You know, the little hula dancers with grass skirts that you can stick on your dash? Where can I get one, and please don't say Hawaii!

I have no special love for Hawaii, they just crack me up.

Have you checked at Hilo Hattie's? There's a store in California at the Block at Orange.

If there's not a Hilo Hattie near you, they've also got them on their web site (www.hilohattie.com) for $8.99.

You should consider getting a plastic Jesus instead. You know, sing along...


I don't care if rains or freezes
Long as I've got my plastic Jesus
Glued upon the dashboard of my car

I can go 100 miles per hour
Long as I've got the almighty power
Glued upon the dashboard of my caaaar!

Plastic Jesus Plastic Jesus
Ridin on the dashboard of my car
Once his robe was snowy white
Now it isn't quite so bright
Stained by the smoke of my cigar

I don't care if it's dark or scary
Long's I got Magnetic Mary
Clingin to the dashboard of my car
I feel protected amply
got the whole damn holy family
Just as good as wishin on a star

Plastic Jesus Plastic Jesus
Ridin on the dashboard of my car
You can buy him pink and pleasant
glows in the dark he's phosphorescent
Take him with you when you go afar.

Archie McPhee has 'em, plus a wide selection of other hula- and non-hula-related items:

http://www.mcphee.com

Though I weave around a bit
Cops won't ask me if I'm lit
They can't find a bottle tho they ask
Plastic Jesus shelters me
For his head comes off you see
He's hollow so I use him for a flask

Though the sunshine on His back
Make Him peel and chip and crack,
A little patching keeps Him up to par

When I'm in a traffic jam
He don't care if I say "damn"
I curse all I want to in my car

Plastic Jesus! Plastic Jesus,
Glued upon the dashboard of my car ...

I don't care if it bumps or jostles
long's I got my 12 apostles
Bolted to the dashboard of my caarrrr
Don't I have a pious mess there
Such a crowd of holiness there
Strung acrosss the dashboard of my caaarrrr.

That's almost as bad as asking, "Where can I get one of those southern Mammy dolls?"

Oy

I'm afraid He'll have to go
His magnets ruin my radio
And if I have a wreck He'll leave a scar
Riding down a thoroughfare
With His nose up in the air
A wreck may be ahead but He don't mind.

Trouble coming He don't see
He just keeps His eye on me
And any other thing that lies behind.

Plastic Jesuuuus! Plastic Jesuuuuus....

Through my trials and tribulations
All my travels through the nations
With magnetic Jesus in my car.
I don't have no idol cuter
Comes in plastic , bronze and pewter
Take him with me when I go afar

Plastic Jesus , plastic Jesus........

Thanks for the laughs Jesus.

glad to make you laugh! After all, it's a classic and you don't hear it BLASTED in elevators or supermarkets!!!

They had dashboard hula dolls at my local Target in Michigan.

I don't think my brother's native Hawaiian friends are offended by dolls like these. In fact, some work in the shows at the hotels and many depend on tourists for their livelihood.

As for the doll, I'd like to have a dog with the springy head like we used to have in the car, too.

Thanks for the tips! I don't think I'll offend too many native Hawaiians (I live in the Northeast), and if I do, &#**'em if they can't take a joke.

Tears in my eyes from holding back laughter, must close my office door, everyone will know, my work isn't this funny. Thanks for the morning humor! Struck me as very funny, could be my antihistamine...regardless thx.

Where can I get a dashboard Jesus doll which bobs it's head up and down?

What? There's a dashboard mammy doll? Where do I get me one of those?