Part I
My husband and I are in the process of trying to book flights to Vietnam to visit his family in Saigon. He has been back twice before but never really travelled to any other parts of the country. I have never been there and would like to see some other citie. It would hurt his family if we left Saigon while we were there to travel without inviting all of them to go with us (20+ cousins, nieces, nephews, etc.). Is it possible to coordinate a trip that would allow us to fly to Hanoi and then work our way south when we would only have less than a week. In that way his family would not know that we had visited other places without them. I know this probably sounds terrible but it would be financially impossible for us to pay for all of his relatives to go with us. Any suggestions would be most welcome.

Part II - My husband's family is, as I said, very large and I want to spend as much time with them as possible but they have a small home without air-conditioning. While I know that going to Vietnam means hot/humid days but I would really need the air at the end of the day. My husband and I thought it would be good if we could find a house to rent where we (with his whole family) could have our reunion and where we could all congregate (and cook) and also have some of the immenities that his family cannot provide (i.e. air-conditioning). Does anyone know if this is possible?? Obviously, translation isn't an issue for us wherever we are,but because my husband has never stayed anywhere but with his family, he doesn't have a clue either.

Sorry for the verbosity - just wanted to give you a clear picture of my situation. Thanks so much!

While not ideal, you can get from Hanoi to Saigon in less than a week and still see something. Start in Hanoi, spend two nights there, fly to Danang, visit the Cham Museum there but don't stay the night in Danang, nothing else there. Instead, rent a car and driver and go to Hoi An for a couple of nights, then drive through the Marble Mountains to Hue and spend a night or two there. Then, fly to Saigon. In 6 nights, you will have had an introduction to Vietnam and still see what is there. I did this in not much more time than what I've outlined here and didn't feel rushed.

Alternatively, you could skip either Hoi An or Hue and stay more time in Hanoi but if it were me, I would not skip either one, especially if you don't think you'll be back anytime soon. It depends on what you want, see as much as possible, or concentrate on just two areas. Alot of people on this board will say to go to just one or two places but I disagree. Some people don't mind moving around and are happy with just a couple of nights in a place. Only you know what you would want, go with that.

I know nothing about renting a house in Vietnam but here's a couple of websites that may be of help:

http://www.livinginvietnam.com/US_Ve...in-vietnam.htm

http://www.vietnamwebsite.net/portal/links.php?cat=50

why on earth would you think the famaly would say anything if you travel around without them. I willl not say too much since I don't know your situation but just plan your husbands and your trip too please each other..

Thank you laurieco for your suggestions AND for the websites. I will check them out right away. To Orgy7, I may be wrong but I'm guessing you are not too familiar with Vietnamese and/or Asian culture. The needs/wants of the family are paramount to the needs of the individual. I respect that and, while they wouldn't "say" anything - they would be hurt and I don't want to do that as I'm meeting them for the first (and probably last)time. Thank You again.

I can't comment on Vietnames culture but from an Asian perspective don't think it's the case that you would need to bring the whole clan along on your holiday. I feel that it's sufficient to treat them for a few meals within Saigon itself.

Nonetheless your husband would know best.

united has the only direct US flight to VN i believe...from the west coast...you can check it out...just fly into saigon and fly right north on VN airlines without even staying one day in saigon....then work you way south....

make sure they don't come to the airport to meet you on your 2nd arrival...have them come to your hotel or take a taxi to one of their houses...

Phameous. I'v actually been living in thailand for 3 years now and have had lots of experience with thai/Asian famalies. I'm also Latino and know about realy tight famaly bonds.

Anyways I'd say your best bet is too help set up a big party for the whole famaly.. but I get the feeling your husband already knows all this.

acutully a better option is two rent 2-3 mini vans and go too a local park, waterfalls what ever and have a famaly picnic. bring lots of beer and wiskey..

I dought most of the famaly would evne be able too travel around the country unless no one works.

Im actually more curious of what your husband is telling you?

I'm coming up to roughly 14 years veteratan in Thailand.
I understand where you are coming from but my humble opinion is do not try that ideas of traveling and then keeping it a big 'secret'.

You are traveling to Vietnam, you plan to fly into Hanoi and visit places and 'then' visit the family in Saigon/HCMC, simple, nothing to hide, it's a total non-issue.

Now, that is far more easy than would would "really' cause and upset is to do the north and then not tell them and risk them finding out, some slip up, baggage tag, anything at all, and it is unnecessary anyway.

I agree a day out picnic/family trip is suitable, dinner etc to a park or some special local place.

When you arrive you arrive as a 'guest' but you leave as family!

Thank you all for your advice; it's been interesting to get so many different opinions. My husband and I have discussed this and because he knows how his family would react, he also feels that they would be hurt. Unfortunately, as Viet Kieu (American Vietnamese) they believe he/we have a limitless source of income (despite what we tell them). Therefore, taking this mini-vacation/honeymoon (which we still haven't had after 14 years together) would better be kept under wraps. Neither of us want to keep "secrets" but if are able to afford it, and we do end up going North first,we'll be careful. As far as the other 2.5 weeks, we'll be with them every minute - that's why I suggested we rent a house. That way we can all be comfortable in one big space. We plan to rent a van and take them to different places in the area that they haven't seen,but just not all the way up north where it involves overnights.

My husband's father is 85 and, like him,the rest of the family is also very traditional so bringing the whole family would be the appropriate thing to do - in their opinion. But, time/money will tell how things work out. I know that he/his family will also want to have a big neighborhood party so I'm not going to feel too guilty about spending some time alone before we get there. I don't speak Vietnamese so they'll pretty much have him all to themselves for 2 out of 3 weeks. This isn't set in stone but I'll know more as time goes on. Most of his family is sel-employed so they can pretty much make their own hours it seems.

I'm going to check the prices for United but because I have chronic back problems, we're leaning toward EVA's Evergreen Deluxe class with more seating space which I'm hoping will help keep my back from "going out". Does anyone know of another airline with the add'l. leg/seating space?

Also, I'd be interested in knowing how to get hrough 25+ hrs. of flying time? I'm really worried about getting claustrophobic and, unlike my husband, I can't sleep in a vetical position!
I can read for just so long. Does anyone know if EVA allows laptops? I'll call them to find out but if anyone knows, let me knoww.

Again, thank you all for such good advice. I'm hoping I'm not taking advantage of such a good site! Sue