My husband and I will happen to be in Shanghai at the time we celebrate our 23rd anniversary. We would like to plan a special dinner. The focus would be on good food and an appealing ambiance that favors relaxation and conversation. Wine list is not a factor for us. We like very spicy food and have adventuresome palates. I have been consulting guidebooks and websites, and can continue to do so, but I suspect that someone here will have a fabulous idea for us. Thanks for any suggestions.

Happy Anniversary! Shanghai local cuisine is the furthest from very spicy food, it is prized for its subtle and delicate flavors, more like french than spanish.

Search for Hunan or Szechuan places, don't expect much ambiance unless you get a private room.

i can offer gpanda as a private chef, but not sure of the consequences

Does it have to be Shanghainese cuisine? If yes, I recommend LYNN. It's right around the corner from the Shanghai Centre and the RC. The atmosphere is nice and the food is excellent. Not too formal. Not expensive at all.
99-1 Xikang Road, off Nanjing West Rd.

For other Chinese:

Sichuan Citizen on Donghu Road is also great. Currently my favorite Sichuan restaurant in the city.
30 Donghu Road, near Huaihai Road

Xindalu at the Hyatt on the Bund is great for their roasted Peking Duck. Could finish the evening with drinks at VUE upstairs as well.

Otherwise, for an anniversary dinner my picks might be,

Stiller's
In a newer area south Bund, the view is gorgeous. The food is amazing, so is the service. They have a couple of different tasting menus which I highly recommend.
6F, Building 3, 505 Zhongshan South Rd.

Franck (French) in Ferguson Lane
Fairly tiny place in a leafy area of the French Concession. The chef is Japanese and the food is immaculate.
Ferguson Lane, 376 Wukang Road

Jean Georges on the Bund is always a treat too
Three on the Bund
If you don't want something as formal, next door they have opened Nougatine. Really good as well.

Marya: You might want to look into Fu 1088; it seems to get very good reviews for both food and atmosphere. It offers local food so would not be spicy.

I will try it in March:




http://www.cityweekend.com.cn/shangh...i/has/fu-1088/

Assuming Chef Gpanda is booked for the evening, I am going to dive into researching the other intriguing suggestions above.

Thanks so much. I'll be back with more questions.

me thinks a better idea

Booked? Not at all for a Fodorite. We really liked New Heights at 3 on the Bund. It's fusion cooking, but really interesting. The view across to Pudong is great. Not particularly spicy. Reservations required.

I would strongly suggest that people ignore eating advice from someone who is known to frequent lasagna bars in Shanghai.