BDE

Hi

During this visit we will visit an old colleage of mine and spend some time with his family. And we are now wondering about what we should buy them ,as a "visiting present".
We have never been in their home before and are unsure about if there any customs are regarding this.

Any ideas coments are very welcome

Cassandra

It is both customary and nice to bring a token -- preferably (in your case) something from Denmark -- of appreciation for being invited. It's called a "hostess gift," because traditionally it's for the hostess more than the hostess BUT it can certainly be for the whole household. Not extravagent but meaningful.

If you were stateside, it could easily be food or wine or flowers, but since you'll be arriving from Denmark, you could bring something non-perishable. Maybe something crafted by a Danish artisan (silver, pewter, ceramic, wooden, woven, fabric, etc.)

Once you're there, it's a nice idea to take them out to dinner (or heavy weekend brunch) for one of the meals, esp. if they've cooked special meals for you or taken you out to a special place.

BDE

Thank you for your fast responce.

This is actually very close to what we have talked about here.

Bringing a gift for the hostess is of course a must.

I think we would also like to bring some "real" gifts for them individually ,but are unsure about what to buy.

by the way we will not stay at their house just visit for a few hours.

We will spend time together by going somewhere "fun" together .stll discussing where.

nytraveler

If you're not staying with them than a nice hostess gift and giving them a meal is certainly plenty. If I were in that position I would be embarrassed by more gifts - too much.

overlookfarm

How nice that you are coming here to visit. Welcome! I hope you enjoy your stay.

Just visiting someone for a few hours here does not ever call for a hostess gift or "visiting present", and certainly not an offer of a meal from you. Your visit is considered gift enough, especially as you come from so far.

If you were staying with them as houseguests overnight that would be different. But, if you want to bring them something simple I am sure they would be delighted. Something Danish would be best, but it need not be expensive. Maybe a special candle as candles are so Danish or some chocolates the family could share - Danish chocolate is sooooo much better than ours, just wrap it in the wonderful Danish paper with your flag on it that is used for so many occassions in Denmark. That alone will make the gift special.

A simple short visit requires nothing from you as guests; however, it does call for the people you are visiting to treat you to whatever refreshments are appropriate for the time of your visit. And, if you all do decide to go somewhere together, common courtesy requires that they treat you as guests to their country. They should take you to a meal or pay for tickets to a movie, event or museum - not you pay for them.

At the very least, good manners dictates that they ought to pick up the cost of something during any time you spend together because it is understood worldwide that travel is costly. Paying for something has long been a time honored way of showing hospitality to visitors.

Tango

If I had my pick I would always like sweets as a gift! Cookies, candies, chocolates...any of those work for me! And, I'm guessing most people are like me!

I think this type of gift is thoughtful and kind while not being inappropriately extravagent.

BDE

Hi Again

Thank you for all your inputs.

Just for the record : I/we do not feel obligated in any way to purchase gifts.

I am sure they do not expect us to bring anything.

Could bringing them gifts bring them in a uncomfortable situation because thay havent bought any ?

We must consider what to do ,because we do not want to make this a "problem" in any eay.

BDE

By the way.

Danish chocolate might be good ,but Danish candy is very special .Some of it is not even sweet..

Danish pastry is called Wienerbrød here .Freely translated that is bread from Vienna.

Dukey

Sorry, IMO regardless of the time spent it is always a good idea to arrive with something even if it is a trifle or totally consumable.

They will NEVER forget that you went to the trouble of doing so, especially since it will only be a for a few hours.

Odin

Danish liquorice or marzipan, Anton Berg chocolates. Mix for making glogg.

suze

That's why a small box of a special Danish candy is good in my opinion (thoughtful but not large enough they feel they need to reciprocate).

Cassandra

Unless what you bring them is big, expensive, heavy, etc., you needn't worry about overwhelming them. It's very nice to bring them, as I said, a "token" that says you were looking forward to seeing them and thought they might like to have this little "remembrance." Even if you are "only" business partners, it's still a positive gesture in the business world to bring something symbolic of cordiality.

If the situation were reversed, what would be considered customary and/or nice?

I'm guessing it wouldn't be too different.

crefloors

Salty licorice might be interesting. I haven't seen that anyplace but Denmark..Sweden maybe? I didn't like it much because I don't like salt so didn't look for any in Sweden. A lot of people like salt so that could be a fun little gift.