Neighbors could be close friends but most are hiding in their homes playing with the internet. (like me)

re:the neighbor with the garage.
He painted his house instead.An awful blue with yellow shutters
He is an eccentric economics professor from England,I think he knows exactly what he is doing
THank goodness,I am up the street and can only see their trees!

live out in the woods.only neighbors there are bears.

I'm here to debunk the myth that people in CT are not friendly. We live in a small town in Fairfield County, most people commute to the city and if we don't see at least one neighbor everyday we'll call each other. We socialize constently (OK, party). Tonight we have a our monthly wine tasting, we get together for barbecues about once a month, the moms meet at the playground daily and sometimes we just stay there when the dads are working late (yes, I know it sounds sexist but that's the way it is) and order pizza at the park, we have parties for just about any excuse to have a party. Christmas parties, pool paties, raft parties (we start at one house upriver, pile into floats, kayaks and canoes, tug a boat with a keg and margeritas and raft to another house down river for a pork pull. We have bonfire parties. Next week we have a Caribbean party. We have regular "Sunday dinners" at rotating houses.

My husband runs a few times a week with 3 other neighbors. We watch each others houses, know who's having what work done and who when someone's on vacation. Neighbors just stop over for a drink on a whim. Sometimes it's like we're back in college. I love my immature and fun loving neighbors.

I also want to put in a good word for Conn. I live in Hartford County and over the years, our neighborhood (on a circle of 50 homes) has had block parties, Halloween parties with a "haunted house" fundraiser, a neighborhood newspaper -- even neighborhood t-shirts!

Dear Neighbor,

Not at all surprised that your neighbors
are unfriendly in Rockville. We live there too, and are yearning to return to friendly Manhattan.

In general--and there are certainly many exceptions--we've found that people in the D.C. area are an uptight bunch, concerned with level of education, position, and bank account.

Noo Yawkers are less uptight, more open
to strangers, and much more interesting.

I could go on and on about D.C. vs. NY...

I also live in CT and commute to NY; I know all of my immediate neighbors and many of the people in the neighborhood beyond our street.

It does help to have dogs or kids and sidewalks.

We have high speed internet access via cable but we like being outdoors and check on each other if there seems to be any problems.

Definately were supportive and concerned for each other on Sept 11; everyone on our street came home safely, but not so for others.

We live in a small NJ town and we feel so fortunate to have such great neighbors! We have neighbors on 3 out of 4 side that we are very friendly with and take turns watching each others houses as we all like to travel. It works out so well!

Does anyone like their neighbors in the greater Washington DC area. I live in the area and find people to be very unfriendly in comparison to other places I have lived.

To many egos and big jobs/careers

All,

I grew up in DC and agree, people are a bit on the cool side.

My neighbors in McLean, Virginia are very nice. We chat outside the house and give each other cakes, etc. And when I had my baby 3 of my neighbors gave me gifts! So no, I would say we don't really socialize because we are all different ages, etc. but I enjoy talking to them and they are all friendly.

DC is a big area with people with lots of money and sometimes that is what makes people more to themselves. They are busy with careers and other stresses.

This is an interesting thread. Too bad that careers and other stresses seem to override making friends with neighbors in some places. But maybe it's where people are in their stage of life? That, and the distance of time involved in commuting.

Our closest friends are parents of our childrens' friends, and are also neighbors. It just kind of happened simultaneously, so I guess we are lucky. We are also fortunate we have a neighborhood association with great priorities: Easter and Haloween parties where many neighbors turn out, and an annual neighborhood association meeting that is even better attended. We focus on four annual community work days and have a web site.
But all those are an offshoot of valuing a sense of community and creating it. I liked the post above (that I can't find at the moment) about inviting people over. That's a great way to get started, and what great results!

Stephanie -

You're 37 and have had the same next door neighbors on each side for well over 30 years? Is this a bizarre coincidence, have these people been stalking you since you were younger than 7, or have you not managed to leave home yet?

nina,What a terrific crew of neighbors you have!The social events you have with your neighbors are more of things my husband and I do with our friends.I was a little surprised that you're in Fairfield County.We lived in Darien for several years,and didn't experience that warmth.I now live in a small town along the Hudson in Westchester County.The biggest difference I've noticed between living in CT versus NY,is that here in my area of NY,the r wealthy have what I refer to as an "understated elegance" regarding their wealth.Some of my kindest,genuine,super wealthy neighbors,drive their beat up cars,wear their jeans,and don't flash in your face all of their possesions; very humble~~understated.In Darien everyone was in their Rovers, Jags and Beamers (even if they could barely make those lease payments).It was an embarassment not to drive those cars,be seen at the club,grocery shop in a little tennis outfit. VERY superficial.Here in Westchester,the New Yorkers seem more secure to be themselves;not out to impress or outdo their neighbors.

Hmmm - come on, do you expect Stephanie to leave her home? She's too beautiful and perfect to leave her home she loves so much. Since she was 7, I have to think about that one, you got a good point there. I thought she had 30 neighbors, I better get my head together.

People here talk of neighborhood associations and also of views or trees.
I'm here to tell you that neighborhood associations can be like Nazi's. You can live in a house and later other houses can be built around you and without you even agreeing to it you can be zapped into a neighborhood association when a certain percentage of neighbor's want it and then kiss your rights and freedom goodbye pal. Suddenly we're being told to cut our trees, paint our house in only certain colors, plant only certain flowers in our front yard etc etc etc. This is America? It's like something Stalin would dream up, these neighborhood associations.

I think the following factors have cut down on neighbors talking (socializing) with each other:

1) Dual careers: Both husband and wife are working, many times until 7pm. They have no time or energy to be nice to the neighbors.

2) Diversity in neighborhoods. It is likely now that neighborhoods are full of people speaking different languages and cultures. Also white collar and blue collar people live right next door to each other no one has without much in common. (at least they think so!)

3) Kids do not play outside as much as they use to. With academic pressures, fear of crime, organized kids activities, TV and the internet--- neighborhood friends among the kids are less likely to exist. (kids make their friends in organized activities) So their parents do not interact. In the 1960s, my parents made friends with my friends parents.

4) Keeping up with the Jones (social climbing). People now days are less likely to be open to strangers (even though they live next door) unless they share social and career status or something distinctly in common.

5) People move around so much. Thirty years ago you may have had the same neighbors for most of your life. Now people come and go and they are gone before you have a chance to say hello.

I miss the old days!

Wow, so many opinions and so many lifestyles. I think it all depends on how and where you grew up. I grew up on the west side of Buffalo (Buffalo's version of Little Italy). Very old houses side by side - but, with front porches. Most houses had small back yards, some houses had houses behind them (same lot) and therefore, no back yard. You were "forced" to sit on your front porch. Everyone knew everyone else from the neighborhood. I still run into people from the west side, and even if we went to different schools you still acknowledge and smile at each other as someone you knew or recognized from the neighborhood. I still live in the city. North Buffalo...old, but not as old as the west side. Houses are maybe 80 years old rather than over 100 years old. But we still have front porches. My backyard is for my son to play sports in with the neighborhood kids. My front porch is where I hang flower baskets and entertain visitors. I say hello to my neighbors as they walk to the store. You can still do that here. You don't need to drive to the bank, pharmacy, etc.

Most of our friends now live in the burbs. They ask us why we stay in the city. You can get a LOT of house for a LITTLE money. I don't fault them...I'm thinking about making the move myself (after 40 years of city living). But you know, my son has learned that everyone doesn't live in the burbs with a pool in the yard, that neighbors help each other and look out for each other, etc. He knows that you don't have to be scared to live/work/shop in the city.

Although we're thinking about a move to the suburbs (it will probably take us a few more years to actually do it), I cherish my city upbringing and life and the fact that my neighbors are someone I know and trust.

Funny, my brother moved to Vermont 20 years ago and lives in a house with 80 acres of land and no neighbors. I enjoy visiting him and I know he enjoys his trips back home. Short, but enjoyable, trips for both us us.

I live in L.A., and I certainly socialize with my nieghbors. We get together frequently to have swinging parties or orgies. I have gotten to know several of the neighbor ladies intimately. I love it.

I could not imagine living in a neighborhood where this didn't happen.

Well, I will have to chime in, in defense of Montgomery County, MD. I have lived for 10 years in the same neighborhood, in Potomac, right next to Bethesda and Rockville (mentioned in earlier comments) And I can also make a comparison to NY, having been raised in the '50s - 70s on Long Island. Perhaps it is extraordinary, but we have met our closest friends right in the neighborhood -- we have a group of about 6, 7 or 8 couples, we all have children the same age, all share similar interests, exercise together, carpool together, book club together, attend each others' parents funerals together (unfortunately). I would never think of moving away. And forget the comments about career-minded yuppies -- we all fit the bill (well, ok, now we're too old to be yuppies). And I would never, ever move back to NY -- comparisons to one's youth and neighborhood experience growing up elsewhere don't count -- its a very different world out there.

I am a minister and lived in Alexandria then Arlington Va for 15 years - as much as my husband and i tried to get to know our neighbors, only once, for less then a year, while living in a hi-rise did we ever really exchange visits with a neighbor.
I am now in NJ - very close to NYC - I live on an established block, where most folks have lived here and raised their children, infact, there is an old school on the block - the town's second school (built 1800's) and it is now condos...many of the retired teachers live there. There are many block parties is our town though not on our block. We do see our immediate neighbors, walk into town, go to dinner, exchange Christmas gifts, and we are invited to the big family events (births, weddings, and deaths) it's nice...
we do not have children and I wonder if that makes a difference, they seem to be great door openers for meetings folks.