Travel really does make a difference
Jan 10th, 2010, 02:15 AM
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Travel really does make a difference
Some of you may remember me from a while back. I was living in Barcelona and traveling whenever I got the chance. However, this message is for any person posting to Fodor's and is to say the travel really makes a difference, in your life and in those who share it with you.
I am from Dallas, TX, and my parents are not widely traveled folks. In 2003 my father was diagnosed with liver cancer. This was the last of his 3 primary cancers, and he fought strong for over 5 years.
In December of 2006 he came to visit me in Barcelona and I wanted so much to give him something that he would never see anywhere else. So, I took him to Turkey, where I knew we would see things from centuries he thought only existed in books.
We did, he did, and fast forward to 2009 when he passed away, it was still a highlight in his life. I have traveled so much that it seems like a small thing to go to Turkey. Nothing seems far to me. "Old" is interesting, but does not silence me like it did when I took my first trip across the pond.
At my father's memorial service we put up a slide show of photos. All of them got some kind of comment, but the one of us in Turkey caused a genuine stir. Suddenly my Dad was seen as someone who had "been somewhere."
So, to those of us who are lucky enough to travel (once, twice, every year, whenever), remember that it is something to be loved and cherished and respected. My Dad was a worldly man even before he ever left the US, but that opportunity gave him some sort of street cred and legitimacy that he could not have gotten otherwise.
In the end, I guess what I want to say is enjoy where you go. Share it with others. Whether they react with jealousy, interest, happiness or frustration, know that you are doing something that is still not possible for many and the more you share, the more they know.
Enjoy your trip, and if you have someone in your life you can take with you, do it. What my father and I had in Turkey is what dries my tears right now. May we all have something that can do that.
Love,
laclaire
I am from Dallas, TX, and my parents are not widely traveled folks. In 2003 my father was diagnosed with liver cancer. This was the last of his 3 primary cancers, and he fought strong for over 5 years.
In December of 2006 he came to visit me in Barcelona and I wanted so much to give him something that he would never see anywhere else. So, I took him to Turkey, where I knew we would see things from centuries he thought only existed in books.
We did, he did, and fast forward to 2009 when he passed away, it was still a highlight in his life. I have traveled so much that it seems like a small thing to go to Turkey. Nothing seems far to me. "Old" is interesting, but does not silence me like it did when I took my first trip across the pond.
At my father's memorial service we put up a slide show of photos. All of them got some kind of comment, but the one of us in Turkey caused a genuine stir. Suddenly my Dad was seen as someone who had "been somewhere."
So, to those of us who are lucky enough to travel (once, twice, every year, whenever), remember that it is something to be loved and cherished and respected. My Dad was a worldly man even before he ever left the US, but that opportunity gave him some sort of street cred and legitimacy that he could not have gotten otherwise.
In the end, I guess what I want to say is enjoy where you go. Share it with others. Whether they react with jealousy, interest, happiness or frustration, know that you are doing something that is still not possible for many and the more you share, the more they know.
Enjoy your trip, and if you have someone in your life you can take with you, do it. What my father and I had in Turkey is what dries my tears right now. May we all have something that can do that.
Love,
laclaire
Jan 10th, 2010, 02:25 AM
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laclaire I am sorry for your loss and I totally agree with you. Travel does give your life a different dimension.
I read somewhere a few years ago that 80% of US senators don't have and have never had a passport. I wonder how different the US would be if those who make the decisions had travelled and been exposed to other cultures, points of view etc.
I'm so pleased you had that time with your father, those happy memories will always be precious and as you say they dry your tears.
I read somewhere a few years ago that 80% of US senators don't have and have never had a passport. I wonder how different the US would be if those who make the decisions had travelled and been exposed to other cultures, points of view etc.
I'm so pleased you had that time with your father, those happy memories will always be precious and as you say they dry your tears.
Jan 10th, 2010, 03:25 AM
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Dear Claire,
What a lovely post. I am sorry about the loss of your Dad.
I had always liked to travel but as I got older I became very afraid of flying and so had not seen very much of the world outside the US aside from a few typical trips - Paris, London, Greece....
Several years ago I went back to school and became an oncology nurse. I was a bit old for this - 44! I saw a lot of death in my job. People often shared the important things they had done in their life as they became close to death and one thing that stuck in my mind was that people were often so glad they had taken the time to travel.
When the opportunity arose 3 years ago to move to Switzerland with my husband and children I decided it was time to finally see the world. And I really have...I have traveled so many places. I take some medication on the flights and I do just fine now. My world (and that of my family) has opened up so much. My oldest daughter just started college and she plans to enter the Foreign Service after - something she never would have even thought about before. She and her sister have traveled a lot for sports and music through their international school. I can't believe sometimes the opportunities they have had at such a young age! My younger daughter and I will spend 3 weeks this summer in Tanzania volunteering - we did the same last summer. If you asked me 5 years ago if I ever saw myself there I would have said "never!"
In March I'll go to Istanbul (finally) with my older daughter. I will think about what you wrote here about your Dad I'm sure. And next month I'll spend some time in Barcelona with my younger daughter... I'll think of you there too.
Thank you for sharing such a sweet memory with us. You are a wonderful writer too...
gruezi
What a lovely post. I am sorry about the loss of your Dad.
I had always liked to travel but as I got older I became very afraid of flying and so had not seen very much of the world outside the US aside from a few typical trips - Paris, London, Greece....
Several years ago I went back to school and became an oncology nurse. I was a bit old for this - 44! I saw a lot of death in my job. People often shared the important things they had done in their life as they became close to death and one thing that stuck in my mind was that people were often so glad they had taken the time to travel.
When the opportunity arose 3 years ago to move to Switzerland with my husband and children I decided it was time to finally see the world. And I really have...I have traveled so many places. I take some medication on the flights and I do just fine now. My world (and that of my family) has opened up so much. My oldest daughter just started college and she plans to enter the Foreign Service after - something she never would have even thought about before. She and her sister have traveled a lot for sports and music through their international school. I can't believe sometimes the opportunities they have had at such a young age! My younger daughter and I will spend 3 weeks this summer in Tanzania volunteering - we did the same last summer. If you asked me 5 years ago if I ever saw myself there I would have said "never!"
In March I'll go to Istanbul (finally) with my older daughter. I will think about what you wrote here about your Dad I'm sure. And next month I'll spend some time in Barcelona with my younger daughter... I'll think of you there too.
Thank you for sharing such a sweet memory with us. You are a wonderful writer too...
gruezi
Jan 10th, 2010, 07:47 AM
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When my father passed away, one thing that stuck with me were many unrealized travel plans. He was treating trips as something to do after everything else were bought and done. That time never came.
Jan 10th, 2010, 09:34 AM
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Hi Laclaire!
I am sorry to hear about your father. I remember your trip with your father and it is wonderful that it had such an impact on him. Your own joy about your adopted city was contagious and I am sure it had a big effect on your father and your travels with him.
Does this mean you are not in Barcelona any longer?
I am sorry to hear about your father. I remember your trip with your father and it is wonderful that it had such an impact on him. Your own joy about your adopted city was contagious and I am sure it had a big effect on your father and your travels with him.
Does this mean you are not in Barcelona any longer?
Jan 11th, 2010, 07:09 AM
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The 80% of Senators not having passports figure seems questionable to me given the amount of foreign travel they do. Of course, until recently American citizens could travel to most of the countries in North America and the Caribbean without a passport, but the figure for Senators still seems a bit suspicious.
Jan 12th, 2010, 10:42 AM
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laclaire...
I'm so sorry for your loss. I whole heartedly agree with your post.
My parents retired and a week after moving to a warmer climate in the southern US my dad had a stroke, not completely debilitating, but retirement was not what had been envisioned.
Fast forward 11 years and my dad passed away, he hung on longer than any doctors predicted, IMO mostly because of the care and support he received from my mom, who not only cared for him, but worked full time too! My dad has been gone for just over 2 years and although he is missed, mom and I have been creating lots of travel memories...in those 2 years we've criss-crossed the US visiting favorite cities and seeing new ones and jumped the pond to Europe 4 times in 2 years with 2 more European adventures planned for this year. I cherish every minute of those trips with her...memories I will have for a lifetime!
I'm so sorry for your loss. I whole heartedly agree with your post.
My parents retired and a week after moving to a warmer climate in the southern US my dad had a stroke, not completely debilitating, but retirement was not what had been envisioned.
Fast forward 11 years and my dad passed away, he hung on longer than any doctors predicted, IMO mostly because of the care and support he received from my mom, who not only cared for him, but worked full time too! My dad has been gone for just over 2 years and although he is missed, mom and I have been creating lots of travel memories...in those 2 years we've criss-crossed the US visiting favorite cities and seeing new ones and jumped the pond to Europe 4 times in 2 years with 2 more European adventures planned for this year. I cherish every minute of those trips with her...memories I will have for a lifetime!
Jan 12th, 2010, 11:04 AM
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Thank you for posting Laclaire, glad that you were able to do that trip with your Dad. There is no price that can be put on good memories.
I've taken my parents to Ireland, Austria, and Paris. I know they enjoyed them, even though they are not the effusive types. Now, with Dad having Alzheimer's and tiring easiy, those days are over. Now it's more getting them to Florida or Arizona for a winter break, and the trips are more about helping Mom get some "time off".
I have a few friends who are the "too many other expenses" or'When we retire" types and, while I understand it, I can't help but think "if not now..".
I get excited when someone I know is going on a trip because I like to help and talk about travel. I could never imagine a time I will not want to travel. But, I must say, a good travel companion, is priceless.
Travel has changed my life, I hope I can convince others to take the plunge also. But I'm still not sure about Yemen in March.
I've taken my parents to Ireland, Austria, and Paris. I know they enjoyed them, even though they are not the effusive types. Now, with Dad having Alzheimer's and tiring easiy, those days are over. Now it's more getting them to Florida or Arizona for a winter break, and the trips are more about helping Mom get some "time off".
I have a few friends who are the "too many other expenses" or'When we retire" types and, while I understand it, I can't help but think "if not now..".
I get excited when someone I know is going on a trip because I like to help and talk about travel. I could never imagine a time I will not want to travel. But, I must say, a good travel companion, is priceless.
Travel has changed my life, I hope I can convince others to take the plunge also. But I'm still not sure about Yemen in March.
Jan 12th, 2010, 11:53 AM
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Claire.. so happy to read your post title and see you have "returned", although with compassionate sorrow as my father also passed away in the past few years and things haven't been the same since.
Thanks for posting such lovely thoughts, and it is so good to have you back. Are you still in Barcelona?
Thanks for posting such lovely thoughts, and it is so good to have you back. Are you still in Barcelona?
Jan 12th, 2010, 06:08 PM
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I'm sorry for your loss, laclaire. My parents also deferred traveling until late in life, but fortunately had enough time to see quite a few of the places on their wish list. They are both still with us, but in my mom's case she is extremely limited now, and I find it strangely comforting to remember that she went to Macchu Pichu when she was 80. I know she would have liked to keep on seeing the world, but I'm so glad that they were able to see as much as they did, and to share it with us. I think one of the things she regretted was that we weren't able to travel as a family (the finances just weren't there when we were growing up) and that is a major reason why we are trying to travel with our kids - not as often as I would like (the finances aren't here either!) but we are definitely not waiting for "someday" to arrive.
Jan 12th, 2010, 06:41 PM
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laclaire, thank you so much for your honest and inspiring post. I am so sorry for your loss. The fact that you were able to share such a wonderful travel experience with your father before he died is simply priceless.
I had the good fortune to live in Germany for over 2 years. I kept a journal of my experiences and travels, sending it out monthly to my friends and family. I had a few people admit that they didn't want to read it because they were jealous. Most of them eventually started reading it, and in the end they thanked me because they so enjoyed the vicarious experience of my travels.
Those of us who are lucky enough to travel or live abroad know that it opens your mind in a thousand different ways. Sharing it with others - even if it can only be through our stories - is a special part of the experience and an important way to keep the memories alive.
I had the good fortune to live in Germany for over 2 years. I kept a journal of my experiences and travels, sending it out monthly to my friends and family. I had a few people admit that they didn't want to read it because they were jealous. Most of them eventually started reading it, and in the end they thanked me because they so enjoyed the vicarious experience of my travels.
Those of us who are lucky enough to travel or live abroad know that it opens your mind in a thousand different ways. Sharing it with others - even if it can only be through our stories - is a special part of the experience and an important way to keep the memories alive.
Jan 18th, 2010, 01:48 PM
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All,
I am just now getting to read these replies and I really appreciate them.
Lincasanova, to answer your question, I am no longer in BCN. My visa ran out in April of 08 and with my Dad being ill and my man wanting to live in an English-speaking country, we decided to move to the US. I am happy to say, though, that San Francisco is a great place to be and I have been able to do a ton of trips around the US, and to Australia and back to BCN. More to come, I am sure, though the truth is many are business trips, which lose their luster after the first few.
Thank you, all, and keep traveling!
I am just now getting to read these replies and I really appreciate them.
Lincasanova, to answer your question, I am no longer in BCN. My visa ran out in April of 08 and with my Dad being ill and my man wanting to live in an English-speaking country, we decided to move to the US. I am happy to say, though, that San Francisco is a great place to be and I have been able to do a ton of trips around the US, and to Australia and back to BCN. More to come, I am sure, though the truth is many are business trips, which lose their luster after the first few.
Thank you, all, and keep traveling!
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