Winnipeggers have this macho thing about their weather; they like to claim that they survive in the coldest capital city in the world, and that Muscovites by comparison are a bunch of effete softies.<BR>Fine, but that is no reason for exposing an elderly English couple to its rigours without suitable insulation, and it is certainly no excuse for the Royal water taxi breaking down in midstream and having to be towed ashore. On the fifth day of her Golden Jubilee tour of Canada, the Queen landed in Winnipeg, capital of Manitoba, a place as far from the moderating influence of the sea as it is possible to get in North America, sheltered from the Arctic winds by a vast land mass as flat as the Cambridgeshire fens.<BR><BR>She went walkabout in a city park in front of a crowd of thousands variously wrapped in anoraks, parkas, bobble hats and blankets, greeting members of the Manitoba Welsh Corgi Association who had brought their dogs along, and viewing cultural displays. <BR>The Queen and the Duke of Edinburgh were then obliged to take seats on an exposed platform above the Red River and endure 20 minutes of welcoming speeches from local politicians and further local culture. If an 81-year-old man and his 76-year-old wife sat on the Eastbourne seafront at the onset of winter, they would at least have travelling rugs over their knees, and possibly a hip flask of brandy.<BR><BR>The air temperature was 4C (39.2F) but the wind was cutting. "We didn't expect it to be so cold; summer has suddenly turned to winter without any fall in between," a city official explained lamely. The Queen, as ever, kept her cool, but the Duke looked decidedly displeased, despite his heavy woollen overcoat, at the complete lack of any cold-weather alternative programme.<BR><BR>On a pontoon below them moored in the middle of the river, a choir of youngsters sang the Canadian National Anthem wearing only flimsy school uniform. But they had driven 36 hours from Churchill on the shores of Hudson Bay far to the north, the polar bear capital of the world; Winnipeg is their Torremolinos.<BR>

PART 2:<BR><BR>Author: Brrrr ([email protected])<BR> Date: 10/09/2002, 02:02 pm<BR><BR> Message: To continue their progress, the Royal couple then had to board a water taxi<BR> to reach their next engagement on the other side of the river. It was a voyage that<BR> should have lasted less than five minutes across a stream barely 20 yards wide, but<BR> the boat spluttered and died within moments of leaving the jetty. An escorting taxi had<BR> to draw alongside, be lashed to the Royal transport and tow it to the far bank. The<BR> Duke, despite being an admiral of the fleet in the Royal Navy, was powerless to<BR> assist and could only glower.<BR><BR> Gordon Cartwright, the hapless owner of the Splash Dash Water Bus Service,<BR> admitted afterwards his embarrassment at having the Queen on board and his boat<BR> break down. He insisted that it had been refuelled only an hour before, and that an<BR> inexplicable stall was just one of those things that happened in cold climates. But at<BR> least the Queen's discomfiture had been eased by a canoe full of locals who<BR> paddled alongside and sang her a French folk song.<BR><BR> The conjoined vessels then berthed on the far bank the wrong way round, with the<BR> Queen's boat on the outside. She had to step across the escort vessel to be reunited<BR> with the certainties of dry land. "That was interesting," she remarked to her host, Gary<BR> Doer, the Premier of Manitoba, which is Queenspeak for "I am not in the least<BR> amused". She would doubtless have been briefed in advance that the city's name<BR> derives from the aboriginal word for "muddy waters".<BR><BR> The Queen was taking no more chances. When she reappeared later in the evening<BR> to watch yet another outdoor cultural event in front of Manitoba's Parliament building,<BR> she was brazenly sporting a hefty mink coat, not caring two hoots what Canada's<BR> vocal anti-fur lobby might think. <BR><BR> As they sat in the gathering dusk the Duke plunged his right hand, Napoleon-like,<BR> into the breast of his overcoat, and tapped his foot energetically even when the music<BR> had stopped.<BR>

PART 3:<BR><BR>Author: Brrrr ([email protected])<BR> Date: 10/09/2002, 02:04 pm<BR><BR> Message: They watched a brief performance by the Royal Winnipeg Ballet,<BR> choreographed for the occasion, to the music of Faur&eacute;. Johnny Wright, the principal<BR> dancer, was known to be wearing long johns under his tights, and his partner Tara<BR> Birtwistle had discarded her tutu in favour of a long velvet dress with sleeves.<BR><BR> Behind them on the open-air stage, the Winnipeg Symphony Orchestra sawed away<BR> manfully at the Faur&eacute; and Handel's Firework Music. The female principal violin wore<BR> a stout grey padded anorak while the conductor had a portable stove blazing away by<BR> his rostrum. Local observers strongly denied suggestions that even in the depths of<BR> winter, when it can reach 40 below, orchestra and ballet ever performed in duffel<BR> coats and galoshes.<BR><BR> The cold notwithstanding, the Queen's presence drew a crowd to the city square of<BR> many thousands , who cheered and applauded her arrival with gusto. At least it was<BR> one way to keep warm.<BR><BR> Doing her professional best to retain her gracious smile, the Queen then moved<BR> inside the Parliament building to an official dinner laid on by the Manitoban<BR> Government. But things were again less than perfect; by some quirk of table<BR> planning, the Queen was seated at the top table with her back to most of the guests,<BR> and found herself looking out of the door down a grand staircase at two large bronze<BR> bison.<BR><BR> "The local guys insisted on organising this themselves, and wouldn't take our<BR> advice," a senior official of Canadian Heritage, the federal department which handles<BR> the head of state, said with a hint of chill that matched the climate.<BR><BR> The highlight of the Queen's evening was to switch on the floodlights illuminating the<BR> newly restored and regilded Golden Boy, a giant statue of a naked youth holding a<BR> torch and a sheaf of corn which has crowned the magnificently domed legislative<BR> building for the past 83 years.<BR><BR> While the statue was on the ground being refurbished this year, a number of prudish<BR> Winnipeggers, clearly in possession of powerful binoculars and a curious sense of<BR> priorities, took offence at the Golden Boy's manly accoutrements and demanded that<BR> the restoration should include their covering-up or even removal, despite the fact that<BR> they normally reside 200ft (61m) above street level. They lost, and the Boy remains<BR> intact. On the 5m-high statue, the offending parts are in fact disproportionately small.<BR> It's the cold, you see.<BR>

Clever! <BR><BR>But far better to "reply to your own initital post with 2nd and 3rd (and 4th?) parts, so all remain on a single thread.

Thanks for the great posts. I have been following this in our local papers but your version has a certain je ne sais quoi about it.<BR>Regards,<BR>A not yet frozen Cdn

What this tells me is that after all of their experience traveling, Her Majesty and Prince Philip still don't know how to pack for all weathers. <BR><BR>Layer, Your Majesty, layer!

<BR>Didn't read the whole post, but what do you expect from inbred hillbillies? Honestly, look at Prince Charles and tell me he's not a few chromosomes short. Who can blame Princess Di for leaving him.

Doesn't royalty check the weather when packing/preparing for a trip like the rest of us do? Duh.

Brrrrr<BR>This was just Great! Thanks so much for the laughs.<BR>And this should show those on here that get annoyed when people ask what to wear on a trip??? If the Queen had only posted here, imagine all the shivers she could have been spared!<BR>

Off the topic a little -- why does the Queen ALWAYS have a big ugly purse with her? I recently saw her on TV from Balmoral (I think) and there she was inside her own castle with one of those purses. What would she have in it? Money? keys? makeup? None of those seem too likely... <BR><BR>I also saw she had a purse when she threw out the puck at the Winnepeg hockey match.

I am from england, and I wish the queen would change her hairstyle and wardrobe. I dont understand why she wears those a-line frocks and has a shampoo and set. She has a lovely face when she smiles and could do with a make-over from the BBC2 show 'What not to wear'!

Brit Chick, didn't she go ash-blonde or does my tv tint need adjusting?

While not supporting the Queen, I think this post is more a comment on the organisational ability of the Manitoban Government and less about the genetic make up or royal wardrobe.

Jim<BR>why don't you support the Queen? Aren't you a loyal subject? I say, I am shocked, shocked! God Save The Queen!

Jim, unfortunately most of us here are not to the manor born. When we are cold on holiday, when we fail to anticipate the possibility of transportation snafus, we can of course blame our travel agents, or our hotel concierge, or the airlines, or our parents, or the government, or society, or whomever, but that won't make us any warmer, or introduce the necessary slack into our itineraries, or solve any problem whatsoever. <BR><BR>Laugh and learn, or whine and remain ignorant. <BR><BR>

The Queen carries her cell phone, her Palm Pilot, poop bags for the dogs, make up, brush, pills, tissues, keys, shopping lists, dry cleaners stubs, the usual that can be found in any ladies handbag