I'm going to Scotland and although I'm trying to learn a few Scottish phrases, I'm worried that I won't be able to communicate with the natives. Do they speak English? Will the automatically switch to English if I try to speak some Scottish words to them first. In France, if I speak English really loud and really slow, and I add an "ez" to every word, they seem to understand me. Will the Scottish natives be that quick, or will they be angry with my feeble attempts to speak their language.

They'll understand you if you speak "Scottish", but might think you're strange. Everyone we met spoke English. The biggest problem you'll have is when they ARE speaking English, and you still can't understand what they're saying. The brogue can be a bit thick at times, but of course they probably think a Texas accent is hard to understand too.

Fie, Fie! Troll!!!!!

I'm sure you think you're clever for writing a troll like this, but you obviously don't know that there ARE two Scottish languages, Gaelic and Scots. And, yes, there actually are people who speak those languages, even though they also speak English. So find another country to troll about.

Jeff, no-one will believe you unless you look like you've worn a kilt all your life, prove that you are a true Scotsman and catch at least three haggis before breakfast, no matter how good your brogue is.<BR><BR>Mind you Hollywood has produced some great movies for you to practise along with. Can you name any?

But Haggis may be out of season when he is there!<BR><BR>Just remember ..say Erin go Braugh to every Scotsman you meet and all will be well..it's the universal greeting in Scotland

Wait a minute! You CATCH haggis? I thought it was a sheeps intestines filled with inedible, execrable goo!

Sheila's correct. You do catch haggis but it can be difficult! Best time to hunt is about an hour before sunrise. The most succulent are usually found on the lower slopes of Scottish hills that are well covered in heather. No heather, and the haggis will be a bit peely wally.

So, if I was to try to trap a haggis, what type of bait would I use.<BR><BR>Do they taste like chicken?? or are they gamey??

THe best way to go on a Haggis Hunt is to take your old mother or some other hag with you.<BR>

you don't bait them Jeff you net them. I remember as a child my great-uncle having two or three haggis nets (known as rumpeltons) always hanging up behind his front door. They were passed down through generations. Also, the secret of a succesful catch is to make sure you chase them UP the slopes of the hill. They tire easily.

You folks keep talking about catching haggis, but I thought they were put on the protected list and, therefore, you could only bag one per season (September 23-November 27, right?). Wouldn't that then be Haggi? Or is haggi the plural? Or can you hunt several as long as you let all but one free? I'm confused!

My old granny used to breed haggis hounds. As you know, haggi try to escape by running clockwise round mountains so the hounds are specially bred with two legs shorter than the others.

catch haggis?... "Och never!"

the best thing to do is ask the gas station clerks where to find the little haggis. they will then lead you to the Mama Haggis - she's pretty fearsome but OH the stories you will have when you get home!