Whilst Thailand is undoubtably an assualt on the senses, you can find some out of this world hotels, at bargain prices, that will make a nice peaceful retreat after a days adventures!

Unless you are very nervous, you will have no trouble with Bangkok and the rest of Thailand as a first time visitor, my parents did it when they were 60! They just used the services of the hotel concierge and reputable local agents (Tour East) to sort all the sort sightseeing out for them. They had a wonderful time!

tracy---one option that just came to mind is to go on a limited guided tour such as those offered by the airlines: check out northwest's world vacations, united's offerings, thai air internationals offerings, singapore's air, cathy pacific, eva air.....they all have great travel programs in aisa....usually they include the flights, transfers (which can be problamatic for some if you don't know the ropes), hotel accomodations at various levels of lux (even the cheapest will be acceptable to americans---for instance on my first bkk trip we were on a n/w deal and they put us in the royal river hotel, which is tourist class (probably 3* and it was well located on the river and quite comfortable, but not deluxe).... it also included one or two limited sightseeing excursions with others available for a fee, plus transfers....
often you can extend on your own for a few days as well...

Tcreath-you might try Gregg at Innovasian.com to arrange parts of your trip. He's located in the US and is very knowledgeable about Asia. He can schedule all or just a part of your trip. This way any anxiety you might have can be reduced. It's easy enough to do everything yourself, but his arrangements are relatively cheap. He sets up individualized transfers, hotels and tours depending on your budget. If there are hotels or sites you want to include you can compare his price to what you can book online. Have fun.

Thank you for the great suggestions on vacations. Both were great and I have been checking out websites this afternoon (between work, of course .
I did find a vacation on Gate1.com that looked interesting. It includes 3 nights Hong Kong, 3 nights Bangkok, 2 nights Singapore, including airfare to/from the US and to each location. This may give us a nice intro and includes several locations. Although we wouldn't be at one on place very long, we could get a feel and then we can look forward to returning eventually if its as wonderful as I think it will be! But I'm still open and exploring the possibilities, so any more recs would be more than welcome!

Thank you again for such great help!
Tracy

Hong Kong, Bangkok, and Singapore are all wonderful destinations, but they are all urban environments. For an Asian overview I think you're lacking a more rural-resort-y destination. Maybe substitute Bali or Northern Thailand for one of these stops.