I am hoping that among the forum users someone will know of the place I am about to describe.
We we would like to find a spot that fits most if not all our check boxes for an ideal Caribbean vacation'
Here is a list of what we hope to find:

We do not like crowds or nightlife so prefer it not highly commercialized therefore relatively uncrowded.
Rental of a house rather than a hotel
Great snorkeling accessible just off the beach without needing to book snorkeling "tours"
No need of a captains licences to rent your own boat.
Golf cart rental for local exploration
At least a simple grocery store to purchase food to do your own cooking rather than eating in restaurants
Friendly locals willing to help you learn the island



Any suggestions that fit at least most of these check boxes would be appreciated.

Thanks!

Also look at St. John in the Virgin Islands.

Your requirement for using a golf cart for transportation is going to significantly limit you choose of destinations as, quite frankly, they are not a viable means of transportation or even available on most islands. If that's important to you check out Harbour Island in the Bahamas as that's one place where golf carts are used by tourists and locals alike.

If you can do without the golf cart check out rental villas on Virgin Gorda's Mahoe Bay - very quite and small enclave of privately owner rental villas on one of the islands best beaches with a fantastic "triple" snorkeling reef that runs the entire length of the 3/4 mile long beach that begins just 50' or so off-shore. You can snorkel there for hours and not see everything. Virgin Gorda offers everything else on your wish list.

Again, no golf carts, but I agree with with schmerl that St. John is a good option for you.

Also, check out rental villas on Bequia, Mayreau and Canouan in the Grenadines or, if you have a very big budget on Mustique (also in the Grenadines). No golf carts but on Mustique Mini-Mokes are the primary means of transportation. All are very quiet islands and will fulfill your wish list.

General observations only to your questions...

Some of your wishes are easy - like having a grocery store, renting a house instead of hotel, friendly locals, those items are a snap most places.

But not as common - golf carts for transportation, renting a boat without a license, snorkeling directly off a beach (you don't need a tour but you usually do need to get out further from shore for reefs).

I know you asked about the Caribbean but golf carts are available on Isla Mujeres. It's a 20 minute ferry ride from Cancun. Can't speak about a lot of your other criteria, but you may want to research it some to see if it fits your needs. We stayed four four nights a couple years back and loved it. It's a small island and exploring it using a golf cart was a lot of fun.

I thought of Isla Mujeres as well, tom42. Mexico is often a great suggestion that people don't think of. And I know about the golf carts -haha.

Having never been I didn't know if it fit the no crowds, not commercialized, no nightlife part of this request??

We stayedon North Beach which is more developed and has reataurants and shops within walking distance of the hotels and condos. That was a big plus for me but probably not want the OP is looking for. However, as you go south on the island, it becomes less developed so if the OP was interested, that's the part of the island that might fit her needs.

Yes, I've heard that. I didn't snorkel while there. I don't think there is any island that will meet all of the criteria the OP listed.

I agree. Too bad timb has not returned to comment on the posts and suggestions made.

I think as often happens there is a discrepancy when wanting some things for convenience (golf carts, grocery store) yet wanting the isolation of not having other tourists around.

Snorkeling off shore is just a matter of where there are things to see under water. And as far as someone letting you rent a boat without a license... well...

St John was my first thought.
Not golf carts that I experienced, but Grand Cayman has many condos and you can snorkel from shore and so many other places.

I am going to follow along. I am also looking....finally think I have it narrowed down. Cayman Islands or Turks and Caicos.

Saint Lucia! Hands down, especially if you love stunningly beautiful, lush green scenery. Check Oprah's magazine of a few years ago presenting the fifty (50) most beautiful places to visit before you die and you will see that the Soufriere region of St. Lucia, not only made her list, BUT WAS NUMBER ONE!
The only negative is that golf carts are not allowed on public roads and neither would you want that.

Another vote for St. Lucia. I miss it! I need to go back. Instead of golf carts, take water taxis wherever you want to go.

Golf carts make me think of Hilton Head Island and Tybee Island in the SE USA.