Ozarksbill

There are many people who have never moved. They live in the same house on the same street for years. Others of us have moved often. And also others just like to travel. We've done both...living mostly in places in Illinois and Missouri and then selling a home and moving to Boston area. This means new friends and new stores and new doctors and new surroundings...and new politics. Many our age move because they are nearer to family...just so with us. Son in Medford and we are in Watertown.

Also we keep on traveling. For years we had three youngsters (now all over 50) going here and there in the U. S. with tent, then several fold downs, then trailers. And also overseas many times. This includes eight Grand Circle tours and soon another to Spain-Portugal. Plus forty-one Road Scholar programs (often to places not yet seen most recently Savannah and Baltimore which I've reported on in Fodors).

Yesterday we met at the public library a young man just moving from our former state of Missouri to work at Boston College. He is looking for housing in Watertown. And with him was his father from Cedar Rapids, hometown of DW. We talked about housing and driving and parking challenges.

We have been here over four years and while missing some things and friends we have appreciated new places and made new friends in our town and in a church. So e.g. Sunday was a trip to Hyannis for the Pops by the Sea and a week ago to Salem for a Whistler seascape painting exhibit at the Peabody Essex Museum and also a recent family gathering in Ogunquit, Maine, and before that a Red Sox day game.

Have any of you made a drastic move and how did it go? We are not yet ready for a retirement center although that is a choice many older people make. Fortunately we are both in reasonably good health.

Dayenu

LOL thank you for asking. 25 years ago we finally got exit visas from USSR, after 10 years of waiting. Moved to the other side of the globe, into a different world.

Never looked back, didn't even visit.

Ozarksbill

Quick response to Dayenu...two years ago I was tutoring English for a man who came from Israel was born in USSR. He is a ski instructor! Now with wife they have a son and family here.

SusanM

We moved to Chicago from my hometown of Madison, WI 26 years ago. Since I left my family and friends behind, it took me about 10 years to stop thinking of Madison as home. Now we are facing an empty nest in the next year or so and we can't wait to sell our too-large house and downsize. I even want to switch to from owning to renting, since DH isn't very good about upkeep and it would be so much easier to leave mowing, shoveling and repairs to someone else. (Lest anyone ask "why is upkeep DH's responsibility and not mine, too," I work and he doesn't. 'Nuff said.)

nytraveler

Nope - have traveled a LOT - pleasure and business - mostly US and europe and love that.

And have moved several times but all in the NY are and in Manhattan (but different places) for more than 30 years. Can;t imagine ever leaving - since we love it here so much and the city is so unique - and this is where all family and friends are.

StCirq

Well, we're in the process (and it is quite a process, even though we came into it with a lot of experience and know-how) of getting ourselves moved to France. Leaving next month for a 5-week trip to start renovations on the house, start the paperwork for my spouse's carte de résidence, meet with insurance agents and notaires and a slew of workmen. I think we've filled up four notebooks with lists of things we need to do. Seems like all we do - make lists, make appointment, fill out paperwork, juggle finances, google for more information on stuff. As soon as we've crossed up 10 things, we add another 10 to the current list. And we probably have a year or more of the same ahead of us before we can take the final airplane over.

I'm really not complaining. I've always wanted this. But yes, it's not small potatoes!

nanabee

When I married my husband I knew he would never move. The house was a disaster and because he didn't want to leave the neighborhood we basically tore down the house and did a major remodel - at least it was a new house. It was the best I could do! I love moving, new experiences, new friends, new neighborhoods, different cultures. He does like to travel so we've done a fair share of travels which is a decent compromise.

starrs

I made one big move cross-country. Had gotten a divorce, a new job and just took off. Brought very little of "old stuff" with me and loved the adventure. I just didn't love the location so moved back but so glad I took the risk and enjoyed the adventure. I've bought two places very quickly because I just knew they were right for me. I've moved about a dozen times as an adult but have come "home" to family land and a little house that will serve as a base when I retire and I travel as much as possible. The funny thing is, my 90 year old dad hated that I moved into this house (his baggage and history, not mine). I absorbed a lot of his anger for the choices I've made - but just a few days ago he said that my being here will make it easier for them to sell their house. He realized that it means a lot to have a home base. Now the parents come out and just sit under the old mimosa tree and I think he feels grounded and peace, instead of anger. There may be another cross-country move ahead for me in future years, but the plan is to always keep this as home.

Ackislander

My wife and I both came from military families where moving was the norm.

I lived in 19 places before I graduated from college and 22 since then, though I may have forgotten a few.

Probably no one cares but some may wonder if I am being truthful when I have posted about a lot of places -- when I lived in Mississippi, when I moved to England, while we have lived in Massachusetts ( or New Mexico or Nebraska). But this explains why.

Lessons learned: First hang the pictures and unpack the books. These are the kinds of things that make a transient residence feel like home. Go to church. Start inviting people you meet to come to your house for a meal. When you move elsewhere, don't try to keep up the same relationships with those you leave behind. True friends will be glad to see you again whether you call them weekly or not.

Dukey1

We moved last year from Northern Virginia where we had lived in three different houses over 40+ years to Florida.

Our place on the beach is not a "retirement center" in any way, shape, or form, since we were already "retired" before we moved here.

In my work position in the service I moved around a lot and IOW, definitely "been there, done that" and believe me, you do not want to know some of those details.

I am not sure if I had kids I would want to be that close to them but then again we have enough money so we could fly to see them if they were even interested. We do this currently when we visit the in-laws since they are totally unable to travel.

Our big move South ranked just below "death of a spouse" for a variety of reasons which I will not bore you with.

The biggest current "issues" have revolved around finding new "services." Yeah, we're in "good health" too but you still need a competent physician and we found one as well as a dentist, a veterinarian, a church home, a painter, a contractor, etc., etc.

Would we do it again? Oh, in a heartbeat but perhaps using a different moving company.

IMDonehere

We were both born in Brooklyn and for about 12 years we lived in a suburb north of NYC. It was quite beautiful, in fact, people would come in the autumn to see the change of color of the trees. We both still worked in Manhattan so that was quite the schlep but the worse part was the insular life, a contentment about being apart from the rest of the world. Now we live in Manhattan and in one 6 block walk, we see more types of people than in 12 years in the burbs. Here there is a vibrant life and greater sense of a world community. Unfortunately our neighborhood is quickly changing with the rise of expensive condos and insane retail rents. We shall see where all this leads.

starrs

Lessons learned: First hang the pictures and unpack the books. These are the kinds of things that make a transient residence feel like home. Go to church. Start inviting people you meet to come to your house for a meal. When you move elsewhere, don't try to keep up the same relationships with those you leave behind. True friends will be glad to see you again whether you call them weekly or not.

Some of the wisest advice I've ever read on this board.

Ozarksbill

Some comments...StCirq: so why are you moving to France? Wow, what a relocation challenge...indeed lists valuable.

starrs...some do move cross country like we did...and some have located in family homesteads. So where you are now, is this OK for shopping, doctors, transportation, etc?

Dukey1...our daughter relocated to Florida, from Amesbury, MA, because husband got teaching job. It has been difficult but they are adjusting though whenever retirement comes it's back to Amesbury house they now rent. Church shopping took awhile for us.

Ackislander...interesting that you actually live on Nantucket where so many vacationers visit. Yes, hanging pictures and seeking a church is good.

Further comments: I should say that we are now renters having sold our house. And that was indeed traumatic. Also we are fortunate in locating all our doctors at Mt. Auburn Hospital not far away in Cambridge connected to geriatric services...
primary care, pulmonary, cardiology, opthamalogy. And have used them alot.

Nikki

I live in the house we bought when we were married 35 years ago. I don't adapt well to change. We are finally having the bathroom updated, however.

starrs

"So where you are now, is this OK for shopping, doctors, transportation, etc?"
Shopping - I do a lot of online shopping but the "big city" is a short drive away and decent shopping within a few miles. I drive into the city to attend church. It's a very special church, although I also attend my grandparents' church nearby.
Doctors - excellent doctors and hospital. A lot of the specialists live in Atlanta but practice here. No traffic problems (opposite commute) and the hospital is a part of the Emory system (excellent healthcare). We were going to have to drive into town for a specialist referral (same campus of the Ebola patients) but the oral surgeon decided to send dad to an ENT instead of the oral surgeons at Emory.
Transportation - there is virtually no public transportation in the south but the world's busiest airport is nearby.

Dukey1

One learns to adapt to new communities, environments, etc., AND the challenges they offer.

WhereAreWe

I moved from Wisconsin to the Mississippi Gulf Coast when I was 24. I had quit my job in Wisconsin and just decided to go somewhere warmer. No job, didn't know anyone and had to have my parents co-sign for a little apartment half a block from the beach.

I made it work but it was a big adjustment. Loved the summers, hated the winters down there (oddly enough). Ultimately I wound up moving back less than 2 years later because I was tired of being poor. I was in line for a promotion and raise at work which fell through at the last minute - if not for that I would've stayed longer. But I simply couldn't keep living there when I had to donate plasma to buy groceries and my budget allowed me exactly $50/month for anything over the basic necessities.

HappyTrvlr

We have moved all over the country and found something good in each place but , of course, missed many things we left behind. It broadened us and when we return to visit friends in those places who have never moved anywhere,they seem so much more provincial. And that's including those living in some of the largest cities in the US. Moving around gives you a peak into another culture and region and their ways of doing and seeing things and I am so glad to have had that opportunity.
One problem is that when you move you are "invisible." And the difficult part is finding new doctors,and dentists and developing a relationship with them. We have invited neighbors over when we moved in to break the ice and meet people. We also look in our college's alumni guide to see if any classmates are in the area and we have reconnected with several that way.
The friendliest welcome we ever received was from the neighbors on either side of us in downtown Chicago, quiet a wonderful surprise.

sunbum1944

When I was 21, I moved from the prairies of Saskatchewan Canada to Honolulu - that was a great and fun move.

Then I moved from Honolulu to Missouri - took a lot of adjusting.

Last move was the hardest- moved from Missouri to Oregon. Both my parents died, lived through a divorce that I did not want, moved across the country all in a 5 year span. It was pretty stressful but have been here over 20 years and doing fine. Would love to downsize and move to something with less yard but thoughts of packing everything up is overwhelming.

I will be doing in the next few years though I am sure- but will stay in the area.