God Save The Queen
#1
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God Save The Queen
London, 8th November 2000. <BR> <BR>To the citizens of the United States of America, <BR> <BR>Following your failure to elect a President of the <BR>USA to govern yourselves and, by extension, the free world, we <BR>hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence. <BR> <BR>Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume <BR>a monarch's duties over all states, commonwealths and other <BR>territories. <BR> <BR>To aid in the transition to a British Crown <BR>Dependency, please comply <BR>with the following acts: <BR> <BR>1. Look up "revoke" in a dictionary <BR>2. Learn at least the first 4 lines of "God save the <BR>Queen" <BR>3. Start referring to "soccer" as football <BR>4. Declare war on Quebec <BR> <BR>Tax collectors from Her Majesty's Government will be <BR>with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all revenues due <BR>(backdated to 1776). <BR>
#5
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Like, I looked up "revoke" and it was, like, Indian giving, right? So I go, yeah, well I get THAT, but what's this "revocation"? And I'm thinkin, a Queen? I mean, we already got a Prince and he's bad enough. <BR> <BR>Spice Girl, honey, your Elizabeth's a trip, knowwhaddimene? Now, if Di was still walkin' maybe then, okay? <BR> <BR>And NO WAY your gonna get me to say Mia Hamm and Brandy Chastain play football! Never be down with that, isn gonna happen, girlfriend, no no no. <BR> <BR>But don't worry we won't have a president. We're just showing you hotshitte Brits how your supposed to settle things, down-home style. I promise somebody will be prez in January and somebody else will be filling lawsuits like we got a lot of out of work lawyers! <BR> <BR>What's Quebec? <BR> <BR>
#6
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Spice Girl <BR> <BR>You've missed the plot - we're going to become the 51st State when William (Stuff The Euro) Hague wins the next election. Can we have the Jimi Hendrix version of the new National Anthem, please? Now That's What I Call Music. <BR> <BR>I don't think George W and Little Willie have told anyone what's happening to Queenie. <BR> <BR>PS I have a neat solution to the Floridian conundrum - a rotating presidency. Toss a coin for who goes first, then it's two years Bush/Liebermann, two years Gore/Cheney (or vice versa, see coin for details). That'll work ...
#9
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I probably could abide ER, but that doofus son of hers is another matter. <BR> <BR>The vision of ER riding in an open car through East Los Angeles, queen-waving to the crowds, is amusing. <BR> <BR>Wouldn't it be sort of fun to just dump all our problems in her lap. "here you go, your royal self, you can fix the crime, the homelessness, racial tensions..." 'cause she's done such a darn good job throughout her kingdom.
#13
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Ya know, I think Spice Girl is right. We could use a little British "rule." I mean, look at what a fine job the Brits are doing in Ireland! The only problem I might have with surrendering to England is that we'd have to adopt their form of dental hygiene (which, from what I can tell, is defined as "none."
#16
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Seriously, why would England want us back? We would just cause more trouble now than we did in 1776! Giving them any one of several cities I can name would more than revenge the War of 1812. <BR>The idea of digging a tunnel to the USA reminds me of the British force that tried to cut its way through the woods from Canada to New York City during the Revolutionary War. Real sneak attack!!
#17
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Dudes, I totally think Her Royal Highness and her entire family would fit right in California... We can lease them Barbara Streisand's big hilltop estate, then they could be neighbors with Brad and Jennifer and the Hanks and Speilbegs... We could add their residence to the maps of stars homes and get their feet in cement at Mann's Chinese. Hey, it's all about marketing isn't it? I am sure they'd all love the weather.. but try to find good muesli now there is a dilemma... I say come on over Windsor's et al.. You'll fit right in! Maybe they can make it in time to be Grand Marshall at the Rose Parade.