I was talking with my cousin who just returned from a ruined trip to Europe.
She and her husband went with another couple whom they have known for years, but on a more or less formal basis. Nevertheless they have had many evenings out togther and thought they would travel together for three weeks!
The woman turned out to be so high maintenance that she picked at every meal in almost every restaurant; told every waiter in English just how she wanted every dish prepared and with what ingredients; would return the dish if she didn't approve of it (even a tiny perceived flaw); berated the maids at the hotels when they were not up to her American standards; threw the towels down in front of the maid and demanded thicker ones; had a taxi stop and let her out when the driver drove too fast.
The list went on and on, my cousin was horrified at how spoilt she was and how her hen-pecked husband bowed to her every wish, while expecting my cousin to do the same.

This could be a good lesson to all of us to try a short trip with someone we may be considering traveling with and put them to the test. My cousin and her husband are easygoing but this couple pushed even them to the limit. They tried to talk it out, but the couple thought they were in the wrong.

Even so, people have different traveling styles so make sure they match with yours.

well, I agree with that, but I can't believe your cousin couldn't have known some of these things if she had known the couple for years. The restaurant habits, for example -- every person I know like that (high maintenance in restaurants) is that way in ALL restaurants, not just in Europe. I just don't understand how they could spend so many evenings together and she wouldn't know this. As for the maid, etc., why would that affect your cousin since she wouldn't be in the same room with them, anyway. I wouldn't think it a good idea for any grown adults to travel together for that amount of time who didn't know each other very well, for three weeks is amazing. So, I think your cousin doesn't sound very sensible and I just can't believe someone acts totally different in Europe than at home. Also, if your cousin didn't like them so much, why on earth where they eating all these meals with them?

I kind of wonder why your cousin wanted to travel with them in the first place, but I don't understand those kind of things or your cousin's behavior or how she knows so much about the friend's behavior with the chambermaid. My parents went to Europe with my mother's sister and her husband, but that kind of made sense.

They are having some contest in the Washington Post travel section for stories of bad travel companions, maybe she should write.

They were all waiting for the woman to finish putting on her makeup when she threw the towels so they were in the doorway at the time.
The times they had eaten together here they had been in groups.
But my cousin thinks the real problems arose because the lady thinks she is, well, better than the common folk in Europe. She comes from an old family in the US and is one of those people who thinks the Old Country is backward, etc. None of this came out beforehand.

I think too that Cousin should have been a better judge of her character before they left, but they are members of the same social clubs and let that fact dim their senses, which I told her this morning. It wasn't very sensible of her I agree, and now she is miffed at me too for not being very sympathetic.
Oh,well, I thought the story might help someone as gullible as Cousin.

Chardonnay, I topped an older post about 'travel partner horror stories' for you to enjoy!

Thanks, I will print them out and read them tonight and then mail them to her!

Your thread is a bit irresistable. I have always been extremely cautious about traveling companions. I have discovered that the only good traveling companions are those who can be somewhat independent. If you get sick of each other, even if it is one-sided, you have to be able to go off on your own without offending your travel companions. If you think you cannot do so without offense, or if you believe you must sightsee and dine together at all times, DONT' GO! You will regret it.

Even the most beloved spouses or best friends aren't necessarily used to spending 24-7 together, and that intensity of time, along with unfamiliar places, new expenses,a and the occasional travel problem (missed train, disappointing hotel, etc) can test even a familiar relationship in new ways, sometimes to the point of considering murder.

Three weeks is a long time to travel, and too long to commit to if people haven't traveled together before. Christina is right, most of that bad behavior can't have come as a total surprise if they'd been out together before.

Yes, I also agree that even spouses or friends needn't be joined at the hip.
A little time apart, a meal here and there taken separately, a day where one takes a day trip and the other goes shoppping, makes for relief and excellent dinner conversation the next time all are together.

There is the idiot you describe and then there is the opposite -- my companion of 47 years.

To give you an example: this past August on a flight from Philadelphia to Dublin we were an hour's flying time off of the coast of Ireland when the voice on the PA system announced that we had a fire in the forward cargo hold.

A few minutes later, we caught a glimpse of the cockpit and it was full of smoke. The crew, pilot and co pilot, had on oxygen masks.

My wife did not blink. She pulled out the safety instructions and started to read them just before the chief flight attendant began to review everything required.

We made it safely to Shannon and the sprinkler system on the aircraft had the fire under control by the time we landed.

I wonder what the female you describe would have done under those circumstances? Screaming would not help. And she could not tell the pilot to stop so she could get out.

It was an interesting experience to say the least.

I think of high maintenance as my ex-lover. She needed to eat at the best-in restaurant or whatever faddish garments she wore but she was not that type of bitch that is described. A guy has to be sick to stay with a chick like that.

My goodness, Dixon, what an experience! I have to say I don't know what I would have done seeing the pilot with a oxygen mask on!

I have spoken this evening to Cousin, she says that at dinners previously the woman showed little signs of her behavior but it escalated on the trip.

Come to find out, they now know that it was a marital problem that was causing her behavior. The lady in question had found another woman's love notes in her husband's suitcase while she was packing it for the trip! So she was acting out at him the whole time and my cousin and husband had the misfortune to be alone with them for the three weeks after this discovery.

So the plot has thickened, the lady had just called Cousin to explain - after the fact and the ruined trip!

So I don't know what the moral of the story is....

The moral is obvious: Always pack your own suitcase.

I love these threads...were all so weird when we are away from familiar territory.
I have travelled to Europe twice with the same 2 friends. The first trip of 4 weeks was uneventful and fun. So much fun we planned the second trip for 18 months later......big mistake.
I met them at Rome feeling refreshed and non jet lagged because I had spent 2 weeks in London. They on the other hand had done the trip from Australia and were really tired. We never argued, but friend 1 would get angry beacause friend 2 and myself ironed our clothes before we went out, plus we had a an exciting hair regime...but in our defence it never made us late. Friend 2 acted like she was landed gentry. I quickly learnt that my habit of giving a blow by blow description of our next destination whilst in the car was boring. I was also a really bad driver in Italy and that caused understandable friction.Basically the 3 of us were really boring, painful and intolerant intermittently for 5 weeks.
We are now no longer friends unfortunately and we still work together.We are dreadfully polite to each other but it's hard to believe we travelled together.
I am now taking my 18 year old daughter to Europe for 4 weeks next July, I have warned her that it may get rough...and she laughs and says "don't be so silly". I have cut my hair so not so high maintenance now..just wash and wear.
No doubt she will be doing a post next year about psycho mother in Italy!

Marilyn, your great response has not gone unnoticed and unappreciated!

Marilyn

ditto to Howard. That was a classic!

sounds like a fun person

chardonnay, by chance, was your cousin a french waiter in a previous life?

We have a female in-law relative who rejects the first three hotel rooms she sees, dawdles with the fourth, then accepts the fifth or sixth. Maybe it's feng shui. Maybe she is just nuts. In any case, I wouldn't travel across town with her and her docile husband.

A bad travel companion is a scarey thought with the situation I'm in!

I'm just starting to plan a trip to Europe that my husband and I are going to take with my brother & sister-in-law. We all get along great and have made one short trip to NYC together in the past (where we did split up and meet back together) & that went well. But, I'm a bit worried about this trip - mainly b/c this is a 1st time trip for all of us and I know there will be stressful situations & my husband and sister-in-law both like to be the "leader". I just hope we all come back still speaking to each other!

Two headstrong "leaders" sounds like big trouble waiting to happen. Better have plenty of "apart time" built into the schedule.

Yes, yes, yes, to that one! Being joined at the hip 24/7 to anyone on any vacation is a recipe for disaster. We've had the most success when we eat breakfast with travel companions, depart for the day's activities, and then compare adventures at the end of the day. Daytime trips together are only on upon mutual consent, and no hard feelings if an offer is declined.

We stayed four days in Umbria with my husband's brother and his wife and I was ready to scream!!!!! What I would say if I weren't worried it would get back to him...oh no, 24/7 together is a bad thing!