Wearing Black to a wedding.
Apr 15th, 2002, 08:18 AM
#21
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Beth, that is what I was thinking. Black to an outdoor wedding at 11am looks like you went out clubbing the night before and slept at your boyfriend's house and didn't have time to go home and change. But black to an evening, candlelit outdoor wedding is entirely appropriate.
And wearing black pants or a black skirt with a colorful top is not the same thing as wearing a black cocktail dress.
And wearing black pants or a black skirt with a colorful top is not the same thing as wearing a black cocktail dress.
Apr 15th, 2002, 08:24 AM
#23
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I would base my decision on the TYPE of dress rather than the COLOR. A formal looking outfit certainly would not fit at a garden party, nor would a more casual look work for a formal affair.
But black doesn't automatically denote formal-wear. (I'm Johnny Cash)
But black doesn't automatically denote formal-wear. (I'm Johnny Cash)
Apr 15th, 2002, 08:55 AM
#28
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OK, wear black if you want to, but I have news for you. Black has been the "in" color for so long that it's now going "out" in favor of colors that actually flatter the individual You.
Frankly, as long as it's appropriate to wear black at a funeral to honor the deceased, it's ALWAYS going to have a slightly funereal hint to it, EVEN if everyone's doing it. I have, however, seen a trend toward wearing white to funerals, so what is that going to do to what brides wear?
I might might maybe maybe consider wearing black with a lot of flamboyant color accessories (scarf, etc.), but probably only if the bride asked me to.
For me, it's a matter of superstition as much as etiquette. It's never appropriate to out-shine the bride, but otherwise it's a matter of how it's going to strike the bride's family, and that depends on what the culture says is a color of celebration (red for some Asian cultures, not white) and what a color of mourning (white for some Islamic cultures, not black).
Frankly, as long as it's appropriate to wear black at a funeral to honor the deceased, it's ALWAYS going to have a slightly funereal hint to it, EVEN if everyone's doing it. I have, however, seen a trend toward wearing white to funerals, so what is that going to do to what brides wear?
I might might maybe maybe consider wearing black with a lot of flamboyant color accessories (scarf, etc.), but probably only if the bride asked me to.
For me, it's a matter of superstition as much as etiquette. It's never appropriate to out-shine the bride, but otherwise it's a matter of how it's going to strike the bride's family, and that depends on what the culture says is a color of celebration (red for some Asian cultures, not white) and what a color of mourning (white for some Islamic cultures, not black).
Apr 15th, 2002, 09:08 AM
#29
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I did a very informal poll a few months ago about this topic. I asked 20 professional men I know what they thought and those that had an opinion preferred their lady friends to wear colour rather than black outfits. Maybe that's because most fashion dictates they (men) wear dark. Curious.
Apr 15th, 2002, 09:18 AM
#30
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Have to weigh in with my 2 cents: we were at a wedding on Saturday -- country wedding, early afternoon. The bride's mother wore black, and to me it just struck an off-balance note.
Now, I wear black A LOT. I just don't think it was appropriate in that context. I would not have considered it for my daughter's wedding -- don't want to send the wrong subliminal message! But whoever said that's what is on the racks when you go shopping is right on... Maybe we should just all wear tuxes. End of problem.
Now, I wear black A LOT. I just don't think it was appropriate in that context. I would not have considered it for my daughter's wedding -- don't want to send the wrong subliminal message! But whoever said that's what is on the racks when you go shopping is right on... Maybe we should just all wear tuxes. End of problem.
Apr 15th, 2002, 10:14 AM
#31
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Blechh: Black "supposedly" went out a few years ago - and it was replaced with brown - remember that? And back it came. Black will never be out.
Women SHOULD wear what looks good on them - regardless of what is in. But go to any club and guess what color 95% of women are wearing. You're tagged a geek if you have on any other color.
Women SHOULD wear what looks good on them - regardless of what is in. But go to any club and guess what color 95% of women are wearing. You're tagged a geek if you have on any other color.
Apr 15th, 2002, 11:01 AM
#33
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Not only is it acceptable for guests to wear black, but I have seen several of the brides' or grooms' mothers wearing black. The first time I saw this was about 8 years ago, and I was surprised [and questioned the choice] but now, it's pretty much the same as 'going black tie'. More and more bridal parties are doing it, and the girls actually get to use the dresses again in this case. My daughter wore a Vera Wang black bridesmaids gown cut down, and it became a very smart looking coctail dress.
Apr 15th, 2002, 11:12 AM
#34
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RnR, You'll have to revise your standard advice. Haven't you been reading the Style section of the Times? Beige is the new black, which of course may be brown, since last year brown was the new black which would therefore make beige the new brown. Being a fashionista takes hard work.
At any rate, you'll have to replace your standard chorus of "black, black and more black" with "beige, beige and more beige", except for NJ, and we all know what goes there!
At any rate, you'll have to replace your standard chorus of "black, black and more black" with "beige, beige and more beige", except for NJ, and we all know what goes there!
Apr 15th, 2002, 11:32 AM
#35
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Kate,
Hope your friend doesn't pick an expensive restaurant. ;-)
I'll give you my short story. I'll just say this topic has mixed reviews - it really depends on the bride and groom and if their wedding is formal, traditional, country versus city, etc. but black is worn at all nighttime weddings I've ever been to.
The last wedding I went to was a blast. Everyone wore black and their sunglasses. It was a summer sunset wedding, outside 18 floors up, looking at the Empire State bldg from two beautiful wrap around terraces. The bride wore a long beaded black number, strapless.
Did I mention that I was the bride?
Hope your friend doesn't pick an expensive restaurant. ;-)
I'll give you my short story. I'll just say this topic has mixed reviews - it really depends on the bride and groom and if their wedding is formal, traditional, country versus city, etc. but black is worn at all nighttime weddings I've ever been to.
The last wedding I went to was a blast. Everyone wore black and their sunglasses. It was a summer sunset wedding, outside 18 floors up, looking at the Empire State bldg from two beautiful wrap around terraces. The bride wore a long beaded black number, strapless.
Did I mention that I was the bride?
Apr 15th, 2002, 11:45 AM
#39
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Sometimes I find myself very amusing ... I agree that black has become the "uniform of choice." This is unfortunate because women with the confidence to wear a colour that suits them do look great and impress me. I am presently packing for my trip to NYC and of course my suitcase is full of black and brown/beige outfits! Ha. Still I have never worn black to a wedding ... yet.
