Have You Ever Travelled with an Almost Stranger?
Mar 12th, 2006, 09:07 AM
#81
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WOW! What a great and humorous thread!
I really liked reading it and I loved most of the comments (I am getting ready for a late April Paris trip and will be doing something similar to this).
Two things I didnt like about this thread... (but were still humorous for all the wrong reasons)
1. The bone head who thinks he needs to feel pitty. WTH? I am Tamaras' age. First off, not every one has an endless supply of cash. If she can save a few bits here and there while having FUN - more power to her. She's got a plan B. I was personaly insulted by the remark that makes ppl in their early 30s seem as if they have no business traveling this way. *rolls eyes*
2. I almost got fed up w/ the fact Tamara had to explain the same thing over and over to some members! Some ppl need to read!
Fun 2 U Tamara! I will be looking for your TR!
~Jay ([email protected])
I really liked reading it and I loved most of the comments (I am getting ready for a late April Paris trip and will be doing something similar to this).
Two things I didnt like about this thread... (but were still humorous for all the wrong reasons)
1. The bone head who thinks he needs to feel pitty. WTH? I am Tamaras' age. First off, not every one has an endless supply of cash. If she can save a few bits here and there while having FUN - more power to her. She's got a plan B. I was personaly insulted by the remark that makes ppl in their early 30s seem as if they have no business traveling this way. *rolls eyes*
2. I almost got fed up w/ the fact Tamara had to explain the same thing over and over to some members! Some ppl need to read!
Fun 2 U Tamara! I will be looking for your TR!
~Jay ([email protected])
Mar 12th, 2006, 09:35 AM
#82
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I would say to just take everything with a grain of salt. Many of us have traveled with friends we have known for years and it can be a difficult situation, though we know each other well. And like many may have said possibly previously, chatting with someone or talking with someone is not necessarily the same as spending a good amount of time with the person.
It is similar to how people can be the best of friends, but due to differences, would not make good roommates. The same theory applies to traveling.
Have a great trip and be careful.
I would also suggest maybe having a backup in case sleeping in the same room doesn't work out too well.
It is similar to how people can be the best of friends, but due to differences, would not make good roommates. The same theory applies to traveling.
Have a great trip and be careful.
I would also suggest maybe having a backup in case sleeping in the same room doesn't work out too well.
Mar 12th, 2006, 09:40 AM
#83
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Hey Jay, thanks for the POSITIVE thoughts. IF I were to go on a trip with a friend, relative, or aquaintance with so many negative thoughts, the trip would surely be doomed. However, this is not the case. I also want to hear about your trip!
And, again, since it comes up every post..THERE IS A PLAN B! Cancel all hotel reservations and say, "See you on the flight home"
And, again, since it comes up every post..THERE IS A PLAN B! Cancel all hotel reservations and say, "See you on the flight home"
Mar 12th, 2006, 09:46 AM
#84
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I don't understand your anger.
Did you want to hear a specific response?
Please do not feel that anyone is judging you. Nor, are we all pessimists.
We are just speaking from personal experience.
Have a great trip.
Did you want to hear a specific response?
Please do not feel that anyone is judging you. Nor, are we all pessimists.
We are just speaking from personal experience.
Have a great trip.
Mar 12th, 2006, 10:12 AM
#85
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Birthdaygirlstrip: I'm far from angry. How did you read anger when I have a smiley at the end of my post? One disadvantage of this sort of forum is we read our own concept of tone into other people's words. I'm not angry. This is the internet, I have a much thicker sking than that But thanks. Oh, and I was not looking for a specific response. I figure, just like all things in life, people have had wonderful experiences traveling with friends, family, etc, and have had horrific ones too. This is life.
But thanks. Oh, and I was not looking for a specific response. I figure, just like all things in life, people have had wonderful experiences traveling with friends, family, etc, and have had horrific ones too. This is life.
Mar 12th, 2006, 10:17 AM
#86
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I am sorry if I misread you. You just made comments that seemed as if you were upset that people were telling you to be careful of possible negative things that can happen and you implied that if negative things happened, it was the fault of those involved or other people's projections.
Have a great trip.
Have a great trip.
Mar 12th, 2006, 10:47 AM
#87
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Thanks birthdaygirl, I think you're going on one too if I remember correctly, have a great time! BTW, how silly of me to blame perfect strangers on the internet if there are bad moments on my trip (which there inevitably will be) LOL. That's sorta funny actually.
Mar 31st, 2006, 07:37 PM
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I steadfastly resisted the temptation to respond to anything in this post for over a month... When it came back up, I thought maybe TamaraEden was back from her trip. Darn... I was so looking forward to a report.
Apr 6th, 2006, 12:10 AM
#93
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Back as of midnight tonight. Exhausted, up for over 24 hours. I had been doing trip reports with photo links on my blog while over there. I'll go ahead and copy and paste that to a trip report thread in the next day.
As far as the initial question regarding traveling with an acquaintance...Let's just say...traveling with a person with whom you have no long standing ties or history is a good thing when one of you decides that they would prefer to travel alone.
Yes, it's true. We arrived. And from the get go, I could tell that we would not be good travel partners. I won't go into extraordinary details but I will say that when a person spends the arrival day at a pharmacist and doctor's office because meds were left at home, when they correct you when you speak, when they have no interest on an 8 hour flight in getting excited looking through travel books, when you find that person sleeping at 3pm, and sleeping in a little later than you prefer. When you like to go a little more rapidly through museums because of most of the day wasted and other things you were hoping to do. When both of you are already stressed out on a vacation and when you are bickering over who has the right directions instead of just enjoying the adventure...
When you have these things on the FIRST day...that's when you know it's time to pull out the chicken card Since I had made it clear (before the trip) that if we didn't travel well together we would go our own way; it wasn't so hard for me to say these very words on the second day. I knew for sure this was not going to work. And so, I sat down with my (ex) travel partner and simply explained this wasn't working for me. It didn't go over really well, and so basically we shared the room in Amsterdam for the remaining 2 nights, and from then on, no see, no speak. And to stay with the traveling alone theme, I changed my airline seat on the way home
Anyway...my final thoughts is that it's ok to try to travel with someone new. It's ok as long as you have in your mind an alternate plan that you can be happy with. I was happy with my plan overall. Travelling with a friend or partner is far more ideal, but in the end, if the trade off to travelling alone is not travelling at all...I say go for it! Take risks! And live!
As far as the initial question regarding traveling with an acquaintance...Let's just say...traveling with a person with whom you have no long standing ties or history is a good thing when one of you decides that they would prefer to travel alone.
Yes, it's true. We arrived. And from the get go, I could tell that we would not be good travel partners. I won't go into extraordinary details but I will say that when a person spends the arrival day at a pharmacist and doctor's office because meds were left at home, when they correct you when you speak, when they have no interest on an 8 hour flight in getting excited looking through travel books, when you find that person sleeping at 3pm, and sleeping in a little later than you prefer. When you like to go a little more rapidly through museums because of most of the day wasted and other things you were hoping to do. When both of you are already stressed out on a vacation and when you are bickering over who has the right directions instead of just enjoying the adventure...
When you have these things on the FIRST day...that's when you know it's time to pull out the chicken card
Since I had made it clear (before the trip) that if we didn't travel well together we would go our own way; it wasn't so hard for me to say these very words on the second day. I knew for sure this was not going to work. And so, I sat down with my (ex) travel partner and simply explained this wasn't working for me. It didn't go over really well, and so basically we shared the room in Amsterdam for the remaining 2 nights, and from then on, no see, no speak. And to stay with the traveling alone theme, I changed my airline seat on the way home Anyway...my final thoughts is that it's ok to try to travel with someone new. It's ok as long as you have in your mind an alternate plan that you can be happy with. I was happy with my plan overall. Travelling with a friend or partner is far more ideal, but in the end, if the trade off to travelling alone is not travelling at all...I say go for it! Take risks! And live!
Apr 6th, 2006, 12:34 AM
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Tamara, sorry to hear the travel partner didn't work out, but I'm glad to hear you made a quick executive decision and salvaged your trip! Did you have to cancel and rebook your hotel reservations on the fly?
Apr 6th, 2006, 08:21 AM
#96
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Will, we still kept the room in Amsterdam. Which was a bit awkward since we seriously said about two words in the next few days. There wasn't rudeness or slamming of doors, just awkwardness. Especially when I would come to the room in the afternoon to use the bathroom or change or something, and he'd be asleep.
The B&B in Bruges was already booked, was adorable, very big and clean, and included a great breakast (including made to order eggs or omelettes); and she lowered my rate to 45EUR a night, which is not horrible, so I kept that one. My hotel in Antwerp had been paid for already, so I just kept it. It was the one that was a rip off. But, by American standards, it was still a good deal at $72. I did book new rooms for Brussels and my last nights in Amsterdam. No cancellation fees, just more spent on hotels than planned.
The B&B in Bruges was already booked, was adorable, very big and clean, and included a great breakast (including made to order eggs or omelettes); and she lowered my rate to 45EUR a night, which is not horrible, so I kept that one. My hotel in Antwerp had been paid for already, so I just kept it. It was the one that was a rip off. But, by American standards, it was still a good deal at $72. I did book new rooms for Brussels and my last nights in Amsterdam. No cancellation fees, just more spent on hotels than planned.
Apr 6th, 2006, 08:25 AM
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Sorry to hear things didn't work out.
I think that is why so many people were trying to give you advice...because they have been through similar situations. People weren't trying to be negative, just being realistic.
I hope your next trip is better and you have more fun! Maybe you will meet a cool guy in a different country!! Yay!
I think that is why so many people were trying to give you advice...because they have been through similar situations. People weren't trying to be negative, just being realistic.
I hope your next trip is better and you have more fun!
Maybe you will meet a cool guy in a different country!! Yay!
Apr 6th, 2006, 08:42 AM
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I do know that this thread has a LONG past life but just had 1 question...
Where does it say when you travel "with" someone you must spend every waking hour together...even to the point of doing things YOU don't want to do?
Why couldn't you have just gotten up in AM, gone and did your thing, and perhaps meet for dinner?
Did you PLAN to spend all the time together?
Personally I travel with small groups or 1/2 other person(s). We each have our list of what we want to do..if all want to do same thing...fine..otherwise you go do your own thing. Sometimes we are together all day and sometimes just for dinner. I think the different perspectives on their "day" is very good dinner conversation and refreshing.
I guess it is a matter of EXPECTATIONS.
Glad you were able to go to Plan B!
Where does it say when you travel "with" someone you must spend every waking hour together...even to the point of doing things YOU don't want to do?
Why couldn't you have just gotten up in AM, gone and did your thing, and perhaps meet for dinner?
Did you PLAN to spend all the time together?
Personally I travel with small groups or 1/2 other person(s). We each have our list of what we want to do..if all want to do same thing...fine..otherwise you go do your own thing. Sometimes we are together all day and sometimes just for dinner. I think the different perspectives on their "day" is very good dinner conversation and refreshing.
I guess it is a matter of EXPECTATIONS.
Glad you were able to go to Plan B!
Apr 6th, 2006, 08:50 AM
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I'm sorry that your travel partner was a disappointment, but really impressed by your spirit. Congratulations for recognizing the problems immediately and moving forward with your trip. There are some who would stay in a bad situation and allow it to spoil the adventure!
Apr 6th, 2006, 10:54 AM
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Hmm, either Americans are really a lot more stuffy than Europeans, or it is a generation factor (I am late flower-power, lol) but I have traveled with plenty of strangers of both sexes, various nationalities, some whose language I did not know at all... I even went on my honeymoon with the best man -- hubby could not join until later -- and no, i would not say, all those experiences have been unproblematic, but it all depends how flexible you are, how flexible your travel partners, how strong, fit and determined to protect your rights to choose and to say "no" (since there is somehow never a problem to protect your right to say "yes"
, no matter what the expectations or excuses or the travel partner. Flexibility: sometimes I have agreed to see/experience something I did not think would be interesting and often ahd a very nice surprise, while at other times I yawned. I believe my travel partners were equally flexible with equal - pleasant or unpleasant - results. For example: I love to snorkel for hours and since it is unsafe ro do so alone, some travel partner will usually oblige and stick around for half a day ... and then I will go as a guide or a translator to some event I don't like, like bull fighting or any other spectator sport. Laissez faires...
, no matter what the expectations or excuses or the travel partner. Flexibility: sometimes I have agreed to see/experience something I did not think would be interesting and often ahd a very nice surprise, while at other times I yawned. I believe my travel partners were equally flexible with equal - pleasant or unpleasant - results. For example: I love to snorkel for hours and since it is unsafe ro do so alone, some travel partner will usually oblige and stick around for half a day ... and then I will go as a guide or a translator to some event I don't like, like bull fighting or any other spectator sport. Laissez faires...
