Feeling Guilty About Trip?

Jan 5th, 2009, 06:55 AM
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 12,886
I feel no guilt. I've been taking overseas trips, annually, since 1973, back in my freshman-university days, and this isn't the first recession that I've lived through.

Bottom line, life is short and tomorrow isn't promised to anyone. And I'm not totally planning my life around a recession if I don't have to.

So, my philosophy is that if one can budget in a trip without going without food, housing, and taking care of one's other financial obligations, then take the trip. Personally, I just came back from Buenos Aires a week ago. Instead of my normal 3-week vacation, at this time of the year, I took an 8-day vacation. But, it sure the heck was better than staying at home. I had a ball.

If it's going to be a financial strain, however, then don't take it.

And for those who are trying to dump guilt onto you, just ignore them. They're probably jealous and misery loves company.

My friends travel like I do, so we have no guilt when it comes to travel. We've, of course, had to cut back on our travel expenses like less shopping and sometimes a step or two down in accommodations, but we stayed in "flea bag" hotels all through our university years and most of our 20s and 30s anyhow. So, we can readopt. Smiles. So, go and have fun! Happy Travels!
Guenmai is offline  
Jan 5th, 2009, 07:10 AM
Join Date: May 2004
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Also, these people who try to dump guilt on those who travel have a lot of nerve.

I know folks who say that they wish they could travel, but don't have the money. Well, maybe it's because of the car payment on the BMW, Mercedes, Lexus, etc. Or because they spend all of their money running to Vegas every other month.

I just got a new car, a year ago, after 17 years of driving my old car. I bought a $21,000 car and paid cash and expect to keep it for at least 15 years. A car is a necessity here in L.A., but a super expensive one is not. But, to each his own. I don't down anyone for what he/she purchases, or how he/she spends his/her hard-earned money, as we all have different interests. Happy Travels!
Guenmai is offline  
Jan 5th, 2009, 07:13 AM
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Dancingqueen, if you do not mind a (very) unsolicited opinion , please try to feel that you deserve this wonderful opportunity to share Spain with your daughter. You have nothing to feel guilty about! I felt sad when I read your post. My "little one" lives 3,000 miles away and the trip we took to Italy with him after college graduation continues to be such a treasured memory.

Zwho is completely correct about yada yada yada and there are some things that should not be foregone or regretted or apologized for! Your trip is one of those things. Please do not waste one iota of the enjoyment that you and DD deserve. Buen viaje! I hope you like paella and Spanish tortilla is amazingly delicious, considering what a simple dish it is.
socialworker is offline  
Jan 5th, 2009, 07:21 AM
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If you've got the time and money I don't see why you care what anyone else thinks. Honestly this is one of those life choices that is truly no ones business other than your own.

For lifeofmytimes, if you start traveling solo on a regular basis people get used to the idea (trust me on this one). But I would not sneak out of town, it's good for someone to know where you are when you're traveling abroad & on your own.
suze is offline  
Jan 5th, 2009, 07:25 AM
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Realize that most non-traveling people just do not get the importance of traveling (as far as opinions of others). It's one of those things in life either you got the travel bug or you don't. I don't know why people want fancy cars, homes, furniture, clothes. They don't get why I'd spend my money to go traveling. I'm lucky in coming from a family of "gypsies" where everyone's always moved around a lot and traveled regularly, so they don't find it weird. They'd more be worried if I hadn't taken a big trip in a while!

suze is offline  
Jan 5th, 2009, 07:27 AM
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My son is going to buy me a tracking GPS so that he can follow my solo travels. He worries about me being alone. Many people do not understand the "solo" travel idea. I am just happy to travel alone or with others.
scatcat is offline  
Jan 5th, 2009, 07:49 AM
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Where did you find such a neat cruise? Sounds great!

The very people who will make a remark are those that don't like to travel, or are afraid to leave home, or spend their money on other things.

If they don't understand the extreme joy you find in traveling, then there is no explaining it to them. If you find bargains and watch what you spend while traveling in Europe it isn't that expensive. I just wish that I had started traveling a lot sooner than I did.

Go and enjoy your trip and come home planning the next one.
bratsandbeer is offline  
Jan 5th, 2009, 09:01 AM
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 723
We are having similar thoughts...should we spend the money and go or not? My rationalization is that 2009 is our 50th anniversary and we are still healthy & can get around easily. This is a special trip and I think we should treat ourselves. I don't want to delay and then realize years later that we should have gone when we had the opportunity. I'd rather spend it on us than leave it to an heir. We are generally careful with our expenditures so it's not as if we're tossing money to the wind. I just wish I could get air for less that $2k!
TAW is offline  
Jan 5th, 2009, 09:42 AM
Original Poster
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NO ONE is making me feel guilty. It's in my head. I know I'm lucky and don't want to flaunt my luck, or make someone feel badly or even worse, jealous. I'm good at finding deals and travel is so important to me. I'm probably transferring my feelings onto my friends, when they could care less! I'm like that with stuff they spend their $$ on that isn't important to me. The cruise I found is on Royal Carribbean.
zwho is offline  
Jan 5th, 2009, 09:44 AM
Join Date: May 2003
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Do not feel guilty!!!!

I am a very frugal person. I don't like jewelry all that much, I don't want a fancy car or fur coat, I am not a big spender. BUT, I love to go places and see new things. I really love to travel and would like to do more of it.
We have traveled many places on points for air tickets and points for hotels. My DH is not as much of a travel buff as I am, but has loved all of our trips.

I am concerned about the times. My DH's good friend at work was just let go. So, it does scare me what tomorrow will bring. Since DH had a heart attack this year, I haven't planned any trips. I am hoping to plan something for the summer. It is hard to not be planning like crazy. It is what I dream about.

Anyway, I say go for it and don't look back. Other people live beyond their means every day and are jealous of your travels. They just don't understand the need to see new things or lay on a beach once in awhile! I think it is a very important part of life.
girlonthego is offline  
Jan 5th, 2009, 10:27 AM
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Posts: 328
I do not feel guilty about traveling. We all make choices of how to spend our money, and my husband and I choose to be very selective and careful about spending money. Our income, thank goodness, has not gone down, so we are not having to cut back.

This year we will have our 40th wedding anniversary and I want to be on a trip to celebrate the occasion. We need to make some decisions soon on where to go. I need to have a hip replacement and I'm thinking we will go on a trip first even though I won't be able to do everything. I will need some down time during the trip because of pain, but we will just move slower and not do marathon days. I find that a break now and then with a nice glass of wine can help relieve pain. When I do have the replacement, my traveling will stop for a while, but I will just have to deal with that.

So we are going to travel while we can and not care what other people think.
Susan33 is offline  
Jan 5th, 2009, 10:35 AM
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Susan, I know this is OT, but why not have the hip replacement first, and then travel? The recuperation time is not that long and you'll be so much better for it. I know 3 people who've had them done in the last couple of years, and they all say they should have done it sooner. P.s. My BIL, who had the procedure last year, traveled to Russia and Turkey this year.
sf7307 is offline  
Jan 5th, 2009, 10:42 AM
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Life is short. My mom passed away when she was fairly young, and although I certainly HOPE to live a long life, that isn't guaranteed. I hate it when I hear people say that they will travel "someday," "when the kids are older," or "after we retire." Unfortunately, no one is guaranteed a "someday."

I'm going NOW! Having said that, I do feel guilty sometimes, but I shouldn't.
siena1 is offline  
Jan 5th, 2009, 10:44 AM
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Zwho - I also read that article about the naycation and I was so disgusted by the idea that I emailed the writer to tell him that people still want to travel and he should not focus on the negative. He responded very nicely saying he'd write something positive next time.

Now, I posted a question similar to yours a few weeks ago and the overwhelming response was to GO to hell with feeling guilty or anything else. If you still can't manage it, you could always tell people you won a sweepstakes prize!
sheri_lp is offline  
Jan 5th, 2009, 10:47 AM
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Sorry, I just assumed you were catching 'attitude' from family and friends when you posted... "So why do I feel so guilty telling family & friends we're going?" I didn't realize that they weren't saying anything negative, that you were making it all up (lol).

suze is offline  
Jan 5th, 2009, 11:07 AM
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Life is too short...GO! It's only money.

Go while you can still walk.
luv2fly is offline  
Jan 5th, 2009, 12:30 PM
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 285
I don't feel guilty. I love to travel. It's my passion. I don't live extravagantly because I'd rather spend my money traveling. I don't need to justify to anyone what I spend my money on.

Is the economy bad? Sure. But I'm not going to be so scared that I stop doing the one thing I love to do.

I still save for retirement. I have emergency savings. I have long term savings. I'm not in debt except for my mortgage. I put aside money in my trip fund and when I've saved enough money I go.

Susan33-please consider going after the hip replacement. My dad had hip replacements and although he gets around slower, he said the relief from the pain was incredible. You might enjoy the trip more, pain free albeit slower.
whoknew is offline  
Jan 5th, 2009, 02:13 PM
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 8,586
I don't feel guilty about traveling, either. Even my husband, who can be quite frugal, and is a bit freaked out by the paper loss of our stocks, has no qualms about us paying to take 3 family vacations next year.

We can only travel with our teenagers now - they won't be teenagers in 10 years. Some of our best times as a family have been on our vacations.

My friends and family are used to hearing about us going away, so no one really makes comments. But, truthfully, it wouldn't bother me at all if they did.
karens is offline  
Jan 5th, 2009, 03:17 PM
Join Date: Mar 2007
Posts: 37
My sentiments are that you travel while you can. We've been to France and Italy 5 times since 2003, and although we have had to cancel our much anticipated trip this August/September to France(the economy), we'll plan for next year. Since we're basically retired,we've taken a big hit with the market. If I could go, I would, but, unfortunately, reality is, what it is. Hopefully, next year, we're going for it. I'd give up almost anything else, to travel. I think most on this board feel the same. As for other people, and what they say, let them keep guessing how you do it, it's none of their business anyway, unless of course, they're paying for it. I wish, we had travelled more, certainly not less!! Have a great trip!!
MaggieT is offline  
Jan 5th, 2009, 03:31 PM
Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 14,440
My only guilt is regarding the limited resources I am using. But I don't use very many at home, where I spent the majority of my time.

I think it's a good idea not to broadcast trips or other extravagant expenditures when in the company of others who could never afford whatever it is you are talking about.

Happy guilt-free travels to you all.
atravelynn is offline  

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