LADIES!!! Thanks to ALL of you who put in your 2 cents. OliveOyl, I WILL check out the Neiman Marcus web site. When I find something, I'll report back to y'all.

My. god, but is it okay for a guy to be peeping in and reading these comments? This is one thread I'm printing and hanging onto ... amazing stuff. Tonal definition in the calves ... my gosh. This has just been a fab thread ... I am perfectly serious. More style here than in a thousand others. Hopefully all of you will reconvene on some future topic. I'm no lizard, but I will monitor. Ciao

Midwesterner asked how to avoid looking like an outsider at a DESTIN church wedding. I don't claim to be an expert on Destin or trends or wedding attire, but I could tell from the replies that most of you are not from around Destin. I told what is the general "norm" for this area. We in the Panhandle know we are usually several months behind the fashion trends in most cities.
But I can tell you this: a strapless dress would be most inappropriate in just about any Panhandle Baptist, Methodist, Presbyterian, Episcopalian, Lutheran, Assembly of God, Church of God, Church of Christ or Catholic Church.

This brings back some memories -- several years ago, my sorority sisters and I drove from college to a wedding of a fellow sister. The wedding was a morning service at a Catholic Church in Florence, ALabama. One of my sisters, "Cathy" planned to wear a white dress and shoes. Mind you, it was late September or October. (I remember cause we watched a college football game later that day.)
Someone's mother suggested "Cathy" might feel more comfortable in something else and somebody loaned her a dress and shoes.
"Cathy's" father was a big wig with the Navy, and they had been stationed in Rota, Spain, for some time. She didn't know our southern ways.
Actually, I don't think it would have made much difference. All the little old ladies could talk about was the beer keg in the back of a pick-up truck outside the reception. It wasn't even 11:00 a.m., and the bride spent most of her time at the reception out by the keg. It was one of the most memorable wedding and receptions I have been to.

Great stuff ladies!! I'm glad my curiosity got the best of me and I clicked in. It reminded me to pick up my dry cleaning so I'd have my blue shirt, red tie and dark suit ready for the wedding I'm attending this weekend.
I just have to polish my black shoes
{all four pairs and I can't make up my mind as to which pair to wear---decisions,decisions} C'mon. Wear what you want and feel comfortable in. Hey, but what do I know, I'm just a guy. Oh, but one more thing. NO WHITE!!!!!!!!

Only Pat Boone wears white shoes or old fogies!

Just caught up on this thread and I have a suggestion for great clothes for us over 40 year olds (I'm 41 but I don't feel it). I now shop almost exclusively at Ann Taylor. Their clothes are stylish yet you don't feel like you're dressing like a teenager. Much less matronely then Talbots. They also have the best sales. Look for dresses and shoes there. I love their clothes! (Also I'm opposed to the white shoe thing ANY time of year, just my 2 cents). Happy shopping!

Ladies: Just to let you know I found a dress to wear to Destin. It's a coral-colored, silk, sleeveless sheath, that comes to just above the knee. I bought a filmy gold "shawl" that picks up the coral color in a floral design and very sexy strappy gold shoes. (Those shoes will NOT last me through the reception - but damn, they're cute!)

Whoo... you go girl, knock 'em dead!

Your dress sounds great! Coral is a really beautiful, flattering color. (Have fun!)

Sounds awesome! Have lots of fun! Maybe there'll be dancing and you'll have an "excuse" for kicking off your shoes!

Sounds like you have found the perfect outfit. Hope you have lots of fun. Late September is a beautiful time of the year in Destin.

Just read through all these posts and had a great time getting educated on the detailed rules of fashion!

Here's a question for you etiquette experts: When you say "no white after Labor Day", does this refer to skirts, slacks, and shoes, or does it also include blouses?

Is it considered okay to wear a white blouse or shell with a skirt or suit in the fall/winter months?

Obviously, I know that anything is OKAY,
and that most of you think the rules are nonsense. I'm just curious as to what my grandmother might have said.

I'm about to do some travel on business in some conservative parts of the country, and I'm likely to meet up with some elegant older women who are going to notice any fashion faux pas I might make.

Thanks!

Lynette:
A white shirt any time of year is fine! Taboos after labor day concerning white are: shoes, skirts, pants, belts & dresses (except bridal gowns). Now that I'm typing this, it does seem rather silly, doesn't it? But that's the way it has been since my 80 year old mother was a girl.

Midwesterner,
Thanks for your response!
So, when is it okay to wear black stockings in the daytime?
I still have a lot to learn. But I am getting ready to put away all linen...

Former southern girl myself and yes still worried about all the little fashion rules. Black STOCKINGS in daytime is NEVER okay. black opaque tights in the winter are however fine for daytime. This is a wonderful thread. I love taking about things like this!

Beth,

Yes, it's fun stuff! And just travel-related enough (for me, anyway) to justify keeping it on the Fodor's board.

Can we start wearin' those black tights in the fall, please?? (My days of nylons are over, so I'm always looking for alternatives). What's wrong with black
stockings -- too formal for day?

Guess white tights are just for kindergardeners, huh?

Thanks for your help on these important matters!

Beth: I've got to disagree with you on the black-stocking-daytime-issue. I wear black hose in the winter during the day. This isn't a faux pas in the north - is it a southern thing?

Well, I currently live in Chicago (from Nashville) and I will admit that the fashion rules are much more relaxed in the north than the south. I still consider black stockings in daytime a major faux pas. Black stockings are usually pretty sheer and seen as a sexy thing and much more formal evening attire. Kind of like a cocktail dress, its called that because it is worn during or after the "cocktail hour" but not before. Black opaque tights (much higher dernier) are what I wear in the winter with black skirts and such. Most southern women would agree and I think many women in the north who onsider themselves "refined" or "gentile" would as well. LOL

What an eye-opening thread. To the top!