Difficult teen...isn't that the norm? Give her a private room with a TV, computer, video games, stereo, DVD player and you won't have to put up with the antisocial behavior because you won't have to interact.

Tess <--mother of a teen girl

Author: hlocke1
Date: 04/29/2008, 12:57 am
Hello all --

"We live in Seattle (for nearly 3 years now) and know what we like here. But, we have a difficult teen coming to visit this weekend and could really use some help! She's a bit antisocial, is into music and books, but that's about it.

Any suggestions would be appreciated!"

Yes, don't coddle her. She needs to learn to adapt to different environments and be appreciative of others. If she doesn't like it, tough.

Thanks again, everyone. She arrives today, so I'll be sure to report back on what goes over well.

Kostroma, she's actually my husband's step-sister. So, we know her very well. My husband is shy and reserved, but this situation is completely different and rather hard to describe. That is why it's a particularly challenging situation. Thanks so much for your input... we'll def. be asking her what she wants to do.

So it's more sullen than shy then?

Well, if you ask her what she wants to do and she wants to hole herself up in the house with a book, I agree with TTess. Let her keep herself company and don't worry about it. I do hope that she finds something to do that's to her liking though.

Hello again, everyone --

Just wanted to report back after our weekend with the visitors.

Friday, my husband took the "difficult teen" and her mother to the Underground tour. He was reluctant as we've taken the tour 3 times before, but they had a great tour guide, so that made all the difference. The teen also seemed to enjoy it. We spent the evening eating at Judy Foo's Snappy Dragon and playing Rock Band at home. Honestly, that went over best of all. She's 18, so we thought she'd be more into seeing the town, but we were wrong...

On Saturday, we went out for a large breakfast followed by the teen deciding she wanted to spend the rest of the day in the house. We went ahead and ventured out with her mother for awhile instead, honoring her request to be left behind. So, Tess pretty much nailed it! =) That evening, we all went to Red Mill for burgers and made a short visit to the Chittenden Locks. The teen wasn't loving the weather (it was a little misty and cold that evening) and this isn't a great time of year to view the fish ladder either (peak time is June-September). So, our visit was brief.

Sunday, we went to Easy Street for breakfast in West Seattle. Score! The teen enjoyed eating there and liked that she could shop around while we waited for our food. Afterwards, we headed over to Constellation Beach where the tide was extremely low. There were a lot of large starfish, anemones, and crabs to look at. While we thought this was pretty neat, she seemed lukewarm to it. They left for Vancouver in the afternoon...

Thanks again for everyone's input. I think we did the best we could!

Also, one last note that I should have added into the report above:

We asked the "difficult teen" a couple of different times if there was anything in particular she would like to do, but received no answer in return...

Appreciate the update, had wondered how the visit went.

All so predictable. Gave me great giggles reading it. A couple of months ago, we flew our high school daughter down to L.A. to spend a few nights with her college sister. I wasn't sure if she'd come back alive. Her sister had enough of her by the second day. Teenagers!

Hlocke1, I am convinced there is a crown waiting for you.

And I thought I wasn't "understood" when I was a teen...hmmm, given some of the responses now I can see why.

Totally with you there, Dukey. I was also "misunderstood". I totally called and apologized to my mother after the "difficult teen" left us yesterday afternoon.

Tess, you're too funny! =) Thanks again for helping me keep my own expectations real. It's hard not to take situations like this personally sometimes!

When I was out and about yesterday, I wondered how your weekend was going. Glad that you survived.

I never went through the "surly teen" phase, so I don't think I'll ever get what it actually stems from. Sounds like quite the ride.

Thanks, Kostroma! Hope you enjoyed that amazing weather we had. Not much could have ruined a day like that... =)

You're welcome, hlocke1. I just glad you survived!