I have to say this is an eyeopening thread for me. I have never been on an ocean cruise but I have taken many river cruises. Now that I think about it, the single people were welcome in all the group activities on those cruises. I would say I have been on 10 of these and although I was not solo we made friends with many of the single people on board.

On my very first of these cruises there was one single woman and I did notice she was looked upon strangely by many couples so I made a point of talking to her and we became friends on the trip.

On all the rest of the cruises, the singles seemed to stick together or with some of the couples, including us.

Maybe river cruises are different because mostly we are there to learn something and go to lectures and are interested in the sites and history. I would think an ocean cruise would be more for partying? I am not sure.

As a solo person, I have been much more often "adopted" by a couple, than I have hooked up with another single person.

Suze, it's probably more accurate to say that as a solo <i>woman</i> you have been adopted by a couple. I doubt many couples &quot;adopt&quot; solo men, although anything is possible.

JB, you're right. Suze, I don't think you'd be &quot;adopted&quot; if you were a solo man...lol. I think it all boils down to the fact that women enjoy talking to other women and men have no problem approaching a woman if they think she's not with another man. Therefore, the solo traveling female is always going to make friends much easier than the solo man. Does anyone know of any other trips that are good for solo men, where we have the option, but not the obligation, to hang out with other solos?

Good points. I was thinking about one of the river trips, perhaps in Germany. There was a single man and I do think he was maybe not avoided but left out, until word got around that he was a recent widow, then he was accepted in different &quot;groups&quot; of people who had bonded.

Also he was very intelligent and held a good conversation, clever and witty, in other words he brought something to the table with him. He was the same man but now people accepted him.

I see now it would be more difficult for the solo man, very interesting.

stocktrader, men enjoy talking with other men, too. The problem is that too many men might assume that a strange man who approaches them is interested in something more than merely talking. It's sort of a primal fear for many men.

Yes, it's easy to approach women who appear single. I did that at the buffet on my cruise. If I saw a woman sitting alone at a table, I would simply walk up to her table with my food and ask if I could join her. Invariably the response would be a cold stare and &quot;my husband (or boyfriend) is getting his lunch.&quot; Only in hindsight did I realize that they were most likely just telling me the truth.

I have no idea what might be good trips for solo men, except for making a general a statement that any trip a man decides to take by himself is a good trip. However, in my research I have found a number of companies that offer trips for solo travelers. They still price everything double occupancy and you share with a stranger if you don't bring your own roommate-- they're merely reselling space on tours and cruises and are stuck with the Noah's Ark Law under which their suppliers operate.

But the interesting thing is that the tour membership is invariably overwhelmingly female. You'd think that would be a self-correcting situation, since a man who signs up should find himself in a very desirable situation. But apparently it isn't. One of those companies (O Solo Mio) speculates it's because women &quot;enjoy the social aspects of touring&quot; while men &quot;prefer independence.&quot; My own theory is that women in general are more inclined to travel than men. It's also possible that the reality of being one of the few men in an overwhelmingly female group is more of a nightmare than a dream, but I have no personal experience with such things.

However, if having a group of single people available on your trip is important, I'd suspect the only way to get that is to go with a singles group. Failing that, perhaps a travel agent experienced with solo and single travelers (a very rare &quot;niche&quot; specialty that's very hard to find) might suggest a tour or destination likely to attract some proportion of singles. The most practical approach, however, is to just go to whatever place interests you the most and don't worry about finding other singles to hang out with. If meeting other singles really is that important, research the dating bars and singles activities at your destination and hang out with locals.

To me the travel is what's important not meeting people. So I plan my own trips and actually prefer not to meet up with strangers to destinations that I want to see.

Now if you want to be around other singles with built-in socializing, I'm guessing a singles cruise or singles tour group would be worth looking into. Perhaps one that is activities-based like white water rafting or something?

JB, funny you mention the part about approaching a woman at the buffet on your cruise. It was a similar circumstance that happened to me on a cruise that made me vow to start searching online for singles cruises. Believe it or not, I was so ignorant, I never even knew such a thing as singles cruises existed..lol.

I would actually LOVE to travel alone more often, but I just do NOT want to be around a bunch of couples. I wouldn't care if I went in a group of other solo and/or single travelers who never even wanted to talk to me. I just can't stand being given those pained looks from people as if I'm some wierdo/odd man out or being told how &quot;brave&quot; I am for traveling alone. I've even been asked why I couldn't find someone to travel with me and/or why I wasn't married! lol I don't want to have to &quot;explain&quot; myself or my life's story just because I decided to travel alone.

I was going to suggest that you might want to look at tour companies that require sharing rather than paying a single supplement. But then I remembered the discussion at the top of the thread. Since I don't mind sharing, I've found this to be a great way to have people around when you want them, but still be able to go off on your own. These days I usually only use them when I'm going somewhere where public transport is problematic, but then I really don't have a problem being on my own.

stocktrader, if you really would love to travel alone away from couples, the simple and obvious thing is to forget about group tours or cruises and take true solo trips. As you're now painfully aware, if you take a tour or a cruise you're going to be surrounded by couples and families since that's the main market for those products. But if you go where you want by yourself, you won't have that problem. You stand a good chance of being entirely by yourself the whole time, which can be good, bad, or somewhere in between. If you must be part of a group, the only way to avoid the sea of couples and families is a singles tour or cruise. But you know that.

Besides the need to share your accommodations with a total stranger, the real problem with singles travel is that it's rather limited. Companies that resell space to groups of singles currently offer only a minuscule subset of all the tours and cruises available for couples and families. The number of offerings is likely to expand greatly in the future. Many single people want to travel, and organizers that market to groups of singles and pair them up as roommates seem to provide the packaged travel industry's only alternative to paying double for the privilege of being ignored and ostracized.

Again, the other alternative already exists-- put those slick brochures in the recycle bin and travel independently. If you're afraid to do that (and a great many single people are, but don't admit it), there are other posts in this forum about dealing with that. I don't really enjoy traveling alone, but it's (usually) better than staying home alone. Once I finally get my sorry arse out the door, I usually have a pretty good time.

You seem to have had better luck talking to couples than I do. While I've had the &quot;compliments&quot; about my bravery, I've never had anyone ask me why I was alone or not married (although that's a common &quot;audit&quot; question on blind dates from personal ads). Usually they just ignore me. At least they talk to you enough to reach the point where they feel they can demand an explanation for your strangeness!

When you are traveling alone in major cities (Europe works nicely) people don't know you are alone or not. With the possible exception of sitting in a restaurants, I guess.

When you truly go solo there aren't other couples around looking at you one way or the other, like you might experience in a tour group. Walking down the street in Paris, believe me no one will think twice that a man is walking alone, or wonder why he's not married, etc. etc. Just doesn't happen. Give it a try, why not?

Suze, how true. In cities, who knows what your story is? Business men and women travel solo all the time and are most likely thinking of their business at hand and not thinking of what a couple is thinking of them.

I too encourage you to take the step and go to some European cities on your own, it is liberating, you'll see.
There is so much help waiting for you on this board too, go over to Europe forum and ask whatever you like, believe me!

I will third that!

I think part of the fear of traveling solo is that paranoia that everyone is judging you. On a cruise, I think it's possible to get some judging because you're &quot;pushed together&quot; at meals, etc.

When you travel independently, you're not forced into situations where you're the &quot;odd man or woman out&quot;. People on the street are busy with their own lives and aren't gawking and laughing because &quot;look, (s)he's traveling alone!&quot;

Once you get past that paranoia (which is common and normal), it's liberating.

People in Amsterdam, Paris, Venice, London (for examplle) most likely don't care about you I mean this in the kindest, most gentle way). Unless you go out of your way to approach total strangers, no one will pay you any mind, or at least that has been my experience solo in the above cities.

Of course, in Asia you'll be very noticeable (unless, maybe, you're of the same heritage), and people may well think it's strange that you're on your own, but you'll still get good treatment.

I know where you are coming from. I have traveled as a single, as a wife and as a widow. I have enjoyed the company of many age groups, and I have seen every combination of mother/daughter, sisters, brothers, friends, whatever wanting to get away. It is definitely more fun to get away &quot;together&quot;, but often getting away &quot;alone&quot; is the only cure for the need to relive those great times on the road or on the sea! Right now, I am looking to drive through the Southern half of Ireland in Aug/Sept. I haven't been quite this brave before, but they speak English and use the Euro. How bad can it be? I have been reading, quickly, since this is somewhat of a last-minute idea. Does anyone know if I rent a car in Dublin and follow a map and stay in B&amp;Bs and such, if I will be okay? I want to be, but I know I also need to be realistic and aware of the real world out there.

Travelgirl - that sounds like a GREAT trip! A friend just came back from Ireland and I asked him about the driving and he said as soon as he adjusted to the other side of the road, it was no problem.

As a solo traveler, I would keep a little &quot;emergency&quot; packet together in the car. Include emergency numbers, roadside service info, a few snacks, some water, small change for a phone call in necessary. This can easily be put together when you arrive in Ireland.

I have never heard of Ireland being &quot;dangerous&quot; for a solo traveler, so I don't think you'll have any problems (however those with more personal experience can give you better advice on that). If you're concerned about safety in the B&amp;B rooms, pick up a cheap rubber door stop. You can put it under the door at night for added security.

Other than that, just use common sense, schedule driving time for daylight hours so you don't get lost in the middle of the night, and enjoy yourself!

I (Mom) and college-age daughter went to Ireland at Christmas-time, about 4 years ago. I drove from Dublin to Sligo--my first driving on the left side of the road. Got used to that pretty fast. We were warned by a shopkeeper in a small town outside Kilkenny not to go hiking alone in the countryside - something I would have done - as there was an increase in robberies of women out about at night walking about by themselves, or hiking to sites. It was good advise. People are so friendly everywhere in Ireland, one might drop their travel saavy a bit. You can rent cars at the Dublin Airport. I used Budget. Not good there. First car they gave me, wouldn't start. Since I had reserved an automatic--figured learning to drive on the left would be hard enough without having it be a manual too--they took me to a car with 4 smashed in ends. It was a bit of adventure dealing with them but won't take up this post with that tale. They did not keep up their cars well. I checked the oil when I left and did fill it. I later spoke with a student of mine who goes to Ireland every year. Wherever she rented the car from, it blew up on the way out of the rental. Don't let that stop you from renting. You need it go get around. The corners can be tight when driving in some places and the lanes small, so it's a good idea to rent a car where the outside mirrors can pull in. That came in really handy. We did everything on the spur - no reservations anywhere till end of our trip at Castle Sligo. That worked out well as it was winter, though most B&amp;B's were closed as it was Christmas. I did find that the books were right about the people not knowing names of streets--I'd end up going back to the car to bring in the map and even major roads--they did not know how to direct me to. It was go past Bob's house at the corner, then ..... by the time they were done, it was out my brain, but I'd manage to find my way back. I loved it there. Those were little bumps. Friendliest people going. I did find that though I would think I could remember my way back to something I'd pass, it would get confusing and I'd not find it again. Driving on the left was easier to learn then I thought. Spend a couple of days sitting behind the taxi driver and mentally drive - and you will get used to visually seeing the cars come at you that way. By the time I rented a car, the only thing left to adapt to was keeping to the road line on the right. Having my daughter there to remind me I was driving to the left for the first 1.5 hours did the trick. After that I was fine. The roundabouts were single lanes and much easier to deal with then Australia's double lane round abouts for me. All in all, it was an adventure I'd repeat in a heartbeat. The people are great. You'll have a grand time. One more tip, if you stay at a lodging with a pub, make sure you don't get a room over the pub. Ask for a room as far away from the pub as you can get. Wish I'd known that before renting a room. It was above the pub. I didn't realize what that would mean. The music went on till 2 pm and I had to get up at 5 to try to outdrive an incoming snow storm and by the time I called the desk clerk to ask for a different room, it was too late. The place was full (or so he said). Every trip will have its little bumps and the things you learn. I had the grandest time there seeing things and meeting people who will chat your ear off every where you go in the nicest way. Another tourist I chatted with there who goes every year recommended driving through Ireland in the off-season as the roads won't be as crowded. I wouldn't recommend Christmastime though - most things are shut down at Christmas, even Dublin. But that's another story.