Heavens

This is bugging me. We just got back from a two week trip to Europe. A fabulous trip to Ireland and Paris. So many people say "and how was your trip?" only to go on and on about their trip to Paris five years ago after you give them a two minute report. It is so aggravating. Or they on about their next trip and all of their plans. Why do they even ask...I know, I know, so they can talk about themselves, which is so much more interesting, right? UGH!

xaroula

haha I'm guilty of this! It's why I joined these forums so I could talk based on my experiences and actually help people instead of piss them off but yes, I notice this a lot... I think it's human (frail) nature to want to talk about oneself and connect things to what they themselves experienced. be patient -- and when they come back from their trip, do it to them!

Christina

well, you want to talk about yourself, don't you? I think it triggers memories that they enjoy reliving and they like the place so enjoy talking about it.

It sounds like you don't like these people very much, you are saying not very nice things about them. So, avoid these people and find other people you like, I'd say, instead of complaining about your lack of audience.

tcreath

I think people mean well, but they get reminded of their own trip and it can bring back memories. I try not to do this, but sometimes its hard not too, especially when you can relate to something the other person is saying about a place that you had already been. I understand your point though, and always try to be mindful and not overtake the conversation when I hear about someone else's trip.

Tracy

lucielou

Its called the Me Me Me , syndrome! very common in society these days!

Just try to ignore them Heavens, they are just sad, little people.

dublincailin

I know some like that alright! They keep going on about how their trip was so much better than mine, how they got better value, they ate nicer meals, they stayed in nicer hotels..... I just yawn and yawn and try to change the subject!

bardo1

Heavens,

Welcome back! Hope you had a fantastic anniversary. I remember your many questions prior to your trip snd am eagerly awaiting YOUR trip report. I promise not to turn your thread into a discussion about my trips. When can we expect a trip report?

Intrepid1

A good lstener will be remembered long after a long-winded talker.

Pausanias

I can't blame people.

I think few of us have the narrative skills to make a good story out of "What I Did On MY Summer Vacation."

And even if we do, there is the old line from Oscar Wilde to consider: "If other people are going to talk, conversation becomes impossible."

You know how your eyes glaze over while they're talking? Watch their eyes when it's your turn! Keep it short and sweet and they may return the favor. Either that, or work up a really good routine and take it on the road. Mark Twain did well with that.

SeaUrchin

Oh, it is human nature, don't worry about it. Have you noticed it with other subjects you bring up? It is a way of connecting, sometimes it makes a good conversation, where you can compare stories. Basically people are more interested in themselves anyway.

Just talk about your trips here, write a report, refer to your own experiences and we will all read it and roll around in it and compare it to our own experience.

StephenG

Travel is no different than telling the same pereson about something your kids did or that you bought a new car. After your first 30 seconds they go right into how theirs was blah, blah, blah.
The great thing is you are the lucky one that went to 2 of my favorite places, Paris and Ireland. Waiting to hear all the details.

L84SKY

It's simply a conversation. You're lucky that your friend wanted to talk about travel. I know it's difficult not to go on and on about a recent trip but really, that can easily be boring.

kswl

Travel stories to top one's own, while annoying, do not begin to approach the sick/dying/while I was in the hospital/let me tell you about MY operation/ stories. Prattle on about Paris, please!

wally34949

My pet peeve is when one is when they say, "did you go here?" and when you say no, they say, "Oh, you need to go back. You missed out."

kswl

and often their visit was 30 years ago!

tcreath

I agree completely with L84SKY. I am usually happy when I get someone interested enough to have a conversation with me about my trip, even if it includes details about theirs. I have a few friends who would care less, and get bored within seconds. I have a really good friend who probably doesn't even know where Europe is, let alone any of the countries it in. I come home anxious to tell her all about it, and all she wants to talk about is her pregnancy, which I had already been hearing about for months!

Tracy

Neopolitan

Hmmm. Are you saying you don't want to hear about their trip to Paris -- even if it was five years ago but still as important to them as your recent one was to yours? I guess I don't get the complaint. It seems you are saying "I want to talk about my trip but I don't want them to talk about theirs."

Let's be honest. Probably the only reason they even asked about your trip was because theirs was so special to them, and they like to be reminded of it. Why would they care more about what you saw and did than about what they saw or did?

ira

Hi H,

It's better than having them talk about their kids, or their grandkids, or their operations or their aches and pains.

By the way, did I mention my recent visit to Paris?....

laughingd2

Kind of like coming back to work on Monday and a co-worker asking "How was your weekend?" solely as a pretense to tell you about theirs. Which I suppose is more polite than "Let me tell you about my weekend."

Or my favorite: the people who never ask about your kids unless theirs did something amazing (at least to them), at which point they say "So how are your kids?, then get your kids' names wrong, then wait a good 15-20 seconds before going into what their kid did.

But this is God's way of reminding us to not do the same, and to keep it short.

Heavens

You all are so funny and it really helps me when you make me see the funny side of things. I was talking to my friend yesterday..."how was your trip?" I go on for about a minute..."well, did you stay in any castles? Did you go to Hermes? Did you do any of the 15 things that we did on OUR trip when we went?" In other words saying that bc we don't have her over the top budget we couldn't possibly have enjoyed our trip as much as she did hers five years ago. Actually I had already heard about most of the trip. And then she goes on about how badly the French shopkeepers treated her wonderful children (she does have wonderful children) when they went inside the tres expensive shops, yada yada.

HECK NO, I don't want to hear about HER trip. I want to prattle on and on about MY trip. Hers was so boring compared to ours...LOL.

OK, trip report coming. Had to jump back into work so not a lot of time for the computer. Will post soon.

Suffice it to say that I am sick for having to leave Paris and counting the days until I can return again where I rightly belong, cruising the Seine and eating every crepe in sight, finding corner cafes to wash the chocolate down with. WE loved it. I am IN LOVE with Paris and France...more later. Thanks, good Fodors friends.