If you flew yesterday . . .
Aug 11th, 2006, 02:49 AM
#1
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If you flew yesterday . . .
Can you bring an empty water bottle through security and then fill it with water at the gate?
Did they ever turn off the fasten seat belt sign during the flight?
Are the airlines selling 2 ounce bottles of water for $5?
Did they ever turn off the fasten seat belt sign during the flight?
Are the airlines selling 2 ounce bottles of water for $5?
Aug 11th, 2006, 10:52 AM
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I flew yesterday. No you can't bring a water bottle through and fill it up and take it on the plane. If you buy a bottle of water in the terminal, past security, you have to consume and discard it before getting on the plane. They did turn off the fasten seat belt sign, and no, no one is price gouging or selling bottles of water. Again, you can't take anything on the plane you buy in the terminal.
Aug 12th, 2006, 02:55 AM
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Aha! This solves both the book and liquor problem. Put your red wine in a large coke bottle, then guzzle it down at the airport. You'll pass out soon after your get on board and won't need to read books.
Aug 14th, 2006, 11:05 AM
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Wally - they're only making an exception for "baby formula", merlot resembles juice not formula. You need to switch that out for kahlua and cream. 
Maybe you can rent one of those lifelike dolls - tell security it's a class project...
Maybe you can rent one of those lifelike dolls - tell security it's a class project...
Aug 16th, 2006, 06:54 AM
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Saw this today in the Borowitz Report...loved it 
<b><font color="indigo">FAA Bans People From Flights</font>
<u><i>'Zero Tolerance</i></u> for People,' Chertoff Says</b>
In a move aimed at further tightening airport security, the Federal Aviation Administration announced today that it would ban all people from flights leaving or entering the United States, effective immediately.
The FAA, which has in the past banned such objects as toenail clippers and hair gel, took the extraordinary step of banning people after the Department of Homeland Security conducted a thorough investigation of previous terror plots.
"We looked at terror plots of the past, and in each and every case, people were involved," said Homeland Security Michael Chertoff at a Washington press briefing. "These new rules send the strong message that the FAA has zero tolerance for people."
Mr. Chertoff said that while banning liquids from flights was a constructive step, the only true solution was to ban people altogether.
"Let's face it, hair gel doesn't kill people," he said. "People kill people."
...
The FAA's ban on people onboard flights raised questions for the nation's airlines, which must now ponder what, if anything, their airplanes will be carrying.
But Davis Logsdon, who studies the airline industry at the University of Minnesota, said that the FAA's crackdown on people could be a "win-win" for the airlines: "Maybe if the airlines don't have people to worry about, they can finally concentrate on getting our luggage to the right destination."
<b><font color="indigo">FAA Bans People From Flights</font>
<u><i>'Zero Tolerance</i></u> for People,' Chertoff Says</b>
In a move aimed at further tightening airport security, the Federal Aviation Administration announced today that it would ban all people from flights leaving or entering the United States, effective immediately.
The FAA, which has in the past banned such objects as toenail clippers and hair gel, took the extraordinary step of banning people after the Department of Homeland Security conducted a thorough investigation of previous terror plots.
"We looked at terror plots of the past, and in each and every case, people were involved," said Homeland Security Michael Chertoff at a Washington press briefing. "These new rules send the strong message that the FAA has zero tolerance for people."
Mr. Chertoff said that while banning liquids from flights was a constructive step, the only true solution was to ban people altogether.
"Let's face it, hair gel doesn't kill people," he said. "People kill people."
...
The FAA's ban on people onboard flights raised questions for the nation's airlines, which must now ponder what, if anything, their airplanes will be carrying.
But Davis Logsdon, who studies the airline industry at the University of Minnesota, said that the FAA's crackdown on people could be a "win-win" for the airlines: "Maybe if the airlines don't have people to worry about, they can finally concentrate on getting our luggage to the right destination."
Aug 17th, 2006, 04:50 AM
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That reminds me of an airline joke!!!!
A man walks into an airport terminal and checks his luggage. He tells the lady behind the desk, "I want this bag to go to Memphis and this bag needs to go to Little Rock." The lady behind the desk says, "Sir, we can't do that." The man replies, "Well, you did last time."
I can hear the laughter.
A man walks into an airport terminal and checks his luggage. He tells the lady behind the desk, "I want this bag to go to Memphis and this bag needs to go to Little Rock." The lady behind the desk says, "Sir, we can't do that." The man replies, "Well, you did last time."
I can hear the laughter.
