kate

If you look at my former posts you'll see I have an agenda to do this research and people questionning my maturity, parenting, decision-making, etc. isn't a deterrent. I will find a number of options to bring to our group's table with or without your help. Sorry I haven't been quick enough to get back online for you today.<BR><BR>What I have done today is to send a personal email to one of the most negative responders to ask what specifically I'm saying that is generating such a stir. I'm happy to ask the same questions of this forum, but since he said that he is college counselor, I'm taking him at his word that he may have some specific insight to offer me. I was waiting his response before I got back on.<BR><BR>You'll also see in previous posts that I'm new to this forum and a never-been traveler to the Caribbean. It's interesting to me that, rather than give constructive guidance (and I thank those who have), so many posters just want to trash me. <BR><BR>So the questions I asked him - and you are free to answer, too, if you can drop the nasty attitude - were:<BR><BR>What specifically am I asking that is generating such responses? Is it that I'd even consider taking girls out of the country for senior spring break? That I initially suggested we might stay at a different resort? That I asked for suggestions of a place where teenagers might have fun (music, beach, dancing, kids their own age) without the common demoninator being alcohol? That I dared to ask if an all-inclusive is the way to go? Or was it that I asked for a variety of responses?<BR><BR>So, I'm still looking for specific ideas in addition to the ones that people have, unjudgingly, provided.<BR><BR>there, are you happy now?

Ronny

Kate, the e-mail address is fake to avoid TONS of spam, so I won't get your e-mail. I wouldn't respond directly anyway. Too creepy. And against internet bulletin board protocol.<BR><BR>That being said, I think the vitriolic responses are a result of the unfortunate wording of your initial inquiry and your tone in follow-up posts. <BR><BR>In my opinion, the international aspect is completely irrelevant (other than the fact that alcohol is much easier to obtain outside the country, as a general rule), and I imagine the others feel the same way. <BR><BR>What IS relevant is that your daughter and her friends will be seniors in high school, some only 17 years old, and you're interested in finding clubs that don't close too early with plenty of boys where alcohol/drugs are not the main attraction. Do you realize how incredibly naive that sounds? I'm still in denial, hoping you're a troll who came here to stir up trouble! <BR><BR>Yes, your CHILD and her friends will be in college soon. Soon enough. Don't rush it and please don't think you're doing them a favor by giving them a "next level of freedom." Childhood is not a test. A tremendous amount of maturation occurs during the senior year, the application process, graduation, and the summer of mental preparation for college. Be patient and be a parent, not a friend. I can't tell you how many failing students I've had in my office who didn't have parents; they have enabling "friends." <BR><BR>Now let's talk a little bit about your tone and defensiveness. You asked, and the mob responded. People who frequent this forum are (generally) very well-traveled and helpful. Clearly your question stirred up much emotion, perhaps because many have seen the error in your ways and attitude. Pardon the cliche, but if you can't stand the heat, stay out of the kitchen. <BR><BR>As I said before, we don't know you. We only know your words & attitude. Apparently that's enough to generate quite a response. Don't take it personally -- I believe the mob has the best interests of the children in mind; I know I do.

HaHaHaHaHa

Ronny,<BR><BR>I'm actually laughing at your reply as I type, and with reservations of bringing this thread down to a new level(sorry about that Kate), I am, just for fun, compelled to respond to your comment regarding Kate's "unfortunately" worded initial post and follow ups. I think that her tone throughout has been quite cordial, non-offensive and very reasonable. <BR><BR>YOUR previous posts, on the other hand seem to expose a deep seated and inflated sense of self importance in your role as a "college counselor" and self-proclaimed expert on high school seniors. Amazingly as it may seem, one cannot judge every high schooler based upon Ronny's personal life experiences and few years of "counseling" troubled college students. I'm assuming they end up at your door because they are students in trouble? Furthermore, your posts were incredibly presumptive of Kate's child (whom, I must point out, you do not know) and were petty to boot. This, sir Ronny, is why i'm laughing. I couldn't resist giving you a little kick in the pants. <BR><BR>One more thing, I can tell you that I went to Cancun when I was 18 while a college sophomore and there was all that stuff people are talking about above going on around me, but I acted responsibly and chose to abstain. Ever think that some kids are responsible like that? It surprises me because it seems that you have such little faith and trust in the people you are supposedly trying to counsel. Perhaps a few of them have proven that they're worthy of some trust, yet you still deny that? How effective can you be as a counseler as a result?<BR><BR>So, anyways, that's why i'm laughing. <BR><BR>Oh, and i'm not a troll, nor am I kate. I'm an honest to goodness, real, live, laughing woman.

Jill

I think some are you are judging her to harshly. Contrary to popular belief, some teens are good kids. You are judging her parenting and her children w/out knowing them . Look at yourselves. You are being judgemental, and don't we teach children not to do that. And she needs parenting classes?? I remember when I was eighteen, I drank and my parents knew it. I was going to college the next year, I was going to do it anyway. So they didn't wag their finger at me and say I was bad. Nor did I think anything less of them. I'm alot older now and I can say I have no "damaging" effects from it. I actually have always had a great relationship with my parents, from teen-adulthood. She is looking to take her kids for a good time, and I think she is old enough to know what is right and wrong w/out you telling her. Some of you are being dramatic and need to grow up. <BR><BR>By the way... I recommend a cruise.

Kate

Ronny. <BR>I am still in the kitchen, but it's not the heat that's getting to me.... too many cooks spoil the dinner if you know what I mean. I thank you kindly for all of your 'help', but I think I have gleaned all the value I can from your posts. Maybe someone else can benefit from your guidance; our time is up<BR><BR>Others... thank you. I will continue to be grateful for the posts from the well-traveled and helpful.

You Go Ronny!

This thread is a spent pile of garbage ("garbage in, garbage out"), but I can't help but comment to utter morons like the spineless HaHaHaHa and earth mother Kate. <BR><BR>You, Kate, are every kid's dream. Just keep on doin' what you're doin'. I'm sure your kid is the exception to the rule and would never, no never take advantage of you. Rock on. <BR><BR>Kids have been sooooo much better off the past 20 years, haven't they? The problems have just seemed to disappear. No worries. Thank God for parents like Kate! If only there were more like her, Wow! <BR><BR>Oh, and I have a suggestion: How about Mardi Gras next year as well? I hear there are some nifty clubs in New Orleans that are open 24/7 and would welcome a pack of 17 year chicks. Talk about all-inclusive.

Eric

Why are people so much ruder on this site than anyone I ever actually encounter. This poor woman asked a simple question, to which myself and others politely responded. Unfortunately, others have decided to lower themselves to insulting her, her kids, and her parenting skills. Is it email that makes people so much more rude than they would ever be in person ? Does the faceless communication that is email actually bring out the worst in people. I'm sure that most of the individuals that responded to this post would have been far more polite if they actually met this woman, and she asked the same question (in person)...<BR><BR>Lighten up folks ! It seems that the travelers that love the Caribbean might be a little more "laid back". Instead, many are painting themselves as anal, overly critical, and rude.<BR><BR>Eric

Terrence

Eric, you want rude? Okay, here goes: You are an idiot. Of course people are different via e-mail, as they are when they're safely behind the wheel of their car. But I guess you never say anything rude in traffic that you wouldn't say to someone's face. You stupid hypocritical moron! The Bad Mother Kate asked a superbly naive question that's a sad commentary on the state of today's young people. I think she got what she deserved, and nobody is holding a gun to her head forcing her to read the responses. Hell, you even went after her (DUH!). Get with the program, Eric, the internet is the wild west and only the strong survive. <BR><BR>

Robert

Terrance,<BR><BR>Forget your meds today ??<BR><BR>Robert

ac

I jsut got back from the perfect place for your plan. We had a ball 3 ladies and a 14yr. old (who we kept close tabs on by the way). All young girls get LOTS of attention. P.s She looked 18.<BR>We stayed at Dominicus Palace, La Romana, In Dominican Republic. The beauty of this place - 2 hotels on one massive outstandingly beautiful property. To walk from the border of one to the other is approx 20 mins. (It may be more I did not walk it.) We stayed at the Dominicus PALACE. It is a little quiter. The girls could stay at the Dominicus GARDENS. Our room was facing beach and closer to the GARDENS and it still took us 10 min to walk over there to try their buffet lunch. There is nightly entertainment at both. BUT the GARDENS has more and has more young people staying there. The staff were great. Especially the 'Animation' (entertainment). They are multi talented and work from morn. to night ad still smile and are so friendly especially Niko, Saulo and Marko. Can't say enough about this place for young and old. It is safe too. Go to Vivaresorts.com and click Dominican Rep. Let me know if you need more info.

Beth

I've got a suggestion. For their next spring break, after they're all 18 years old and ready for that NEXT level of freedom, you can all go to Hedonism II in Jamaica! Wouldn't that be splendid, and I'm sure an important learning experience. Pack your penicillin and away you go!!!!

Kate

Message to ac<BR><BR>Thanks for your suggestion of the Dominican. My brother lived there for several months doing research for his Ph.D. I will talk to him and check into this further. <BR><BR>I'm also looking at Puerto Vallerta since a group of our friends just returned from there and seemed to have found the sort of place we're looking for. They and their 6 'daughters for a week' had a wonderful time. Anyone have first hand experience?<BR><BR>

x

Kate.....you have a poor attitutde!