threatening, scary response

Old Nov 13th, 2001, 09:31 AM
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I have learned to let the obvious insulting posts roll of my back - they remind me of someone who doesn't know how to swim and is drowning. The best thing you can do is keep your distance. While words are powerful tools / weapons - it might be helpful to remember that we are all fairly safe from really being attacked being that were all sitting in front of our computers. Didn't we all suffer worse in high school?

I don't feel comfortable icluding my email - but have no problem using my name. This does personalize my post which does allow for someone to single me out. The person going by the name "notme" is in someways unattached to his / her post and thus singling "notme" out is not as upsetting to that person because of the anonyminity. It's cowardly and spineless.

Keep posts relevant and don't sweat the small stuff. While I believe in being sensitive I have little patience for hypersensitivity which to me is nothing but an attempt for attention and control.
Old Nov 13th, 2001, 09:59 AM
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meant to "roll off my back"
Old Nov 13th, 2001, 10:10 AM
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That was an exception, Mimi ( if you're referring to that " Portugal and ...). Since I had written in Portuguese, and there are newcomers here that could have read the last part of the thread only ( it was quite a long thread that one, more than 100 posts), and ignore Claireobscur's words, advising the readers to use Babelfish to translate the Portuguese sentences into English, I though that a sort of explanation was necessary.


Old Nov 13th, 2001, 10:35 AM
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Hi, Not Me. Call me naive. I've lost wallets, and always get them back WITH THE CASH. I just had my cel phone returned by someone in the Virgin Islands who had found it in a cab in the States. And once, I even accidentally left my keys in the car door over night in Manhattan. Car was there in the morning. Surlok, thanks for replying, Patrick and Joanne, you're my kind of people (not scatterbrained--nice!)
Old Nov 13th, 2001, 01:59 PM
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I stopped posting with my real email several years ago after receiving totally weird and harassing emails. But, I assure you I've never sent anyone anything that could be called "creepy" so I totally disagree with Patrick. It's his decision what to do, but he shouldn't criticize others for deciding differently.
Old Nov 13th, 2001, 02:28 PM
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Patrick, till 2 months ago I never posted anonymously, and till then I totally agree with you. Like i said elsewhere, Jen wasn't talking about email responses anyway, but what was said here and got edited out.

And Mark, as a bit of an oldie, to a relative newbie, as I've been reading your posts you are right on the money. Keep up the good work and help drag this place back to where it used to be
Old Nov 13th, 2001, 02:41 PM
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Mark, I really like you analogy to swimming near someone who's drowning. That's right on the money.

I understand it is hard to develop a thick skin but no one should let themselves be personally wounded by what some complete stranger says about them on this (or any other) internet forum. When I used to work in retail we would occasionally have a customer come in the store and lambast one of the employees for no reason. We just said to each other, "that person had a problem before they came in here, they just vented it on us" and that is usually the case here.

And, I always post using the same name, don't need to hide behind anonymity, but also don't want to give out my private email. I get enough junk as it is.
Old Nov 13th, 2001, 05:23 PM
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I always use the same name and nonreal email address. I used to use a real email address and I got an enormous amount of spam; when I stopped, it stopped.
Old Nov 13th, 2001, 06:13 PM
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Kam, please reread my post. I was not aware that I was criticizing anyone for not using their real email address. The thread was about "creeps", and I suggested that "creeps" were more likely to hide behind fake email addresses than helpful posters were. I don't call that criticizing anyone except people who make "creepy" remarks, and I do not apologize if I offended them. I certainly did not mean to imply that anyone who uses a fake email address is a "creep" or only makes rude or nasty posts. I did not mean to suggest that if a person is uncomfortable using his real address, that he should do so and was certainly not criticizing anyone for using a fake email, just explaining that I use a real one and have had no problems, but that I seldom see a "nasty" or "creepy" poster using a real email address. Sorry if I offended you; it was certainly not intended.
Old Nov 13th, 2001, 06:45 PM
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Thanks xxxx

I've been coming to this forum for 2 years and - as we are all aware - the tone has defintely changed lately. And that concerns me. I enjoy reading people's questions and answers - novice to expert, and even sometimes the fashion threads - kinda like eating potato chips. If someone wants to call me stupid then explain why - who knows, you might be right. I don't think anyone here has a problem with discourse. A majority of the posters here strike me as kind, friendly, generous, reasonable individuals. And I think we are the majority. Who's forum? OUR forum.

Old Nov 14th, 2001, 01:18 AM
david west
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These are my real name and email address. I have never had any inapropriate emails ( I realise that this may be asking for trouble but I have a thick skin).

I have had some enquiries from people asking for more detail on something I've contributed, which is always welcome. Other than that no problems.


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