Dining alone
#101
Joined: Sep 2008
Posts: 2,804
Likes: 0
I love eating solo---especially here in NY. It always feels like I'm "treating" myself.
Anyway, a quick solo dining travel story. I went to Ireland several years ago with a group of friends---we were in college and were therefore really trying to get by on very little money. Ten days into the trip, I was dying for a "real meal"--not fast food, not a baguette, not cheese (this was basically all we were eating).
One night in Galway, the group of us called it an early night; wanting some real alone time I headed out for a walk. I stumbled on a candlelit restaurant with a 3-part jazz band. Ten minutes after I sat down, the place filled up; a couple came and asked if they could sit with me. They were obviously on a date and did not know each other very well. Over the next hour we talked on and off--I was drawing the majority of the time in a notebook I always carry with me. We talked about my drawings and they gave me advice on what I should when I graduated. Occasionally the three of us would slip into a comfortable silence and then they would begin talking again, just the two of them.
Anyway, it's hard to explain but there was something sort of enchanting about the night-- it definitely made me feel empowered to strike out on my own again.
I really enjoy meeting people randomly like this. My personal favorite solo dining tip is to consider sitting at the bar if you're interested in interacting with others. I've heard some interesting stories this way...
Anyway, a quick solo dining travel story. I went to Ireland several years ago with a group of friends---we were in college and were therefore really trying to get by on very little money. Ten days into the trip, I was dying for a "real meal"--not fast food, not a baguette, not cheese (this was basically all we were eating).
One night in Galway, the group of us called it an early night; wanting some real alone time I headed out for a walk. I stumbled on a candlelit restaurant with a 3-part jazz band. Ten minutes after I sat down, the place filled up; a couple came and asked if they could sit with me. They were obviously on a date and did not know each other very well. Over the next hour we talked on and off--I was drawing the majority of the time in a notebook I always carry with me. We talked about my drawings and they gave me advice on what I should when I graduated. Occasionally the three of us would slip into a comfortable silence and then they would begin talking again, just the two of them.
Anyway, it's hard to explain but there was something sort of enchanting about the night-- it definitely made me feel empowered to strike out on my own again.
I really enjoy meeting people randomly like this. My personal favorite solo dining tip is to consider sitting at the bar if you're interested in interacting with others. I've heard some interesting stories this way...
#104




Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 84,801
Likes: 46
LOL, hipvirgochick!
I didn't realize that this was such a hard thing to do for some folks, until my BF shared that she went out to dinner ALONE for the first time near her lake house. At 62, she worked up the courage - and had a great time. This is not a shy person - at all
I suppose it never occured to me because of years of solo travel for work. I don't think men worry about this. I agree that no one is "looking at you" in a negative way and that there's no reason to be apologetic for eating solo. I people-watch mostly. Sometimes I take in a Sudoku puzzle or a paper to journal while I'm waiting for my order.
But, kudos to all who step out of their comfort zone to enjoy a solo dinner in a nice restaurant.
I didn't realize that this was such a hard thing to do for some folks, until my BF shared that she went out to dinner ALONE for the first time near her lake house. At 62, she worked up the courage - and had a great time. This is not a shy person - at all

I suppose it never occured to me because of years of solo travel for work. I don't think men worry about this. I agree that no one is "looking at you" in a negative way and that there's no reason to be apologetic for eating solo. I people-watch mostly. Sometimes I take in a Sudoku puzzle or a paper to journal while I'm waiting for my order.
But, kudos to all who step out of their comfort zone to enjoy a solo dinner in a nice restaurant.
#105
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 10,190
Likes: 0
Starrs - I wouldn't have thought men worried about it either, but it you read back through JBHapgood's posts, you'll find that men are as insecure as we women are regarding solo travel, solo dining, etc. Who would of thunk?
#106
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 2
Likes: 0
I was dining by myself in Paris a few years ago and was very happily reading a newspaper in between courses. I heard a discreet shout of alarm from the waiter ("Sacre bleu!" ...not really, but something like that), and then noticed that the candle on my little table had ignited the newspaper. I quickly put it out, but it did somewhat change the whole comfortable idea of eating by myself that night.
I still like dining alone though...
I still like dining alone though...
#107
Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 26,390
Likes: 0
Good story steve.
There are times when I eat lunch alone and enjoy it.
What caught my eye upthread was the idea of not wanting the waitstaff to think I'm "water and salad" person.
I rarely drink and there isn't much else on the menu besides water that I enjoy. As boring as it may sound, I drink mainly water. A hot cup of herbal tea sometimes but rarely do restuarants offer a good decaf tea.
I've ordered plain water in many places and no one has ever batted an eye.
There are times when I eat lunch alone and enjoy it.
What caught my eye upthread was the idea of not wanting the waitstaff to think I'm "water and salad" person.
I rarely drink and there isn't much else on the menu besides water that I enjoy. As boring as it may sound, I drink mainly water. A hot cup of herbal tea sometimes but rarely do restuarants offer a good decaf tea.
I've ordered plain water in many places and no one has ever batted an eye.
#108
Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 6,425
Likes: 0
Wow - this is an old thread!!!
I travel for work a lot and if I am not w clients I dont mind eating alone. I am more comfortable in the Hotel restaurant though. I do love to see what the local cuisne is and get there early - 6ish - and go back to the hotel and watch a movie!!
I remember one of my best solo meals at a Tapas restaurant and I sat at the bar and met another solo female diner and we had a ball! Drank wine - split a desert and talked for hours!
I travel for work a lot and if I am not w clients I dont mind eating alone. I am more comfortable in the Hotel restaurant though. I do love to see what the local cuisne is and get there early - 6ish - and go back to the hotel and watch a movie!!
I remember one of my best solo meals at a Tapas restaurant and I sat at the bar and met another solo female diner and we had a ball! Drank wine - split a desert and talked for hours!
#111
Joined: Feb 2012
Posts: 7
Likes: 0
I eat out alone quite often. Yeah bringing a magazine or a book is a good idea if you're self-conscious! But I'm so used to it now, I rather enjoy people-watching and having some quality time alone. I suggest everyone to take yourself out to dinner at least once in your life.
P.S. It might be a funny idea if you sit at a table for two and pretend to be speaking to your "invisible" dinner partner opposite you during your meal, preferably with other couples around.
Whisper sweet nothings and offer a toast to your "invisible" man and maybe giggle at times at the funny stuff "he" says. Etc. Anyone game to try this? Hahaha!
P.S. It might be a funny idea if you sit at a table for two and pretend to be speaking to your "invisible" dinner partner opposite you during your meal, preferably with other couples around.
Whisper sweet nothings and offer a toast to your "invisible" man and maybe giggle at times at the funny stuff "he" says. Etc. Anyone game to try this? Hahaha!




