Best advice I heard at a (non-Ivy) tour from Admissions Director. "The most competitive school your child can be offered admission to might not be the best match"

Never in my life have I felt as inadequate intellectually as my first year at an Ivy. Most people who can get admitted to top tier competitive schools are used to finding themselves fairly smart relative to their peers. And often with doing far less work. While if I had it to do over, I would not change where I went to undergraduate school, it is sometimes difficult to find yourself feeling stupid and over-worked as a freshman - and sometimes with relatively poor study habits.

My daughter went to an average college, not the most prestigious she was offered admission to - and thrived.

Just file this in the back of your mind as you navigate the bittersweet college admissions process with your kid.

And keep in mind that the Ivy League started out as a football conference, not a collection of elite schools.

<she once said, "I wish I'd gone to Pomona.">

Well, lucky for him, my son never said that about Stanford - he loved all 4 years of it.

<Never in my life have I felt as inadequate intellectually as my first year at an Ivy>

ditto! (and really, nothing's changed over the 44 years since I graduated )

And keep in mind that the Ivy League started out as a football conference, not a collection of elite schools.

So????

My oldest friend coaches football at one of the Ivies. And he coached some guys who are now in the NFL Hall of Fame.

His opinion, "When I coached at some other places, I had kids who could play that weren't that smart, now I have kids who are really smart, who can't play that well."

No scholarships in the Ivies and no bowl games.

Thanks, marvelousmouse, DD has been an over-achiever since day one. She was accepted at Stanford's vascular surgery residency.

After graduating from JHU, she worked with Teach for America for three years, teaching high school in Richmond, CA. Hopkins encouraged their pre-med students not to go directly to med school, to get some broader experience, like with TFA.

After she got her MD, she earned a Masters in Public Health at UC Berkeley.

Although Harvard Med professes a policy that any student who shows 'one dollar of need' gets their entire financial aid package. Unfortunately, even though med students are adults, HMS looks at parents' income as the first source of funding for students. DD owes so much now, I don't even want to think about it.

"Dd owes so much now, I don't even want to think about it"

Ouch. Yeah, I know what you mean- that would be the main reason I did not go on, I don't even see the light at the end of the tunnel from my undergrad Good for her for sticking with it, though! Did she like TFA?

TFA was an amazing experience for her. Really intense.
Google Richmond, CA, Kennedy High School. She connected with her kids.
TFA sends teachers to challenged schools.

Is Kennedy where Coach Carter taught?

I understand the "high achiever from day 1" comment - mine too (Yale Law School and tons of student debt, but a great job too)

My point about it starting out as a football conference was that there are other comparable schools, equally difficult to get into, that are not called "Ivy League". I have no way of knowing whether or not child of OP is considering any of these. People get hung up on "Ivy League"

sf, I'm sorry, I don't know about Coach Carter. I think DD was there 2011- 2014.

There was an article in a news magazine at that time, that called Richmond, CA, something like the "dropout capital of the US". Only about 30% of students even came to Kennedy HS. It was a tough place. No windows. All cinder block construction. Disgusting water fountains and bathrooms. No toilet paper, ever. Really not a place that stimulated learning.

Several gang killings of students while DD was there. One new sophomore was lured across the street during lunch, and shot dead in retaliation for something his cousin had done. It broke DD's heart everyday. But, she connected with her kids and helped several of them see a way out.

Correction: more like 2007- 2010

sf, I always remember one teacher saying that her A students were not the happy ones. Mostly her more 'average' students were more content. haha. I think she was right, given that the over-achiever is always on to the next quest.

gail, exactly. Schools like JHU and Stanford are not considered Ivies, but are every bit as hard to get into, and every bit as good.

sf, I just googled it, and Coach Carter was at Richmond High School. DD taught at Kennedy High School, in Richmond, CA. Her beau taught at Richmond High, for Teach for America. It was a slightly better school.

Although her beau told of having a sophomore girl confess to him that she had killed someone. It was not an exaggeration. That's how those kids lived. In gangs. They didn't know much more than that. Really pitiful in this country, to have such forgotten children

A couple of notes:

You have compressed these visits into a very short amount of time and will be racing around to take the tours, visit a class or two and then spend even an hour or two in the cities. To make this worthwhile take a lot of notes and photos or it will be just a giant blur at the end.

Not sure where you are rom but these are all places with real winters so be sure the student is prepared for 3 months of cold and snow. (We had a niece visit us from FL and she was freezing in Sept - wanted us to put the heat on - which is not possible.)

We obviously don;t know your child or his/her match to the requirements of the school. Also we don't know what your child's potential majors are - which can really matter.

Also, there are many excellent schools which are not Ivy but essentially just as good academically (if the kids want it). What you will find difference is the connections that the child has later in life.

Our 2 DDs had very similar grades, scores and extracurrics - but decided to go in different directions. Our elder went ivy for both underdgrad and law school (bud different schools). But the younger has very different interests and went to a high quality but not ivy undergrad and a very specialized grad school. They each picked what was right for them because they spent a lot of time looking. And we didn't do a massive tour like this - but had them pick a few schools that they were really interested in.

But mostly, be sure your choices are realistic - both in terms of your child's records and your ability to fulfill the financial requirements. Remember that while there are many scholarships - room and board is still very expensive. And then there are the daily expenses.

You will not need a rental car to visit any of those particular Ivies. You can fly into BOS and after visiting Harvard in Cambridge, take Amtrak to Providence for Brown. Then take Amtrak to New Haven for Yale. Amtrak then to NYC's Penn Station for Columbia. Then go to Penn Station for a NJ Transit train to Princeton Junction. Then take the Dinky into Princeton. After Princeton take Dinky back to Princeton Junction and take Amtrak to Philly for the interview at Penn. Then take public transport to PHL to fly home. You can also do this in reverse landing at PHL and returning at BOS.

Obviously, you will have to pick where you spend overnights on this trip. Ask the schools' admissions office for hotel recommendations and special pricing. Then go from there.

The one wrench to this is a major snow storm.

You could do this in many different ways. One can stay in NYC and do day trips to Penn, Princeton, Yale. Train to Brown than onto Boston. Reverse if you want.
Could also start in Boston and move on south or start in Philadelphia and move north. Hotels most expensive in NYC and Boston. What do you expect to pay for lodgings? The Universities should have a list of close hotels and costs for you.

My niece is a high school guidance counselor and she works hard to get all her students into college. She worked hours last year helping one that did get into West Point. She also knows how much it cost and even with scholarships has a payment book for her masters that won't be paid off for years. It is a horrible the amount of debt that a student graduates with and the lack of good paying jobs to make ends meet. She has a car payment, house payment and her student loan payment.
I love that in Fl you can duel enroll and get an jump start on required courses. So many enroll in college already a Jr.

Off subject, sorry.

John Jeffries house by Mass General is a deal. Great location and can't beat the price.

>>>The best deal in the country right now is at Stanford. Any student who qualifies for admission and whose family earns less than $125,000 goes tuition free.>>assume an entering freshman class of 1600. First, half of them will be the "other" gender, leaving 800. Then, a certain number will be legacies, so down to maybe 600 or 700. Then remove the athletes.

Stanford has a basic rule about family income, which eliminates the anxiety, while the others have possibilities. The Ivies still admit some students as well.

IDH --

>>>The Ivies still admit some students as well.

Fra

Although what I wrote is funnier and more ironic than I intended, I meant to write the Ivies still admit legacies.
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