travel together (2 divorced women) and we want to start going to Europe next year. The trouble is she does not wear the correct shoes, always the strappy sandals and pretty but uncomfortable pumps. And she doesn't dress for the weather, with low cut tops and tight pants.<BR>I have tried over and over to make hints and suggestions, but nothing gets across. <BR>The problem arises when she gets tired and cold and can't go on with the touring. Any suggestions from experienced travelers (we get along very well in every other aspect).

well, you could scout out nice cafes to plunk her in when she poops out, or even hang out with her there too.<BR><BR>maybe insist that she bring one practical outfit just in case, pain has a way to make you smarter!! she might end up living in the practicals.<BR><BR>also, try this: Steve Madden shoes. fashionable, and WOW are they comfy. that would at least solve that part - I can walk for hours (AND HAVE - 9 miles) in mine... and lived to tell about it.<BR><BR>beth

Do you know her shoe size? Get a comfortable pair of lightweight loafers, and when she gets tired force her to change. If she gets cold buy her a hot (non-alcohol!!!!) drink.

Good ideas! I wonder if there is a web site for Steve Madden shoes. We could both get some if they are so highly recommended. And the hot drinks sound good for both of us too.<BR><BR>We will probably start with Italy and branch out from there. <BR>

Wait a minute here!!<BR>You are saying your best friend the divorcee walks around all the time when you travel wearing innapropriately tight pants, and strappy little hooker shoes and you want us to recommend how to tell her to dress for a trip to Europe?????? Let her go dressed like that to Italy-they will love her there.<BR>

To IsThisa, I don't think I get your drift. I didn't say trampy, alot of women dress this way in the big city where we are from. And why the divorcee reference, are we expected to be tramps?

IsThisa is probably just jealous, stuck at home in a house dress married to a jerk.

No -- my wife is the one in the housedress<BR>1-first off she says she is divorced -she said it first!<BR>2-her friend "wears low cut tops and tight pants", that isn't inapproriate for tourists? <BR>3-she admits she herself tries and tries to "make suggestions but they don't get across" <BR>So-Tina-my "drift" is- you described your friend as dressing trampy and you not being able to change her but you take offense at the description you gave? You sound like a troll to me..that shouldn't be such a hard drift to get.

well, a little controversy for a quiet night!<BR>If this is in fact not a troll, and you are really good friends, you should be able to tell her that she needs to get some good walking shoes and dress right for the occassion.Otherwise, you might have to look elsewhere for a traveling companion!

Sorry, I didn't know you are a man. I just took a little offence at the tramp reference. Low cut isn't bad in the summer, but she wears them in the winter too along with the sandals. Kind of like dressing for Palm Beach, not trampy so much just weather inappropiate. Didn't mean to jump on you.

Tell her she looks foolish and acts foolish, and to grow up, and to wear sensible shoes.

When she gets tired - instead of plunking her down in a cafe, prop her up against a lamp post, I'm sure someone in car will be stopping to offer her a lift in a matter of minutes....

Tina,<BR>How about an organized tour? You could continue with the group while she sits on the bus with sore feet. Might be a comprise and an eye-opener for her.<BR>Good luck.

Hi Tina:<BR> Easy Spirit Shoes and Aerosole shoes are sold virtually everwhere and are very comfortable walking shoes. If she will not change to more comfortable shoes and continue enjoying the attractions, then get another travelling companion that has some sense.

Since finding a new travel companion may not be such as easy task, just make the best of it. If you can convince her to take other shoes, great! If not, do the stuff you really want to do first thing and if she poops out, leave her at the hotel and continue on your own.

I think that it's her problem if she gets uncomfortable. Just tell her that if she won't dress appropriately then you'll just go on your own.<BR><BR>Don't let her stubborness ruin your holiday, after all your trip is going to cost a lot of money!

Trina: Please read the thread about difficult travel companions, before committing to anything. (If someone could top it, that would be helpful.) It is a long, funny but yet disheartening thread. You will understand the need to be up front BEFORE you go.

Hi, Tina. I think it is best to get this resolved before you go. You can't change people, but your friend needs to understand, at least, that her bad habits cannot ruin your good time. Tell her that she can still maintain some sense of fashion (and even be sexy which seems to be important to her) and still be comfortable. She also needs to understand that part of traveling to other countries means not having everything the way that she's used to. Meals will not be prepared the same way even if she orders something familiar to her, etc. Will she be open to these differences?<BR><BR>You didn't mention where and when you'd be going. We might be able to provide some fashion tips if we had more details of the itinerary or at least interests. Maybe she could make the fashion aspect a fun part of the planning. <BR><BR>When all is said and done, though, you have to ask yourself whether you will actually be able to dump your friend if she is ruining your good time. This may be easier said than done. Best wishes.

ttt

Tina, I think it's terrific to travel with friends and this isn't an insurmountable problem. Buying her comfy, fashionable shoes and a great looking cotton caridgan is a first step. But, how will she feel about lugging her bags on and off of the train/vaporetto and to the hotel? Will she spend hours complaining of sore feet and chills? Also, many beautiful cathedrals and churchs won't allow visitors inside without what is deemed "appropriate" dress. You might tactfully bring these issues up while talking about your plans. If worse comes to worse, you can sightsee in the afternoon and she can shop for Italian shoes and clothes. Best friends are difficult to come by, so you want to make sure that you work these issues out before you go.<BR><BR>I hope that you have a wonderful vacation whatever you choose to do.