My workmates and I have been planning to go to Thailand for about a year now. We’re finally doing it in two months and we’re doing our individual research about the place and the culture in preparation. I saw in one of the blogs I’ve read that vendors in tourist spots can be quite pushy on what they are selling, and that they had a pretty bad experience with them when they went there for an asian matchmaking tour.

How do we turn them down without insulting them or appearing too harsh? The least thing we want to happen is to cause some trouble while in there. What do we do if saying “no thanks” won’t make them back off?

I am (truly) curious -- over the last month or so we've had maybe 10 new members register to ask a question (about Thailand, the Philippines, wherever) and mentioning as totally irrelevant asides, a matchmaking/'romance' tour.

Just seems weird . . .

Nobody can make you buy. The most effective approach, of course, is to not look at the goods and don't slow down. Whether you stop or don't stop, be pleasant, smile, be relaxed and say no thank you, if you feel you must say something. That's all you have to say. If they persist, so what? Smile and be on your way. You are never required to engage.

Avoid eye contact with vendors. They will get the message. But remember that nearly all the vendors have only one way to earn a living and that is selling street items, so naturally the vendor sees every 'farang' (white european type person) as vastly richer and well able to buy.
Plz do not tell me that you are not so rich, compared to street living Thais.

That does sound weird. Are you implying I'm one of those people?

It could, I suppose, be different in Thailand, but elsewhere in Asia I just smile and say "no thank you" in the local language. No problem! Vendors have nothing to lose by asking, they know I have no obligation to buy, and often seem to appreciate being treated as humans deserving of eye contact and a polite response.

Never had a bad experience with street vendors in many visits to Thailand, but then we rarely frequent the usual "tourist spots". However I can imagine someone on a "asian matchmaking tour" may well spend a lot of time in such places.
As kja suggests, it is always polite to learn a few words of the language when visiting a new country.

The basics of Thai are easy to obtain online. No thank you = Mai ao (khrap or kaa) the last two are spoken as "politening syllables" and are added at the end of just about every phrase to make it polite. Thai is a tonal language and so shoes not rely on voice inflection to indicate emotion. In fact changing the tone of the word will change it’s meaning completely. Can lead to a lot of amusement and blank looks or laughter!

Agreed...allI of a sudden the word matchmaker is popping up in posts on several forums re Thailand. Is this some kind of SPAM?

I too have never felt hassled bystreetvendors.
I think it is 50% method and 50% attitude.
if you let yourself get irritated, you've lost the battle.
"Mai ao" roughly translates as "won't have!" Or "not want!" Which is quite aggressive.
a more polite response would be "mai pen rai" - "never mind" "doesn't matter" "no problem".
Remember to put kha or khrap on the end.
Then the conversation is over.
I'm slightly taken aback by my Thai friends who for the most part totally blank these people as if they don't even exist. They don't even hesitate if in conversation.
There is I've noticed an attitude with vendors, waiters and anyone in a menial job to ignore completely except for a few short commands. Something that is a bit surprising to those of us used to a more egalitarian society.

IME, that approach is certainly not unique to Thai people. I'm frequently appalled by this kind of behavior by other people from the U.S. (my country), and that's whether in the U.S. or anywhere else....

"asian matchmaking tour. "

This same phrase or similar phrase seems to be popping up on several travel forums. Hmm, wonder why?? 5 5 5

" vendors in tourist spots can be quite pushy on what they are selling...."

If this is a real question and not part of an advertising pitch - I am not too much bothered by "pushy" vendors! I smile, nod my head mumble no thanks and move on. You are not under any obligation to engage in a long discussion from any touts or street salesmen. In particular, for tuk-tuk drivers who want to talk to you; tuk-tuk show up in several scams over many years. (Also meter taxis are cheaper for most tourists than a tuk-tuk.)

For something I may buy from a street vendor a little banter back and forth is normal. But there is no need to raise your voice or insult the vendor, just say no thanks and move on. Who knows, the vendor may have a good product at a lower price than the next guy you stop at.

Good luck.





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umm, yeah, a newbie first-time poster with a name like polite* asking about being polite does look like a one-and-done spam poster

Doesn't the fact that Thai people use that approach mean that it is a local custom?

I realize that some pushy vendors are just trying to make an honest living. Some are running a scam. They likely don't see me as a human - I am just a possible source of cash for them.

In what culture is it ok and polite for you to interrupt a conversation or block a stranger on the sidewalk or get in their face just to sell something?

I just say "no". Everyone knows what that means.

No! That SOME people use that approach does not make it a local custom.

BTW, the world would -- IMO -- be a better place if everyone really did know what NO means. I think it's unfortunately, but abundantly, clear that not everyone does.

Don't know about Thailand but in India I simply said "no" while I was walking and did not make eye contact, just kept walking. It worked their and I 'll bet it will work inThailand too.

You'd be up against some extremely ingrained cultures where the words "yes" and "no" hardly exist.

try getting a Thai person to say yes or no about anything........ the "cult" of Kreng Jai more or less forbids it.

Not just Thailand, I think.

WRT to the OP, if his friends thought the Thai vendors were pushy they should avoid India!

Very very true about Indian vendors.

Interesting! I wonder if there's a relationship between the ways in which "no" can be meaningfully articulated in a culture and the incidence of what Westerners, at least, might regard as sexual exploitation or rape.