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Does a wedding ring reduce harassment? (Italy, etc.)

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Nov 15th, 2004, 08:58 AM
  #1
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Does a wedding ring reduce harassment? (Italy, etc.)

I know this question might open the field for the jokers, but I'll take the risk anyway.

Does wearing a wedding risk reduce the risk of harassment or propositions in Italy or anywhere else for that matter?
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Nov 15th, 2004, 09:04 AM
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I've not experienced this and not seen this to be a common problem for others, but if someone is going to harrass you, it's not likely that he will be looking at your hands.
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Nov 15th, 2004, 09:09 AM
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From what I've heard, it encourages it !
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Nov 15th, 2004, 09:30 AM
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If you are wearing a wedding ring but your husband is not travelling with you, then the ring means nothing to anyone inclined to harass you. I have found this to be true in many countries, including the US. In terms of harassment, I thought Istanbul was far worse than any part of Italy, or any other country I've ever been to.
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Nov 15th, 2004, 09:32 AM
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From personal experience -- while traveling I've been approached more after I was married and wearing the wedding ring than before I was married. Go figure. A polite no thank you and than going back to what you were doing (reading, eatting, etc) while politely ignoring the attention has usually worked for me. (but keep in mind that I've traveled all around the US, Canada, & the Caribbean -- I can't speak for other areas)
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Nov 15th, 2004, 09:54 AM
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I think you may be overintellectualizing this problem - unless by harasment you mean a little ogling - or a smile and a comment. (A pinch on a crowded bus is always a possibility - a good reason to avoid crowded buses - but this is possible anywhere in the world - and a good stamp on the offenders foot or an elbow in the ribs works just as well as it would in NYC I'm sure.)

Anything beyond that is extremely rare - and certainly men don;t wander down the street propositioning random women - unless you have indicated some definite interest in them.
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Nov 15th, 2004, 10:07 AM
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The myth that Italian men have nothing better to do than "harass" or proposition North American woman is just that: a myth.

I really do wish that the myth were not constantly perpetuated in forums such as this one. Everyone reads the question; very few bother to read the replies that are almost unanimous in stating that the problem is a fictitious one.
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Nov 15th, 2004, 10:11 AM
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Boy, I must be doing something wrong! I don't get harrassed. Maybe flirted with but what's so bad about that?
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Nov 15th, 2004, 10:14 AM
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I wear a big shiny wedding ring and still get constantly pestered and chased and pursued in Europe by pretty buxom gals.

Then the alarm rings and I wake up to cold reality!
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Nov 15th, 2004, 10:48 AM
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Just treat an advance like you would at home: accept it, ignore it, say no, say va via or hit him on the head with your purse.

Don't worry, they are not all wolves, darn!
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Nov 15th, 2004, 10:57 AM
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I have never been to Italy, but I got so sick of French guys hitting on me in Paris, that I was going to try the fake wedding ring thing on this next trip. But you guys are saying that doesn't help at all?
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Nov 15th, 2004, 11:04 AM
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Are you married? If yes, definitely wear it. As a happily single women I personally would not feel comfortable faking a wedding ring.

On my earliest trips to Mexico I lied in my bad Spanish to guys on the street saying my spouse was back at the hotel, but I stayed in the same neighborhood long enough the locals would later reply... "Funny I haven't seen him"!

And like Grasshopper, I have yet to be harassed in Europe.
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Nov 15th, 2004, 11:06 AM
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Just got back from Italy and the only city I had a problem in was Italy. I am divorced but I heard that I should wear a ring, so I did. However, I found the men in Rome to be very bold. I got my backside smacked while on the pay phone one day and was fondled on the subway. However, the men are beautiful so.......
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Nov 15th, 2004, 11:11 AM
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I am definitely happy single woman - and that's the exact point. I am not looking for a relationship, and casual flirting based on nothing but appearance bothers me, so I was thinking, whatever will cut down on guys talking to me like some sort of object is good. (I wore a ring on my left hand this summer working at the ice cream shop, because I worked by myself and I was sick of customers hanging around and flirting with me, especially the married men)
But, if it doesn't work in Europe, then I won't bother.
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Nov 15th, 2004, 11:13 AM
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I haven't ever noticed it reducing the risk of flirty men, in any country!
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Nov 15th, 2004, 11:19 AM
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It helps in Canada. I have a friend who started wearing one to and from work on the busses, and it greatly reduced the amount of guys trying to hit on her
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Nov 15th, 2004, 11:28 AM
  #17
Cassandra
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In my considerable and not entirely happy experience, age is a far more effective deterrent than a wedding band. So just wait a bit, you'll become invisible.

"On the other hand...." you might try wearing a wedding band that has a cross embossed on it, which is what nuns in some orders wear......... ;-)
 
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Nov 15th, 2004, 01:51 PM
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Wedding ring or no wedding ring, doesn't a grown woman know how to handle a man flirting with her?
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Nov 15th, 2004, 01:54 PM
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It is interesting that some women here have few or no problems, and other posters have so much of it (unwanted attention from men)...

For those, I'd suggest thinking about how you present yourself. You can develop an air of disinterest and remain aloof in a way that discourages men without being rude.

It takes two to have a conversation.
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Nov 15th, 2004, 01:59 PM
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Of course I know how to handle flirting - i dealt with it all the time in france. But if a ring will make it so that i don't have to as much, then i'd do it. Whatever make things easier!
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