Marzipan

LOL - I am glad I posted here, for the good advice and laughs.

Thanks to you all.

suze

Yippee, finally something interesting to read around here -LOL. Hopefully Marzipan doesn't mind sharing her fun thread all around!!

111op

Sorry, I'm confused, Suzie.

You were flirting with E at the meeting. But how? If you had flirted with E in person, then you'd realize that this was a woman, no?

I don't understand the story.

111op

By the way, if you marry this guy, Marzipan, please invite us to the wedding.

And it'd be interesting to get an update after the trip so we know what happened.

suze

111op, the Englebert at the meeting was a man. the Englebert in the chat room turned out to be someone different, a woman... right?

Leely

I should really do some work today, but 111op, I think Suzie was bored at her meeting and IM-ing.

There's a lesson there, somewhere.

Oh, right, back to work.

azure0327

Marzipan, please do let us know if you meet him, and how it goes. I bet you did not anticipate receiving this many responses to your question did you?

111op

But are the two related in some fashion? How did the woman know that you had flirted with an E at the meeting?

Are they a married couple looking for a menage-a-trois?

gertie3751

Marzipan, if you do all this in London, give me a shout, I'd love to be a fly on the wall

Scarlett

Suzie!! LOL..

Marzipan, to repay us all for our endless advice lol, I think you MUST remember to post a detailed trip report. And be sure to let us know if this 'guy' is named Englebert

I read about someone meeting a stranger at the bottom of the steps in Italy before, Catbert, was it another Fodorite??
How funny if the two of you told the same story months apart! She spent the week with this person too!

Ahhh romance online.. This is much more fun than a soap opera.

SuzieC

THere was a MAN I was talking to.
The LADY was only ONLINE pretending to be THAT man. To fool me, you see?

oh nevermind...now I'm blushing ...

mah1980

I know that meeting online is pretty mainstream these days, but do you really want to commit to spending any amount of time with someone in a foreign country that you don't really know?

Maybe you should just meet him for coffee, then figure out if he seems like a psycho thus eliminating future problems. Also, don't tell him where you're staying or what you're planning on doing on certain days.

111op

But how could the lady fool you? I guess I'm just not getting it. She would have to know that you were talking to an Engelbert, etc., to assume his identity.

Never mind. Maybe I'm just stupid.

FainaAgain

I have a "friend", a man who assumed a female identity on the Internet chat lines. He's not afraid to give away his home address in Australia. On his birthday he got several flower arrangements delivered

salina5

Several years ago for several years I belonged to a group called, "Travel Companion Exchange" (TCE). You paid a small fee and biographies of other members were sent to you. There were no pictures, usually, but the salient details were there: where they wanted to go, descriptions of them, what they did. Also included were instructions/suggestions on how to interact initially with someone. These included meeting, if possible, during the daytime, on your home turf, corresponding for a lengthy period, etc. It's not that different from dating and a lot safer than picking up people in bars! Some 15 years ago, I interacted successfully with a Ph.D in Geology whom I still visit with and like very much. I travel with him because I know him pretty well by now. This is NOT usual, so far as I am concerned. Other folks have other intentions. Be careful what you do, please. There are some charmers out there and one does not need to be put into their arena to be charmed, then challenged. Solo traveling is just fine; no one with high self esteem really HAS to have a travel partner - yeah, I know, when one is on the Amalfi Coast it is lovely to have someone to "oh" and "ah" over the beauty, but it is not an absolute requirement - you can do that just fine by yourself. Stay safe first.

llamalady

Call me naive, but the idea of an internet stalker scouring the Rick
Steves website in search of potential
victims to seek out in Europe strikes
me as a little far-fetched! ;-)

Off the wall, perhaps; off the Graffiti
Wall, unlikely!

However, if he wears big glasses and
well-worn walking shoes............

SeaUrchin

My friend and I met a man from the internet, in fact Fodors, and spent some lovely time with him in Italy.

He was a true gentleman and showed us around different areas in his car. We had exchanged photos beforehand and emailed for a while too.

Marzipan, I think it would be nice to meet up with him and, not expecting anything, have a lunch or a coffee and play it by ear. I would make sure all intentions are made clear before you leave the table though.

cigalechanta

I suggest this first time meeting to pay for your own drink or lunch so you "öwe" nothing and it gives a signal.

SeaUrchin

Great advice! Be your own person and don't act like you need a companion! Signals are the key.

If you don't look like a victim or show a a victim mentality he might think twice if that is what he was looking for.

LindaL

Okay, my turn. I met a guy on the internet, we exchanged e-mails, we talked on the phone and he came to visit. I decided to go to Europe with him for 3 weeks and it was one of the most memorable trips I have ever taken. The gentleman was Art Hussey and he is no longer with us. Art posted on Fodors about wanting to get a group together to go to Eastern Europe in the fall of 2001. I was the only one that replied. He came up from L.A. for the San Francisco Fodors GTG and we talked and decided we could travel together for 3 weeks without killing each other. Use comon sense at all times.