Snarky replies


Jan 2nd, 2012, 04:37 PM
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Snarky replies

In the last several minutes, I've read 3 snarky replies to travel questions. (Yes, one was in response to something I had said). Two were to/from others --doesn't matter who. My question is, why do responders on Fodors feel the need to put down OPs who come here asking for travel advice? Or make snide remarks about another fodorite who has posted an opinion? I think a good New Year's resolution for all of us would be to be civil in our responses and not try to be "cute" or "smarter" than everyone else. This shouldn't be a "who's best" forum.
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Jan 2nd, 2012, 05:08 PM
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Crckwc1, I couldnt agree more. Posters come here looking for helpful advice, not to be put down. I will say, the majority of responders are very helpful and make this site a great resource. But to the few who insist on responding with attitude - Lighten up; its a travel forum!

If you dont have anything nice to say, dont say it at all.
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Jan 2nd, 2012, 05:41 PM
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Amen to that. If you think a question is stupid, don't answer it! It's possible to disagree with the premise of a question without belittling the person posing the question. This is not the place to engage in a petty rivalry with another Fodors user with whom you might disagree.
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Jan 2nd, 2012, 05:53 PM
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crckwc1; Agree with your observations. There are some people here that can't wait to criticize a posters question. Richard
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Jan 2nd, 2012, 06:20 PM
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Someone else had a thread like this one last year and was asking the same question. And I agree. But, some posters have to feel superior over others. Happy Travels!
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Jan 2nd, 2012, 08:14 PM
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I do not know the posts in question but there is always the following dynamics:

1. Everyone here voluntarily gives there time, knowledge, and experience;

2. Many people ask the same questions as those posed the week before. I have seen the identical questions asked on the same day. And if you direct them to previous postings some get insulted because their trip is much different, at least in their minds;

3. Half the time people do not even extend the common courtesy of a thank you when the question is answered;

4. A minority of the questioners get annoyed if not answered in a timely manner and in the manner they requested;

5. Many people give little information but expect a full answer;

6. Many people do not do the slightest bit of research and expect strangers to know their tastes, budget, time, and interests and then get annoyed when return questions are posed.

7. Some names are familiar and there is some banter and comraderie.

While people who respond should be more patient, on the other hand when you are asking someone for a favor, that person should be polite and helpful.

Personally, I do not answer those who have not done a stitch of research but there are many who in an earnest and honest manner. I also have a personal prejudice and do not recommend hotels and restaurants I have not been to in at least year.

But there are scores of earnest and honest people who give what they think is the right answer.
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Jan 2nd, 2012, 08:23 PM
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There are several Fodorites that post wrong information daily. I don't see anything wrong with others pointing that out to someone that may not be aware. Don't know if that is what happened in the threads you are talking about.
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Jan 2nd, 2012, 09:32 PM
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kybourbon, Certainly nothing wrong with pointing out an error. I was referring to sarcastic quips which are neither informative nor polite.

aduchamp1, I totally agree with what you're saying, but none of your examples fits the scenarios to which I refer. The OPs in these cases were politely asking/discussing and were, IMHO, answered with rudeness and ridicule.

I think I'll just have a glass of wine and call it a night.
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Jan 2nd, 2012, 09:40 PM
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My pet peeve is someone who posts a question, doesn't like any of the answers received, proceeds to argue with those who are kind enough to answer the question, then posts comments which reveal he has a hidden agenda of one sort or another or is asking the question only because he wants his own opinions validated. I can understand when those who have spent time and effort trying to help such people get a little testy. But snarky? No, not necessary.
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Jan 2nd, 2012, 09:43 PM
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I agree with Audchamp1 and kybourbon's comments. Again not sure what posts you're referring to but one probably should not take them personally. There are a few Fodorites that sometimes get chastised for seemingly being snarky or even rude but, IME, they are also the ones that give the most accurate and informed responses. The vast majority of us are just trying to help, and I think it's highly doubtful if any disrespect is ever intended. Well at least in most cases. I have to admit that I've come close to a snarky comment or two myself.
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Jan 2nd, 2012, 10:25 PM
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No, I don't think disrespect was intended, but I do think the comments were, at best, thoughtless and, at worst, rude. I'm just suggesting that each of us -- myself included -- should put more thought into the way we answer questions, and more care into our comments -- or else just don't respond. There's an old saying "if you don't have something nice to say, don't say anythng." It's good advice.

I promised I would shut up, have a glass of wine and retire. Now's the time.
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Jan 2nd, 2012, 11:06 PM
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Some of us who spend time over on the Lounge, where snarkiness is almost the norm, may simply be carrying their snippiness over to the "regular" travel forums. Some of the lounge rats do not suffer fools, and are quick to lash out at anything they perceive as contrary to good sense. I tread warily over there, as the political threads can get really nasty.

I agree that the savaging of newbies, and the innocent should not be tolerated on the "real" travel side of the house.

Let's play nice.
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Jan 2nd, 2012, 11:58 PM
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I think that we should all be given a "snarky quota" at the beginning of the year because some posts are so appalling that they are both impossible to ignore and impossible to reply politely to. But such things should be used with parsimony.
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Jan 3rd, 2012, 12:34 AM
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1) it is possible to read good caring advice as snarky. For instance we regularly get "I have seven days and want to see Greece, Barcelona and Amsterdam while learing Flemish". Yes you can do it but who would
2) Some fodorites give "hard love" that is the "pleasure" of an international free advice dialogue,

"Savaging newbies" is just wrong. Other forums easily identify who is a newbie for the writer. Maybe Fodors should add a "L" plate for the first 3 months.
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Jan 3rd, 2012, 02:30 AM
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"I might be going to Paris or Rome next year. Is there anything good to see? Do they have A&W root beer?"
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Jan 3rd, 2012, 03:33 AM
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This is my problem with email; you don't hear tone or see body language. I've had the same reaction to posts as crckwc1 alludes to. Some people are just rude and they're probably not going to change. The good news is that in my experience (on the Europe forum at least, which is where I live on this site), 99% of the posters are genuinely helpful and patient.

kerouac, to your point, how many times have we answered, "Tell us what your interests are, what your budget is, when you'll be there...". I think that's the point of this board, though. There's always a first trip to somewhere. I like bilboburglar's about, "Hi, my name is Ellen and I'm a Newbie..."?

Happy New Year to all Fodorites; may all our advice be constructive.

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Jan 3rd, 2012, 04:48 AM
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Best for me to be kind and share only my experience and not be critical of the opinion of others.However there are numerous spammers touts commercial trolls that post with
for prfit bias.Newcomers need to be warned of these factually.
Have seen the clueless scammed out of thousands on trips that
could have cost hundreds if they did careful research.Some information is flat wrong that must be pointed out.Like
yesterday a poster who was flying into Rome/FCO wasadvised
to train to Orvieto??? to rent their car.How clueless is that?
What a wasted of money and time.

So for me live and let live mostly unless hurting others.
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Jan 3rd, 2012, 05:11 AM
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incorrect medical advice from people who are not doctors
probably has the potential to harm the most.On Tripadvertizer an "expert" advised advised a young Brit tourist not to take an altitude illness preventive in Titicaca trekking up to 14000 ft.Cost her her life.So for me pointing out incorrect info factually is not "snarky" as long as others are not
personally attacked.
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Jan 3rd, 2012, 05:57 AM
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I agree with what ellen75005 and Kerouac said, but most of these comments are good.

When I write something that might be considered snarky, I often point it out by adding something like "this is not meant to be snarky" or a .

Why? Because what passes for snarky in one part of the world is the normal mode of speech in other parts. I live on the East Coast of the United States where snarkiness is a way of life, and it is easy to hurt feelings when you can't see how people are reacting.
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Jan 3rd, 2012, 06:07 AM
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" Because what passes for snarky in one part of the world is the normal mode of speech in other parts"

Try explaining that to South American footballers.

Liverpool's star player has tried to argue that calling dark skinned human beings "a negro" is socially acceptable in South America.

We all speak various forms of English, sometimes.
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