My fiance and I are getting married on July 10th and then leaving for a 2 week honeymoon in France. We are staying at 2 bed and breakfasts, one about an hour and half south of Paris and the other near Nice. We plan on renting a car for part and taking the train for another part.

We have done a pretty fair amount of research, but neither of us has traveled outside the country before. We both speak some French and are willing to make an effort. Any advice for us would be much appreciated!

That's the absolute best advise..try and speak their language. You may not be good at it but they REALLY do appreciate it very much. Second item, don't contrast and compare in public-the locals find it insulting and they do not really care how we do things on the other side of the pond.

Gee, what kind of advice would you like -- itinerary, customs, what to avoid.........

If I had to give 4 or 5 pointers about France, they would be:

1. It is better to be overdressed than underdressed in France.
Maybe this baby-boomer is getting fusty but I just cannot travel to France without a just-in-case jacket and tie, even for a summer trip in the country

2. Do not start out by calling anyone over 16 TU, always VOUS. Let them be the first to use it. And always Monsieur, Madame unless the person is so young or the circumstances so intimate that it would be absurd.

3. Check on closing days and store hours as soon as you hit town, if you know you will need to shop or dine out (lots of mid-week and Sunday closings, even in summer -- I was astonished when we asked about staying on an extra night at our Burgundy hotel: Monsieur, l hotel ferme le dimanche soir!)

4. The French are, overall, great drivers (outside of Paris, perhaps) who all seem to have taken the same driving course. Follow their lead RE yielding to traffic entering from the right, roundabout etiquette, etc.

5. Finally: ATMs are everywhere but in retail tansactions, bank cards seem to prevail over credit cards. Self-service gas bars may have no cashier on Sundays and in the evening: it has several times happened to us on long trips that we could not find a gas bar that took credit cards -- we had to entreat understandably sceptical Frenchmen to accept our cash and put our purchase on their bank card. Humiliating!

Remember always to greet the person behind the counter in a shop; it's considered bad manners not to do so. And always use a title, as in "Bonjour madame" or "Bonjour monsieur."

Don't touch the produce in an open-air market.

When asking for directions, begin with "Excusez-moi, Madame or Monsieur."

If you have time, pick up one of Polly Platt's excellent books on how to get along in France. She gives very useful advice that will take you a long way.

Have a wonderful honeymoon and enjoy your stay in France.

We found the French people to be extremely nice, none of the rudeness I had read about. Our efforts to say even a few words in French were greeted with every effort to communicate. Even people on the street who we approached for directions etc. were nice enough to take a moment to help out, take a picture for us, etc. Have a great time.

Hi am,

Also make sure to say "thank you" - merci.

>Don't touch the produce in an open-air market.<

Don't touch the products anywhere. Point to what you would like to see and ask "please?" - s'il vous plait?. They will show it to you.

Dont ask, "How much is that in real money?".

In his witty and perceptive book, "Les Français aussi ont un accent"(The French also have an accent), the Canadian journalist Jean-Benoît Nadeau provides what he calls his basic survival kit of politeness for NOrth Americans in France:

1. Only smile when it is appropriate (I'm translating loosely). Someone who smiles on first meeting is taken for a fool, a hypocrite, a door-to-door salesman or worse.

2 Excuse yourself befor asking for information, and explain the nature of your problem. The French love to play the role of fireman.

3. In a shop, always say "bonjour" when entering and "au revoir" when leaving. While in North America, a store is an extension of a public place, in France, the shop is seen as an extension of the shopkeeper's home. This rule even applies in department stores.

4. Keep your voice low in public. The French have a pronounced sense of privacy and detest being invaded.

If you don't read French, I recommend an excellent book by Nadeau and his wife, Julie Barlow, "Sixty Million Frenchmen Can't be Wrong (Why we love France but not the French)." It overlaps a bit with Nadeau's book, and for a North American helps break the code on why the French are the way they are.

We just returned from 2 weeks in France--a gite in Brittany and the rest of the time in the Loire valley. I have to contradict tedgale's advice about being overdressed. Granted, we weren't going out for $100 meals, but i never saw anyone in a coat and tie. We also stayed it b & b's in the Loire valley and people dressed just as casually as we do at home. I should also add, that we took a bike trip and when I was asking the guy who planned it about clothing he made a point of emphasizing to me that the French are quite casual in their dress. What we saw reinforced his point.

Drink the wine, not the water.

If they don't seem to understand what you are saying, speak very, very loudly -- this will help.

Have a great trip!

laverendre,
Same everywhere, but as we "gringos" have no manners, we are not accustomed to speaking politely.
M

La Verendrye, porteur d'un grand nom canadien: What a delicious recitation of observations and insights. Let me add one more of my own:

No Frenchman ever says "I don't know/ Sais pas" -- unless he says it with narrowed eyes and sidelong gaze, as if to say "And what normal person would admit to knowing the answer to your daft and impertinent question?"

Never wear a tie - only the older generation (50+) do this. A jacket and Italian collar (collar worn open with no tie) is considered de rigeur. Don't waste your time with ties. Wear quality belts with your trousers, even if they aren't visible it's always best to wear one, the French are usually particular about this.

Of course the down and outs and peasants in France are like that in any other country! You sound like you're having a pleasingly casual and laidback holiday, pack casual clothes with a smart jacket/suit for the evening if you intend to dine at smart places. Enjoy!

You should not hand money directly to a French cashier - there is usually a small tray on the counter. You can lay your money down there, and pick up the change from there.

<<Wear quality belts with your trousers, even if they aren't visible it's always best to wear one, the French are usually particular about this>>

AH, yes! This is a seriously useful bit of information. I'm surprised Polly Platt hasn't devoted an entire chapter to it. Those Gendarmes de Ceintures are almost Talibanesque, roaming the city and preying on unsuspecting firt-time visitors, sticking their prying, Gallic fingers up under your sweaters to make sure your belt is of qualité supérieure. It can be très, très shocking! And if your trousers aren't visible - oo la la! Expect to be hauled right off to the nearest jail!

Buy a baguette, a round of Epoisse cheese and enjoy! Perhaps an oneophile reading this can recommend a great wine to go with it.

Really? No ties? My husband will be delighted. I'm making him take a navy cashmere sports jacket. So does this mean he could wear something like a polo collar shirt under it?

You say you are there for the summer, you ever wear wool based garments in this season, a "navy cashmere sports jacket" is wholly inappropriate. Wear cottons, linens with or without silk blend - summer is about lightweight garments, not an heavy "navy cashmere sports jacket". As for a polo shirt - that is not a collar, when I talk about collars, I mean something that is starched and has stays in the tips (collar bones). Get your financé some smart-casual shirts, maybe slightly fitted with rounded hems so they can be worn out of the trousers. I'd recommend Miu Miu, Marni, and Dries van Noten their mens collections this year were young, summery and quite funky too.

Ditch the polo shirt and "navy cashmere sports jacket" try something more in keeping with the time of year and place.

"Don't contrast and compare in public - the locals find it insulting and they really don't care how we do things across the pond."

Actually, some of 'them' do care providing they are the ones making the contrasts and comparisons, or in other words if they are the ones calling the shots. Thus, don't allow yourself to be bullied into conversing on any subject without mutual agreement, on the phony and specious grounds that it is French custom for one party to submit to the demands or ultimatums of another. If patriotism is the last refuge of a scoundrel, cultural custom must surely be the penultimate such refuge. Of course, if you wish to discuss something, that is another matter. Otherwise, I suggest you give one of your best imbecilic North American smiles and reply "I bow to your superior wisdom on the subject."

I was in France for the first time in April, and although I spoke only the minimal amount of French, I found the shopkeepers MORE than eager to help me in order to entice me into purchasing their things! It was a wonderful experience, and not once in one week did I feel intimidated or felt that I was treated rudely. In fact, one waiter matter-of-factly told us that they are very much missing the American tourist dollar! Enjoy!

Resist the urge to compare the cost of everything from Euros into $'s as it will disrupt your trip and may cause sleepless nights.