Steve Mueller

<BR>Those of us that have been around this forum for awhile have meticulously resolved some of the most difficult and sensitive issues facing US-European relations. As a service to newcomers, I have summarized the answers to the many thoughtful questions, as well as the resolutions to the many vicious debates, that we have painstakingly accumulated during the past few years. I am sure that I have forgotten a few, so feel free to expand the list. <BR> <BR>------------------------------------ <BR> <BR>Are Americans more obese than Europeans? - Yes. But they have better teeth. <BR> <BR>Why are Americans more obese? - Because they weigh more. <BR> <BR>Why are dogs allowed in French restaurants? - Because they make better employees than French people. They never go on strike, they are polite to the customers, and they don't object to being called "garcon." <BR> <BR>Are Parisians really rude? - Only when compared to New Yorkers. <BR> <BR>Why do French men have girl's names like Jean, Michelle and Dominique? - They don't. That was a vicious rumor started by Germany soldiers during World War II. <BR> <BR>Is Jerry Lewis really popular in France? - Yes. Lewis' artistic vision was never fully appreciated in his native land. <BR> <BR>Will Gypsies throw babies at me while they pick my pocket? - Yes. But you are not expected to catch them. <BR> <BR>Is Europe safe for blacks, gays and Jewish people? - Yes, as long as you don't travel back in time. <BR> <BR>In which European countries are Americans most liked? - This one can be confusing. The trick is to use the "inverse World War II rule." If they were on the same side as the US in WWII, they don't like Americans. If they were on the other side, they love Americans. <BR> <BR>What is the best thing to do in Paris (or London, or Munich, or where ever)? - Watch for people wearing funny clothes and stuff, which is usually tiip off that something touristy is going down. <BR> <BR>Should I bother to take a camera on my once-in-a-lifetime trip to Europe? - No. Your crummy personal pictures will not be one-tenth as good as a fifty-cent postcard. Plus, a camera would only get between you and your European experience. <BR> <BR>Why do European have bathrooms down the hall instead of in the room? - It is a courtesy to the guests. It keeps people from stinking up their rooms. <BR> <BR>Is flatulence a French word? - I don't know. but is sure is pretty enough to be. <BR>

Jody

Actually I think it is a French word, but the derivation is from the Latin, flatus...blowing . See what a good Catholic education and 6 years of Latin can do for one!!!!

Rich

<BR> <BR>It may well be a French word, but Aggies turned it into an art form! <BR> <BR>(OK . . so I are one) <BR> <BR>Rich

topper

To the top, for those that can use a good laugh.

forgotone

You forgot an important one <BR> <BR>Q: Where can I find sex in Europe? <BR> <BR>A: Go to the Lonely Planet forum, dude.