Hi Everyone,

My husband and I just got back from Italy. Some of the time when we ate in small eateries, we always ordered one apetizer, one main course, one second course, and one salad. Then we just shared. Is this considered a rude behavior in Italy?

Thank you for your advise.

I think it can be considered so in some restaurants and especially in European countries. When they seat two people at a table, they kind of expect to be serving two meals.
A good question, clok

I think it is more rude to waste food that you know you can't eat. My husband and I have shared meals all over Europe and in Hawaii and have never had any problems. No one has ever acted like we were committing a sin. Most of the time the restaurants were very accommodating, even bringing us extra plates, etc. Of course, we also left good tips for this service.

Sharing food isn't so much rude as .... well, perhaps out of step, not especially stytlish. Nest time, why not instead simply order a starter and entree each, and chew slowly. Have some bread, bottled water, and wine, and take your coffee in a small sidewalk place after a brisk walk. Eschew all desserts! If it's a weight issue for the two of you, travelling can be deadly when it comes to food. Order wisely and enjoy your meals.

God forbid one should not be "stylish" in Europe!

oh betty can you see it, shared plate squeezed between them, maybe sharing silverware too, and a wine glass. What about if they grabbed it the same time, what a mess. Common napkin, that too. Now, isn't stylish better in europe or anywhere else. Leave that bowl sharing for football games and movies. I honestly cant remember food sharing except in high school. That wasn't stylish in the least of all.

My wife and I have shared appetizers and desserts (especially desserts) for years and have never considered this to be unstylish, nor has it ever presented an awkward situation. On this last trip, whenever I would order dessert and Tracy would not, the waiter or waitress, on almost every occasion, brought us two forks or two spoons (with a knowing smile). Then Tracy would proceed to eat most of my dessert, and I'd have to order another one, anyway.

I know some people even worry about offering a bite of their dinner with another at the table When I order steak and Tracy orders fish, and she raves about her fish, I want to taste it. No big deal.

I guess the stylish issue isn't really all the relevant, so I'm sure it was okay to share. Afterall, the waitresses seemed to condone it, and they should know.

The Yankee and I share but we still order for two. Then we do as Tom does and share each others food ..
I cannot just eat my own dessert, I have to taste his too~
Since the portions are usually smaller than US restaurants, I would imagine two people might not get that much to eat, sharing a meal for one.
If you just got back from Italy and did this, what were your impressions at the time?

I sometimes I travel with my sister and other times with my husband. My sister and I usually share. This last trip to Brugges my daughter, sister and I stopped at a restaurant at an off time and it was empty. We ordered two meals and I was going to share from each. The owner came over before the meal came and said, "You want to share?" We said yes and he kicked us out. Never ever has that happened before or since. And we weren't taking up space that he would have used for other guests. We laughed it off and went elsewhere.

During our travels on the continent, we obviate the need for sharing by ordering conservatively, small starters and a single course, either first or second plates when in Italy, but never both. We omit the bread in favor of prosecco or something fun beforehand (we always tell the wait staff we cannot think without a drink in our hand!), and of course a bottle of water, then serious perusal of the wine list. We rigorously decline dessert, in favor of a brief walk, then nice sidewalk table for coffee, and perhaps an "eau de view" finale. We tell each other about our dishes, but we do not share, believing relationships are lightloy enhanced by a bit of mystery. This is our stylde, but we do not suggest it for all. To each his own, we say.

Only if it's done mouth-to-mouth.

Bet you loved high school lunch periods!

We're just back from Venice and have never taken two full meals. Far too much! We usually ordered one starter and two main courses with one salad. For our shared starter we would always get one extra plate without asking, so I guess it's kind of normal.

My husband and I always share our meals because we like to have two different tastes.

If we ordered two appetizers, two dinners and two desserts, it would be way too much food. Usually we just order two dinners, and trade plates half way through.

If we're having one appetizer, one salad, one dinner and one dessrt, I order the appetizer and salad as my dinner, and my husband orders the dinner.

We've never worried about what other people think about it.

I am one of those people who hate to waste food I know I'm not going to eat, too. Many times, my husband and I share a meal, and it's enough for both of us. Then, if we're still hungry, well, we order something else. Personally, I don't see anything wrong with that.

However, like Ann1, I have also had the experience where a waiter has told me that sharing is not allowed in that particular restaurant. One waiter even told me that although we wanted to just order one meal and share, we would be charged twice, because 2 people were eating. Needless to say, we did NOT eat there.

Oh, and forgot to mention: I was eating with a friend in a restaurant, and she was letting her young toddler nibble some of the food off her plate. We were paying separately. When she got her bill, she had been charged for a child's meal, even though she had not ordered anything other than her own entree. She asked for the manager....when it was all over, it had turned our nice lunch into quite an unpleasant experience.

On the other hand Brim, remember restaurants count seats as meals. You will be taking a reservation they could have. Regardless what some think, most restaurants who do serve FRESH food do not make much profit.

I know that any business has to make a profit....

But by that logic, if I meet my friend for a drink, and she orders a meal, but I don't eat anything... I just sit there watching her eat while we talk....will I still get charged for a meal? That, to me, is a good way to drive away customers who might come back and have a meal there in the future. Not to mention the bad PR that the restaurant will get.

If a restaurant is going to make it a policy to charge people who either don't eat any of the food at all, or who shares a single meal with another person, or a child who just nibbles off of Mommy's plate, then they need to post a notice in HUGE letters on the front door so a person can see that and walk away without ever darkening that restaurant's doorstep. It would save everyone a lot of unpleasantness.

I guess Brim, that there are restaurants and restaurants. I'm only telling you there are some where you only book where there will be two are eating, in Europe, and you both are expectd to order.. I've not said it correctly, I'm sure, someone jump in.