Hello friends,

I've seen posts here recently about proposing or getting married in Italy. My husband and I are celebrating our 10 year anniversary in northern Italy this May and now I'm toying with the idea of renewing our wedding vows while we're there. On our actual anniversary date I'd planned to take a day trip to Trento (we're basing in Verona), but our itinerary could easily be rearranged. My question is, where would I even start? I'm not talking about a big production, just an English-speaking minister to take a few minutes for a simple, intimate ceremony somewhere special, be it in a beautiful church or outdoor setting. Would I be able to make arrangements once I'm there, or should I make some phone calls ahead of time? We arrive in Verona on the 7th and the big day is the 14th. I'd like it to be a surprise, although I could just surprise him with the idea when we get there and plan it together. Help!

We renewed ours on a gondola in Venice for our ten year anniversary this past summer. I have to say that it was so perfectly planned with the help of our consultant, and is now one of the most memorable events of our life together. Although we kept things simple, as well, it was such a memorable day.

Although not done in Verona, feel free to check out the details in my trip report. Just do a text search for "Statia's Florence & Venice, Italy Trip Report." You can scan the report to the date that we did the renewal (July 9) for more info.

Whatever you decide, congrats on your anniversary!

Statia, wow. It sounds like that was truly a special day! I love your trip report, too. I noticed that you said it was almost a relief to have the ceremony over with so you could do as you pleased, without having to worry about any upcoming events. That has me wondering if we really should do this--this trip is a much needed escape (aren't they all?) and I don't want any extra stresses. Although, what I had in mind is even simpler than what you all did--no photographer, no consultant, no formal attire (my DH HATES getting dressed up and I know he wouldn't want to do it on vacation). We will be in Venice for the final two days of our trip, and the gondola thing crossed my mind, but it would be kind of nice to do it on the anniversary date. What I was imagining is during our sightseeing, just walking into a small but special church, having the pastor meet us (having this all pre-arranged without my husband knowing) and performing a short ceremony on the spot. Nothing legal or fancy. This mushy-gushy stuff is DH's "love language" and surprising him like that would mean a lot. I briefly checked out www.gettingmarriedinitaly.com and their services seem much more involved than what I'd want. How would I go about finding a pastor (we're not Catholic, but I guess a priest would do) I could hire for something like that?

I suspect if you wanted a religious officiant you would have to meet standards set by their denomination. I'm not sure that a Catholic priest would officiate at just anyone's whim. (Even in the US you have to meet standards set by the particular denomination.)

Since you want it to be simple, why not just the two of you? Create your own ceremony. You could chose a place and surprise your husband, turning to him with your professions of love and continued fidelity. You might offer him a ring or other appropriate remembrance. You might provide matching rings (bracelets, watches, chains, whatever) so you both can each exchange remembrances.

Whether you do this with or without an officiant, I hope you are secure in how your husband will react to such a surprise. Will he respond with similar loving expressions or will he just be embarassed? It sound like he will like the surprise. Congratulations.

ellenem,
Yes, I may have to do it that way...I emailed my hotel in Verona as well as my pastor here to see if they could provide any recommendations. Thanks for the help, guys!

Jocelyn, ellenem is correct, as I found in my research. You can't really have a ceremony in a church (even only a symbolic one) without going thru a lot of legal red tape.

With that in mind, we originally thought of doing something even more simple than we did, as you are saying. Just doing it on our own. However, once we found such a great consultant who handled everything for us on that end, we opted to do more for the event, yet still kept it simple in taste.

I also had the same problem with all the other constulants and agencies I dealt with in having package deals and not offering something as simple as we wanted. If you decide to do something in Venice, I'd be happy to put you in touch with our consultant because she really does exactly what YOU want without trying to sell you all sorts of other options. That's why she worked out so wonderfully for us. She is also certified to do symbolic renewals without all the legalities having to be involved. So, she was not only our consultant, but also our officiant, and she did a wonderful job.

With regards to breathing a sigh of relief once everything was over, I wasn't ever really stressed over the event itself. I think it was more worrying about the weather holiding out and carting our formal wear all over Italy. It sounds like that's something you wouldn't have to worry with.

Good luck in your decision.

NNNNOOOOOO! I emailed my pastor and our hotel in Verona since 95% of the time I'm the first one to see check our inbox, but my husband saw a message! So much for the surprise. He felt terrible that he saw it, although he really liked the idea.

So anyway, the hotel is doing some research for us. Statia, if they come up empty, I'd love to get the contact info for your consultant. Thanks for the offer!

I hope you get good news, Jocelyn. If not, however, you can contact me at [email protected].

Jocelyn,
The big event has come and gone. Please give us a report when you're back and recovered. We will be traveling to Italy in Sept with my brother and his wife. He wants to surprise his wife and plan a renewal ceremony. (On my suggestion, he got a second email address so she wouldn't see the emails!) I'd be very interested to hear who did the ceremony and how it all went!

turnercindy,

We just got back from our trip last night. We had a fabulous time, but I didn't arrange a special ceremony as it was turning into this complicated monster, and the purpose of the anniversary celebration was to relax and just spend quality time together. I will post a trip report as soon as I can. I will say that Verona was the perfect spot for such an occasion; we found Venice overcommercialized. It's so sad how that wonderful place has been so exploited.

Can't wait to hear how it all went Jocelyn.

Glad that you had a great time, Jocelyn! Happy Anniversary! Looking forward to your report.