Marilyn

Just remembered another. Boboli Gardens in Florence, 2 older American female tourists, looking up at the Medici insignia over a gateway: "Just look whose balls are up there!"

Mucky

Last year whilst in a French Hotel we ran out of the little plastic milk containers, you know the ones that hotels provide with tea making facilities. So I asked the receptionist chappie in my bestest French for some more Lait (= milk) unfortunately I pronounced it &quot;Lait&quot; and not &quot;Leigh&quot;.<BR>He disapeared for a few mins and came out of the storeroom with a smile and a 60W lightbulb.....it raised a chuckle !!<BR>Muck

Lorac1127

We were at the Louvre admiring Michelangelo's slaves. A man in the background who was looking for these sculptures told his wife, &quot;These aren't Michaelangelo's, these were done by some Buonarotti fellow. Let's go.&quot;<BR><BR>We laughed all day over that one.

emjoy

I must add another one of my family's Tonto Spanish advneture in Europe when I was a child. We pulled up to a camp ground in Spain and my Father decided he didn't want to pay until he saw the campsite, so he told the woman at the front office in Spanish that he would pay but only if he could &quot;look at her insides&quot;. Needless to say she didn't let us in.

Victress

We're military, stationed in Germany. We have Euro style license plates, but a NATO symbol instead of european union symbol, and USA instead of a one or two letter european designation. We drove from Germany to France a couple of years ago, and as we pulled into the parking lot a car followed us in. We were talking in English as we walked up the sidewalk and the man behind us asked in halting English &quot; you didn't DRIVE from the US, did you??&quot;

Powell

This anecdote is not what was said but what was thought (by me).<BR><BR>In Provence some years ago I lost a large dental filling. Our hosts took me down a dark alley to the village's dentist. There was a crowd in the outer office. I took a seat and noticed a large piece of dental equipment, circa 1945. It was shaped like a tee with wires coming down. At its base was a pedal. I shuddered remembering that in olden days when you went to the dentist he had to step on the pedal to bring up electricity.<BR><BR>Happily it was there as an antique not an advertisement and the dentist thenprovided remarkably good service with modern equipment at a fair price.

Gaia

An American asking us as Europeans - which train to take at Atlanta airport. When we said: no idea, he told us that we should, as we had a lot of Underground trains in Europe.

Joost

'Drove from the Netherlands to the south of Belgium once when we got lost in a small town in the French speaking part of Belgium. Luckliy enough, there was this mighty looking hair-dresser standing in front of his business, enjoying a quiet moment in the evening sun. My friend, always bragging about how good his knowledge of the French language actually was, roled down the window and started conversation with the words:<BR>&quot;Bon soir, monsieur le coiffeur&quot; (&quot;good evening, mister hairdresser&quot.<BR>The guy looked into the car and answered:<BR>&quot;bon soir, monsieur le touriste&quot; (&quot;good evening, mister tourist&quot.<BR>My friend, realising he had used a rather strange expression to greet somebody with turned red, roled up the window in a hurry and hissed &quot;Oh d*mn, drive, go, GO!&quot; .<BR>

rquirk

When in Merida, Venezuela I was sitting reading a book on a bench. When a forward, attractive woman asked if she could sit with me I replied in Spanish:<BR><BR>Si Te Quiero (Yes, I want you)<BR>instead of <BR>Si Tu quiere (If you want)<BR><BR>she went away in hysterics and it clicked for me three minutes later.

Shon

We were lost in Paris, looking for the Louvre. We saw a family of five approaching and stopped and asked them if they could help us find the Louvre. They were wonderful and gave us tips about how to do a quick tour and save time. We thanked them and then the man asked &quot;How did you know we were American?&quot; I laughed and said &quot;The Whatsuppp? t-shirt gave you away.&quot;

progol

My favorite story is not mine, but a former professor's.<BR>He was in the army, posted in Germany in the early 50's. He had always wanted to visit Paris, and finally got a weekend leave. He spent an enjoyable weekend there, and after the visit, it was time to return to the base. <BR>After searching and searching for the train station, he realized he was lost. And so, he stopped an elderly gentleman and asked him where it could be. He clearly was not pronouncing it very well (le gare-- &quot;luh gahr&quot, because this elderly gentleman looked at the younger man dressed in his army uniform and said,<BR>&quot;Monsieur, la guerre est finie!&quot;<BR><BR>

mpprh

Hi<BR><BR>Neither of us was travelling, but I had a car accident 2 weeks ago in Montpellier.<BR><BR>The american lady who hit me said &quot; I'm real grateful I hit someone who speaks English !&quot;.<BR><BR>Funny, and not so funny for me ?<BR><BR>Peter<BR>http://tlp.netfirms.com/expat<BR><BR>

Mucky

Whilst stood on the Airport observation balcony waving mother in law off on her holidays, my wife noticed the plane had a large tanker parked alongside, this tanker had 'BP AIR' written over it.<BR>Looking quite puzzled she asked &quot;do they have to pump the tyres up everytime it lands&quot; !!!<BR><BR>Muck

emjoy

I had to revive this topic because I just remembered a taxi trip in London two years ago my friend from Texas told the driver we wanted to go to 'St. Pancreas' station, not 'St. Pancras'. He found it amusing but polietly choose not to correct her.

bookchick

I'm friends with someone who works as a tour guide in Rome. I accompanied him in February with a small group to the Vatican Museum and St. Peter's Basilica. In St. Peter's, one of the women in the group asked me if the Basilica was ever filled with people. I told her when special Masses were celebrated, this happens. She asked if everyone has to stand, and I informed her they bring some chairs and kneelers in, and she asked where they're stored when not in use! (????)<BR><BR>BC

cigalechanta

I told this one on another thread. In the first few years going to France, I found it very difficult to pronunce the name of places. Our hotel was one of them. It was in Arles, a very famous old one called &quot;Nord Pinus&quot; after many frustrating attempts one day, I blurted out we were staying at the north penis.

Susie1366

Last year in Capri, my husband and I were in a gift shop when th owner started singing in Italian and an American tourist screamed out &quot;THAT IS SOOO BEAUTIFUL. I LOVE TO HEAR ITALIAN SINGING&quot; Anyway she went on like this while she made her purchase. After she left, the owner laughed an said, Avete visto quella signora quando ho cominciato cantare, &quot;lei vi siete fusi come burro nella mia bocca&quot; (did you see that lady, she melted like butter in my mouth). We both cracked up.

LVSue

I think I've told this before here, but here goes: a friend who had been to private school in Switzerland before I met him in college (in Texas) met me at a restaurant in Paris.<BR><BR>He (the worldly one) asked the waitress: Ou est la salle de bain? (where, literally, is the bath room--not toilettes as is the custom)<BR><BR>She responded: Pourquoi? Vous voulez prendre un bain? (Why? You want to take a bath?)<BR><BR>HAHAHA! I loved it!<BR><BR>Second story: in an Acapulco restaurant at the table next to us, the guy ordered &quot;the toreadors.&quot; (I believe the menu said &quot;tornedos.&quot

Canam

On my first trip to Venice, we had lunch just after arrival and boarded a vaporetto. We were sitting in facing seats, having a nice conversation with our Italian host, when we heard some not so suble tones coming from behind. &quot;Imagine that! Here we are on the Grand Canal in Venice and it doesn't even STINK.&quot; We later found that they were doing their day in Venice, coming from Montreal to take cooking courses in Florence.

alan64

On a French train heading to Spain, a middle-aged man from Kentucky was traveling with his elderly mother. Thirsty, in his southern drawl he asked the French porter, &quot;Por favor, where is the agua?&quot;