travel solo (37 percent; 34 percent I think, for women). But women sure like to talk about it more.
You could tell your wife that traveling on your own makes you miss her more and that there's nothing like a reunion to spice up a relationship. (I cover that, in the last chapter, Breaking Away.)
All the best!
Lea
Apr 11th, 2005, 07:08 PM
#54
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Hi Lea--
"Nice to see a guy on the forum. According to the poll Fodor's just did, more men than women travel solo (37 percent; 34 percent I think, for women)."
I wonder-- did the poll distinguish between business and leisure travel? Lots of men travel solo on business (as do lots of women), but I have trouble believing we outnumber women as solo travelers. All the books, articles, and Internet forums I've seen about solo travel are almost exclusively by and for women. Maybe women are just more enthusiastic about it?
Regardless, I'm glad to see you championing the cause of solo travel. The more women you encourage to take trips by themselves, the more respectable solo travel will be for everyone. Perhaps the travel industry might even wake up and realize that their shareholders might benefit from welcoming solo travelers on their cruises and tours instead of punishing them with unaffordable supplements or forcing them to share accommodations with strangers.
"Nice to see a guy on the forum. According to the poll Fodor's just did, more men than women travel solo (37 percent; 34 percent I think, for women)."
I wonder-- did the poll distinguish between business and leisure travel? Lots of men travel solo on business (as do lots of women), but I have trouble believing we outnumber women as solo travelers. All the books, articles, and Internet forums I've seen about solo travel are almost exclusively by and for women. Maybe women are just more enthusiastic about it?
Regardless, I'm glad to see you championing the cause of solo travel. The more women you encourage to take trips by themselves, the more respectable solo travel will be for everyone. Perhaps the travel industry might even wake up and realize that their shareholders might benefit from welcoming solo travelers on their cruises and tours instead of punishing them with unaffordable supplements or forcing them to share accommodations with strangers.
May 3rd, 2005, 10:38 AM
#55
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Hi JB,
The Fodor's poll was about pleasure travel, not business. I agree that probably more men travel on business. But again, women rule the forums, so it seems like more of us travel solo. Certainly, more of us talk about it.
I have been doing lots of radio regarding my book, and while most of the women interviewers are enthusiastic, most of the men don't seem to get it. They are far more negative about the idea of being on your own. I can almost hear them shudder....
Lea
The Fodor's poll was about pleasure travel, not business. I agree that probably more men travel on business. But again, women rule the forums, so it seems like more of us travel solo. Certainly, more of us talk about it.
I have been doing lots of radio regarding my book, and while most of the women interviewers are enthusiastic, most of the men don't seem to get it. They are far more negative about the idea of being on your own. I can almost hear them shudder....
Lea
May 5th, 2005, 01:03 PM
#56
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If you have family that are nervous about your traveling alone (my 88 year old mom still worries about me) buy a phone card and telephone during the trip every few days.
Even from Europe to the North America, the calls are inexpensive and go a long ways toward reducing anxiety. And they think you are so nice!
Keith
Even from Europe to the North America, the calls are inexpensive and go a long ways toward reducing anxiety. And they think you are so nice!
Keith
Apr 7th, 2007, 03:08 PM
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Thought this was a great post, so I'm bringing it back to life.
My tip: if you're feeling lonely, maybe you're doing it to yourself. I spent a month solo in Montreal (study abroad), and the whole time felt lonely.
Now I realize, walking down the street with sunglasses and an MP3 player, then spending alot of time in my little room is not the best way to battle loneliness. Biggest tip would be to ditch the MP3 player and headphones; almost no one will bother to approach you with them on. If you want human contact, make yourself approachable.
My tip: if you're feeling lonely, maybe you're doing it to yourself. I spent a month solo in Montreal (study abroad), and the whole time felt lonely.
Now I realize, walking down the street with sunglasses and an MP3 player, then spending alot of time in my little room is not the best way to battle loneliness. Biggest tip would be to ditch the MP3 player and headphones; almost no one will bother to approach you with them on. If you want human contact, make yourself approachable.
Apr 8th, 2007, 01:55 PM
#60
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We're going to make a solo traveler out of you yet Corshi! 
Suze - the "dress down" stuff made me laugh.
First, most "unwanted attention" is harmless and usually a smart-**sed remark or walking away will work (you can also walk into the nearest shop if they start to follow and wait until someone leaves the shop and leave with them).
Second, for those that aren't harmless, no makeup, hiding in your clothes and no eye contact will tell them that you are meek and intimidated and an easy mark. If you actually have a fear of the person, tell the hotel staff, talk to the police, etc.
If I'm approached, I behave like I am: strong-willed, confident and sarcastic. That pretty much throws them off long enough to move on.
Suze - the "dress down" stuff made me laugh.
First, most "unwanted attention" is harmless and usually a smart-**sed remark or walking away will work (you can also walk into the nearest shop if they start to follow and wait until someone leaves the shop and leave with them).
Second, for those that aren't harmless, no makeup, hiding in your clothes and no eye contact will tell them that you are meek and intimidated and an easy mark. If you actually have a fear of the person, tell the hotel staff, talk to the police, etc.
If I'm approached, I behave like I am: strong-willed, confident and sarcastic. That pretty much throws them off long enough to move on.
