Forwarded to my email in-box this morning:

You can live in Phoenix, Arizona where
1. You are willing to park 3 blocks away because you found shade.      
2. You can open and drive your car without touching the car door or the steering wheel.     
3. You've experienced condensation on your butt from the hot  water in the toilet bowl.     
4. You would give anything to be able to splash cold water on your face.     
5. You can attend any function wearing shorts and a tank top.     
6. "Dress Code" is meaningless at high schools and universities.  Picture lingerie ads.     
7. You can drive for 4 hours in one direction and never leave  town.     
8. You have over 100 recipes for Mexican food.     
9. The 4 seasons are: tolerable, hot, really hot, and ARE YOU  KIDDING ME??!!     
10. You know that "dry heat" is comparable to what hits you in the face when you open your oven door.      

You can Live in California where
1. You make over $250,000 and you still can't afford to buy a house.     
2. The high school quarterback calls a time-out to answer his cell  phone     
3. The fastest part of your commute is going down your driveway.     
4. You know how to eat an artichoke.   
5. You drive your rented Mercedes to your neighborhood block party.     
6. When someone asks you how far something is, you tell them how long it will take to get there rather than how many miles away it is.     

You can Live in New York City where
1. You say "the city" and expect everyone to know you mean Manhattan.     
2. You have never been to the Statue of Liberty or the Empire State Building.     
3. You can get into a four-hour argument about how to get from Columbus Circle to Battery Park, but can't find Wisconsin on a map.     
4 You think Central Park is "nature."     
5. You believe that being able to swear at people in their own language makes you multi-lingual.     
6. You've worn out a car horn.     
7. You think eye contact is an act of aggression.      

You can Live in Maine where
1. You only have four spices: salt, pepper, ketchup, and Tabasco.     
2. Halloween costumes fit over parkas.     
3. You have more than one recipe for moose.     
4. Sexy lingerie is anything flannel with less than eight  buttons.     
5. The four seasons are: winter, still winter, almost winter, and construction.      

You can Live in the Deep South where
1. You can rent a movie and buy bait in the same store.     
2, "Y'all" is singular and "all y'all" is plural.     
3. After five years you still hear, "You ain't from round here, are Ya?"      
4. "He needed killin' " is a valid defense.     
5. Everyone has 2 first names: Billy Bob, Jimmy Bob, Mary Sue, Betty Jean, Mary Beth, etc.      

You can live in Colorado where
1. You carry your $3,000 mountain bike atop your $500 car.     
2. You tell your husband to pick up Granola on his way home and he stops at the day care center.     
3. A pass does not involve a football or dating.     
4. The top of your head is bald, but you still have a pony tail.      

You can live in the Midwest where
1. You've never meet any celebrities, but the mayor knows your name.     
2. Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor.     
3. You have had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" on the same day.     
4. You end sentences with a preposition: "Where's my coat at?"     
5. When asked how your trip was to any exotic place, you say, "It was different!"      

AND You can live in Florida where
1. You eat dinner at 3:15 in the afternoon.     
2. All purchases include a coupon of some kind -- even houses and cars.     
3. Everyone can recommend an excellent dermatologist.     
4. Road construction never ends anywhere in the state.     
5. Cars in front of you are often driven by headless people

HaHaHaHaHa! I was born in California, have lived in Colorado and New York and now live in Florida. What you say is absolutely true!

I was from California, when we moved to the South, then I lived in NYC and moved to FLorida LOL
I am safe for the time being in Oregon

For Phoenix, add

You think anyone driving with oven mitts on is clever.

You give a wide berth to any car driven with its windows rolled down.

Anyone with a black car is from out of town.

<You can live in the Midwest where: You end sentences with a preposition: "Where's my coat at?">

Well, I don't just don't know where you got that from!

Everyone that lives in NYC knows "The City" is Manhattan.

I know from first-hand experience that #2 in the Deep South section is absolutely true.

AND You can live in Florida where:

6. Wearing flip-flops at a fancy restaurant is normal attire.
7. Cockaroaches are the size of chicken eggs.
8. Walking barefoot on ashphalt at summertime can result in 2nd degree burns.
9. SPF 45 sunblock is the norm.
10. A 7-Eleven Super Big Gulp is considered a normal size drink.
11. If you leave a glass of water outside, the next day mosquitoes will be sunbathing in it.

You can live in Boston where:

1. All the buildings look like you have time-traveled back to the 1800's.
2. Road lanes are BARELY wider than your car.
3. You can hear people saying things like "Whe-ah do I paaak my caaah?" and "How do I get to Woost-ah?"
4. If you go to a Chinatown restaurant, you are more of an annoyance than a actual customer, and you are treated as such.
5. The colleges are great, but actually getting into one....forget about it.

In Arizona:
*Flip flops are worn not only at prom, but at weddings, and other fancy occasions (year round).

*We also give a timeframe instead of milage.

* You have a towel that stays inside your car to cover the steering wheel in the summer months.

* In "winter" you use the A/C in the afternoon and the heater in the morning.

* It really isn't that hot until the temperature gets above 114.

* In the summer you can cook an egg faster outside than inside.

* Everyone considers Phoenix to include Glendale, Scottsdale, Sun City, Surprise, Chandler, Tempe, Mesa, Gilbert, Avondale, Goodyear, etc. etc.

When speaking "the" precedes the number or name of any highway (The Scajaquada, The 33, The 290)
Snow tires come standard on your car.

You have gotton frost bitten and sunburned in the same weekend

You bake with "soda" and drink "pop".

Stop/Slow/Yield Signs..are suggestions.

You can hold an entire conversation on the best place to go for wings, a fishfry or pizza.

You see nothing wrong with watching fireworks downtown on July 2nd.

You not only know what the terms "snowbelt" and "lake effect" mean - you use them on a daily basis.

You save the Genny Cream Ale for special occasions.

You live within 1 mile of a bowling alley.

Not only do you know what it is... but you look forward to "Dingus Day"

You never put your winter jacket away for the summer.

You like to order beef on "weck" and are always surprised when someone doesn't know what "weck" is.

You drive over 70mph on the Thruway and pass on the right.

You leave your ski lift tickets on your jacket year round.

You know how to pronouce, Scajaquada, Cheektowaga and Depew.

The rest of the country is snowbound in the worst blizzard of the century, but you still have to walk your kids to the corner to catch the school bus.

You think nothing of crossing an international border for Chinese Food.

The acid rain is clearer than your drinking water.

When you stop and ask for directions ... you expect to get them.

You don't think Canada is to the north ... you know it's to the West.

You keep the snowplow on the front of the truck year round.

You have a favorite Greek restaurant.

When someone says they are from "the City" - you ask "Which one?"

You think Jimmy Griffin is a "real" politician

You can compute a wind chill "factor"

You eat Orange Chocolate.

You don't have to attend the Friendship Festival to hear it!

You know the difference between imported and real Canadian beer.

You have not been on the "Maid of the Mist" - unless you had out of town company.

You've dined at "Theodore's on the Lake".

You immediatley change the channel when you hear "Hi! this is Goldie Gardner...".

The winter carnival gets rained out.

You call them "Pilot Field" and the "Aud" - no matter what the signs say.

You define summer as three months of bed sledding.

Your kids have watched Sesame Street - in French and Spanish.

You don't get a coughing fit from one sip of Vernors.

"Gridlock" means driving home from a football game.

You wince when someone uses the abbreviation "OJ".

"Rapid Transit" means hitting all the green lights.

You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Buffalo.

Oops, I meant to edit and number my post, but hit the reply button! Sorry.

LOL...cute!

PS...if anyone is looking for a fabulous dermatologist in Tampa, I've got the name for you!

Very funny! It is true that here in Missouri, many people's response to anything new (to them) is, "it's different"...and their thinking just doesn't go beyond that.