maitaitom

Here's my latest trip report (with photos). Chapters Two through Nine cover Milan and Bologna (with days trips ... by train ... to Ravenna and Padua from Bologna. Have fun!

https://travelswithmaitaitom.com/italy-2018/

kja

I've dined solo in many places around the world, from "holes in the wall" to places in the list of top-50 in-the-world -- and yes, I've dined alone in Capri.

I remember the first few times that I dined alone. I remember fearing it and feeling uncomfortable doing it until my first business trip required it. Oh, of course I'm dining alone! And if I can do that, why not dine alone when traveling for pleasure? Bingo!

Honestly, I enjoy dining alone while traveling! I can devote every bit of my attention to savoring tastes -- if that is what I choose to do. Or I can reflect on my day without distraction. I soon realized that no one really cares that I'm dining alone -- and really that isn't such a surprising discovery: (hitting myself upside my head) people are engaged in their own lives. I shouldn't say that NO one cares -- sometimes people at a neighboring table engage me in conversation or invite me to joint them, so you might want to think about how you might respond (but do leave it to the spur of the moment).

I always bring my Kindle and often read during my meal. FWIW, you might want to think about the difference between a Kindle (mine is NOT back lit!) and other read-able devices that act as sources of light. I don't like having a light on my face while in a restaurant, nor do I like being distracted by such lights when other people look at their devices. But that's just me -- maybe you will feel differently. I just mention it because I wouldn't have thought about it if I hadn't already experienced it.

Please note that solo travel can be addictive! I am a true convert.
You might find some inspiration from the many trip reports linked into this thread:
Goin' solo...nothing like it! (A trip report collection)

Hope that helps! And do keep posting your questions.

Travel_Nerd

I get the dining alone thing, truly. I'm a single woman in my early 40s. Been single for 10 years - and still don't "like" eating out alone.

Might I suggest you try it maybe once or twice a month in your hometown before you travel so you get "used" to it? It will help.

Do I still find it awkward? Sometimes. However, as I type this I am at a NBA basketball game halftime.... alone.

KJa's suggestion to have a book/Kindle/device is a good one. Or, use the opportunity to practice eating mindfully and taking in all 5 senses during each meal. Or, find a Market and collect picnic items and find a gorgeous Italian spot to have it in front of. Ignore the couples - they will just fight mid-honeymoon (kidding)!

kja

With all due respect for Travel_Nerd, I must admit that dining alone in my home town was not a good "practice" opportunity for ME, because I always wondered whether someone I knew might see me -- which would not have been the case elsewhere. ; Maybe that will work for you -- only you know what it is that makes you anxious! Just another bit of input to weigh as you move forward,

suze

I've always been single and I travel solo often. If I wasn't able to "eat out alone" ... I'd never get to go to restaurants!

You don't have to practice at home. If you're terribly nervous take something with you... a magazine, a paperback book, your travel journal, some postcards to write out, while you're waiting for your food.

Some people think it's easier to eat at the bar when you're alone. I don't. And I don't want to have to chat with strangers (where I speak the language).

I do try to eat a bit off hours (early or late) and in places that aren't jam packed at the time (so as not to take up a table for one, when it could be a party of 2 or 4 for the waiter). Also I tip a bit extra when I'm solo, same idea.

Last tip for female solo diners (of any age)... if you drink order wine immediately. That will show that you aren't a - glass of tap water & side salad only - kind of diner

whitehall

I am not single traveler, but, having owned a hotel and a restaurant, I am very familiar with the couples bias in the hospitality industry (easer to put a single into a double than vice versa, and a restaurant makes less from a table of one than a table of two). Having said that, my daughter is a single traveler, often blogs about it and embraces it. She certainly has never seen any stigma with it. If that is an issue for you, I think most people are fairly self-absorbed, especially on vacation, and doubt many people would give you a second thought. Especially today where more than half of the adult population is 50%. As Suze says, there are plenty of restaurants eager to give you any table for early dining. Since we owned a fine dining restaurant, we are aware that a lot of prep work is done in the couple hours before dinner service, so we always eat early anyway to get the freshest food. And, we have found that even some airbnbs charge significantly less for one than two. And, with a bit of searching, there are lodging places, especially b and b's that often cater to singles.

bon_voyage

planestrainsauto

Wow. I can't express my gratitude for all the lovely words of encouragement and links and recommendations. This site restricts the amounts of replies I can make in one day and I had a crazy work week so here are some thoughts and thanks:

@PalenQ thanks for the train info and other links. I think you have sold me on Bologna!

@suze probably 10 days. Beach not as important as relaxing. and don't worry, ordering a glass of wine as soon as I sit down is not a problem

@travel_nerd: for Bologna and Milano, food classes, art, music, walking tours, I will PM you for the specifics thanks!

@StCirq would love your Milano rec I am drawn to stay in hotels but if you think the apartment would be willing to rent for only 1-2 nights there that woudl be great.

@maitaitom thank you for those reports!

@whitehall thank you so much for those trip reports! What was it about Milano that you didn't like?

@dreamon great links and advice thank you!

On the subject of eating along - I am fairly comfortable. I lived in NYC for 15 years where dining alone is not taboo and as a single person who loves food and doesn't always have a date or friend free, am no stranger to eating at the bar. I think my fear was more the "romantic" aspects of some Italian locations may make it difficult to eat solo and not feel like the only one!

OVERALL TRIP UPDATE: Today is research day. Reading your links, your trip reports and starting to put together what I hope will be a trip that involves Milan, perhaps Bologna/Parma/Moderna or one of the three, and then a few days in Cinque Terre. I am aiming for 10-14 days.

Will report back, and likely have more questions as I continue to plan but for now I have to read all the great info you all shared

Grazie!
Liz

planestrainsauto

Hello friendly Fodors friends,

I've started to hone in on my itinerary.Coming from the west coast I am thinking of flying in via Amsterdam, spending a day and then on to Bologna. The rest is as follows:

• Bologna: 3.5 days, planning for day trips to Parma and Modena
• Cinque Terre: Train to Cinque Terre arriving Sunday evening, staying for two full days and nights and leaving on the third morning
• Milano: Train to Milan and spend afternoon, following full day and fly back to U.S the next AM.

I'm looking for feedback on the length of time in Bologna. My main focus is food and art. Hoping to find a cooking class or food tour in Parma or Modena and tack day trips to both. Cinque Terre I hope to hike the coast line and stay in one location at night. Having two full days there felt the the right amount.

Would be grateful for your feedback on:
- length of time in each location
- day trips to Parma and Modena (yes? both? missing anything?
Would love also recommendations for hotels, day tours, classes, places to eat!

thank you!

kja

A day isn't much for Amsterdam. You might consider deferring a visit to the delightful city until you can give it more time, adding the day to Milan.

planestrainsauto

I should have specified that Amsterdam is a "Way in" for expense and flight option reasons (coming from Seattle). I hope to go back some day, but figured I would have at least a day there to explore.

janisj

I think your plan looks fine. Just one concern -- Is this trip still in August? If so I'd really (REALLY) consider dropping the CT. Sure, you will be there overnight so the day trippers will leave . . . but it will be EXTREMELY crowded during the days.

As for the dining alone issue discussed up thread -- I travel probably 75% of the time solo, maybe even a bit more. So I am always dining alone. Everything from casual bistros to 3 star Michelin places. Don't give it a second thought - really. My biggest problem is when I don't have a table mate I tend to eat faster because there is no chit chat. And can end up dashing through what should/could be a more leisurely experience. So to slow me down a bit I do take a book (or more often an e-book). And often just order my wine and starter and tell the waiter I'll decide on my main course after the appetizer is served. That automatically builds in some pace. Same with dessert . . .

Often at higher end places they will try to seat you at the bar which sometimes is perfectly fine/fun even -- the the open kitchens where you can watch the organized chaos and miracles coming out, and talk with the bar staff when they have the time. But I am very short and sitting at some bars/on some bar stools is an ordeal so I do stand my ground and will insist on a table when that is what I want.

StCirq

Here is the Milano apartment: we rented it in winter for 6 nights for about 80 euros a night. But if you're only spending a night in Milano, it's not going to be worth ihttps://www.booking.com/hotel/it/coo...rtment.it.html

I don't understand one night in Amsterdam, either. You'll be too jetlagged to get anything out of it.

And 3.5 days is a good minimum for Bologna, but to leave town for two of them to go elsewhere - why?

You couldn't pay me enough to go to the Cinque Terre in August or September.

Long story short, this is not at all my sort of trip - it would drive me absolutely nuts and leave me feeling like I had cheated myself. But that's not the point. It's your trip

janisj

. . . and I understand the Amsterdam thing. I sometimes spend a night in London en route to my final destination. If the fare is good and you want to see just a bit of Amsterdam there is no harm in staying one night. But you definitely would not have a 'day' there unless you stay two nights. With the arrival logistics and jet lag and flying out the next morning you will have just a few (possibly groggy) hours in the afternoon/early evening.

planestrainsauto

Thank you @JanisJ and @StCirq for the prompt replies! Part of the reason for the short time in Amsterdam, is that I have limited time off and Italy is the main destination. Flights to Amsterdam are less pricey from Seattle but I didn't want to spend too much time there

I'm hearing lots of feedback against Cinque Terre in August. I am kind of locked into August as it's the best time for me to be away from work and I really wanted to see the coast and Italian Riviera (having done Amalfi before). But if it's going to be completely unbearable I would love other recommendations for either waterfront areas near Bologna/Milan area OR perhaps heading north toward Lake Como area would be nice?

StCirq

I would add at least a bit of time to Milan and take a train into the lakes region. Our favorite is Lago Maggiore, which is a simple train ride from Milan, and even in high season you're not likely to be strangled to death by tourists like in Cinque Terre.

janisj

The Lakes would be crowded but nothing nothing like the CT - plus being a larger region it can absorb the crowds a lot better.

bon_voyage

planestrainsauto

Well, my mother reminded me that Fodor's Forums NEVER steered her wrong when she planned our trips to Italy, France and England when I was a teenager - and those were all great trips .

Due to your great advice I am now focusing on Bologna as home base for 4-5 nights so that I have some time in Bologna itself to explore and relax and maybe do a cooking class as well as day trips to Parma and Modena. Then I am thinking on to Lake Como area for 2 nights in Varenna or Bellagio ending with a few nights in Milan before heading back to the U.S.

Cinque Terre will have to wait

janisj

Quick learner