yogiusd03

Are the people in Paris generally friendly and helpful? I am not sure what to expect on my first visit to France. Any tips and comments would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks

Underhill

Helpful and courteous, yes, but not immediately friendly to the extent that most Americans are; the French are a bit more reserved. But you will find them pleasant and willing to assist you--just don't expect big smiles. It's a cultural thing.

barbmike

I've been to Paris MANY times and have never had a bad experience. My simple reply to you would be that the people in Paris are as friendly to you as you are to them !!! Have a Great Trip !!! Mike

3gigs

Are YOU generally friendly and helpful? If so, that is what you will get in return. There's another post on this site titled Paris Trip Report/The Truth About Paris - please read it in its entirety and forget about the myth of the rude Parisians. Smile at them, speak a few words in their language and be nice. It'll be fine.

StCirq

Are YOU friendly and helpful, and polite and respectful? If so, I'm sure you'll find the Parisians just the same.
Unlike in America, however, they do expect you to engage in some basic niceties, like saying "Bonjour, Madame/Monsieur" upon entering a store or restaurant or hotel, or whatever, followed by the requisite "Merci, Madame/Monsieur" and "Au revoir, Madame/Monsieur."
Learning some basic French phrases will count for a lot. You can do so, if you don't already have a grounding in the language, at www.travlang.com, where you can hear native speakers so your pronounciation will be correct.
If by any chance your impressions of France have already been colored by people who are telling you the French are arrogant and rude, please, dismiss those thoughts from your mind. That is an old, tired myth.

cigalechanta

Another difference, yogi, is here someone goes into a shop and messes up the merchandise, not thinking it a big deal. In paris, You ask to see whatever the item is you are interested in.

SalB

People in Paris are unfailingly polite. If you have a problem, they will go out of their way to help you. You do have to ask for help though. They would not dream of intruding on your privacy to offer help you may not need. If you need help, ask. They're great then.

In restaurants, your waiter will not introduce himself to you as though he was starting a relationship as they do here. Your order will be taken and you will be served with great professionalism. The check will not appear until you ask for it. A French waiter would not dream of interrupting your meal . . . even if you appear finished. You own the table until you ask for a check.

No one will come over to you as soon as you have your mouth full and ask you if everything is all right. It is assumed everything is all right unless you tell them there is a problem. Again, if you have a problem, tell them. They'll take care of it quickly and cheerfully.

This doesn't seem very important, but I've heard a lot of people complain about French service because of this. It is wonderful service, but it is a bit more formal than in the US. (We prefer it.)

Enjoy your trip. Paris is great!

francophile03

I agree, Parisians are friendly. But not like US friendly. The people are reserved but that doesn't mean they are unfriendly; they do not know you enough to open up. As for what SalB says about the differences in Parisian waiters vs. American waiters, it is true. It's so irritating at home to have a waiter become so talkative and friendly knowing it's all pretense. In Paris the waiters are friendly enough but their jobs come first.

cigalechanta

I agree with Sal and you, francophile, I can't stand, "Hi, I'm your waiter, my name is..."

francophile03

Really if you're polite the Parisian waiter (who may also be the owner at a small restaurant) may engage in conversation with you and you'll know it is genuine!

skatterfly

Helpful, yes. Courteous, yes. Unfailingly polite, yes. Pleasant when you're interacting with them, yes. "Friendly" as in overly personal, no. It's a cultural thing. I almost died one time at Bastide D'Odeon travelling with my monster in-laws and my father in law started bragging to our host or waiter (can't remember) about how one of his sons works "in the movie industry." And they're pretty well travelled... they don't usually scream "ugly American." Just made an error in judgement about how chatty the waiter wanted to be. It's easy to do when you're enjoying your trip and someone asks you if everything is going well, or if you're having a nice time. But that poor waiter just stood there and listened attentively but you could tell he couldn't WAIT to get outta there to help his other clients.

Also, you won't find people overtly smiling at you. People just don't wander around the streets with smiles on their faces smiling at strangers just for the sake of doing it. One of the regular posters here says it kind of funny... they'll think you've just been released from a loony bin. I do usually wander the streets of Paris with a smile on my face, because I AM enjoying myself and marvelling at the beauty that I can't see in the states, but I certainly don't take it as rudeness when they don't reciprocate.

That said, the other posters here hit the nail on the head about you being polite and you'll get what you put out. Always say please, thankyou, good morning, good evening, and MUCH better if you can learn these in French.

And, I can't remember if someone specifically mentioned it in this post yet, but you should ALWAYS say "Bonjour, Madame" or "Bonjour, Monsieur" at the start of a conversation. For an inquiry. For ordering your bread at the patisserie. At restaurants, everywhere. They'll greet you this way, too. It's will seem so formal and strange to do it, but it's one of the beautiful things you'll be able to remember about Paris and the French language, even if that's all you can learn.

wondering

st.cirq is very correct. it is considered rude to enter a store, restaurant, etc. without a courteous greeting, bonjour at the least, and leaving without a thank you and a goodbye. these simple courtesies go a long way...

skatterfly

Francophile has a good point, if it's a smaller restaurant or they're not too busy or if they show a genuine interest, they probably are. I thnk the same is true if you go to the same restaurant more than once on the trip and see the same person, or if that person made a recommendation for you that you wanted to tell them about. (I did that once... went back to the restaurant to tell a host that I liked his recommendation for something to do. I peeked inside, he recognized me, we exchanged a quick few sentences, but I could see he was busy and didn't stand there and jabber away. Then I ran into that same guy in the neighborhood as he was preparing the restaurant that day... and we exchanged a polite nod and small smile.

cigalechanta

All good points. What also pleases me is that many times when you enter a restaurant and seated, the next table's patrons will say bonjour to you or if passing on a path, you get a hello.
And I have never run into a nasty dog.

francophile03

My personal experience with the waiter/owner incident occurred while on a tour of all things. It was the Euroscope day tour that included lunch at this surprisingly nice restaurant in the 2nd district, Les Noces de Jeannette. The tour co. messed up with our tour package & tour guide but I remember the owner, this older gentleman, coming over to explain to us the slight problem with the tour guide. He didn't speak fluent English and of course we didn't speak French so it was a few minutes before we understood. Anyway, he patted me on the shoulder to reassure me that it's ok we could just wait at the table until the correct tour guide showed up. That was really nice of him and the restaurant serves very good food too.
Another incident was at Le Bistrot de Paris in the 7th district, the waiter patiently tried to explain the menu offerings to us and was very concerned that we enjoyed the food that we ordered.
I sure haven't come across anything like this at home and these two incidents happened within 5 days in Paris.

skatterfly

Francophile, you've recommended Bistrot de Paris before. Do you know the cross street/location? I'll have to look at your previous posts about it... sounds good and I'm going to check it out when there. With my parents on this trip, they can stay at the apt with the baby and we'll venture out alone within our neighborhood.

That appreciation for the enjoyment of the food is one thing that I have noticed almost everywhere I have gone in both France and Italy... especially from the owners or hosts. I have often found that the more adventurous I am, the more I enjoy the meal, the more some of those people open up more because we have something to connect with them about. Reminds me about a post I saw here today somewhere about a woman at a restaurant who screamed at the server "miss, I did NOT order this amuse bouche and I'm not paying for it." Ugh. Like many have said here, you get what you give out. If you're rude or tacky or impolite, they will be too.

ira

Hi skatterfly,

If you look up Bistrot de Paris at
http://www.voila.fr/PagesJaunes/

You will find

Le Bistrot de Paris
33 r Lille 75007 PARIS
01 42 61 15 84
01 42 61 16 83
fax : 01 49 27 06 09

SuzieC

I have a personal theory on this. I found, Parisians and then French outside of Paris both to be quite polite and reserved, at first. BUT, if they recognize you a second time, they can be very warm and friendly. I need to go back...gotta prove this. Wonder if I can get a grant?

ira

Hi yogi,

Good advice about not handling the merchandise in shops. It's just not done.

Sort of like going into a bakery and picking up the rolls and putting them back.

dcespedes

We visited Paris for the first time last summer and found the people there to be quite helpful--even shared a few smiles over my attempts at speaking French. What a beautiful city--I hope you enjoy a wonderful trip!