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To Scotland With Love!

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To Scotland With Love!

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Old Nov 25th, 2012, 12:30 PM
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To Scotland With Love!

My handsome man of Scottish descent proposed to me and I said Yes! We wish to marry in Scotland or Ireland, where my family has roots. We are leaning toward Scotland as neither of us have been to Scotland, but both have traveled extensively. The idea of Scotland is most appealing because of the family connection and the ease of travel for the family and friends we shall bring to the event.

We are planning the event for November 2013. Yes, we realize it may be cool, but, we are an hardy lot. Some members may choose to journey on to warmer parts of Europe after Scotland, but, we do desire the UK for our wedding.

We journey to Paris for a break soon and may stop for a short time to start the process of finding the right location, the small village or area that calls to us with an atmosphere of Romance. We thought we would start in Edinburgh!


Appreciated input of:
Beautiful places we must see for a week of travel around Edinburgh.
Is there another area we should consider other than Edinburgh?
A charming small church for our ceremony
Scottish customs unlike those of the States
Small villages where we could host our family members that they may enjoy a walk in the village, auto in the near sites and scenery, short day trips could be taken, castles visited and so on.
Cultural sites
Scenic

We welcome your thoughts and suggestions as we begin our journey to Scotland with Love!

Ginger & Ward
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Old Nov 25th, 2012, 12:39 PM
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Click on my name at the upper right of this page and read my post "Edinburgh in Late October." It was about our trip to attend a Scottish wedding. Our daughter was also married in Scotland to a Scot, so we have some experience.

What we don't know is how easy it would be to come from the US and get married in a church because both these couples already had church connections.

Scottish weddings are generally quite different from American weddings. After you read my post, you may have questions about these differences in detail. The biggest difference is that there is much less emphasis on "your special day" and more on linking family and friends.
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Old Nov 25th, 2012, 12:43 PM
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Congratulations1

You may find this web page helpful for details of marrying in Scotland:http://www.gro-scotland.gov.uk/regsc...-about-it.html
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Old Nov 25th, 2012, 12:45 PM
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Oh and this one- you need a visa to marry in the UK:
http://www.ukba.homeoffice.gov.uk/vi...riage-cp/visa/
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Old Nov 25th, 2012, 01:41 PM
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http://www.eileandonancastle.com/weddings.htm

Beautiful place, god help you with our weather! Bring some wellies.
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Old Nov 25th, 2012, 02:13 PM
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Well my daughter got married on 3rd December 2011 and we had a nice sunny day.
You could always do what lots of foreign couples have been doing for many years and get married at Gretna, which is right on the border between the Scotland and England. For the history behind this have a look at

http://www.gretnagreen.com/

It's next to the main motorway so travel should be straightforward both coming down from Edinburgh or up from N. England. Manchester Airport is reasonably close for arriving by air.
You've got the Southern Uplands/Borders area of Scotland and the Lake District in North West England on your doorstep rather than travelling to the Highlands, especially as the days will be short.
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Old Nov 25th, 2012, 02:55 PM
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Gretna, a very long time ago exploited the difference between Scottish and English laws in the 1700s when English minors could run off to our side of the border and be wed without the consent of their guardians. Fine and all very romantic.

However, it is now probably in the top or bottom, which way you look at it, worst places in Scotland. Somewhere, between Fort Willliam and Livingston on a wet day. The majority of weddings there consist of couples each on their fourth attempt to get it right. The town is dominated by a tatty outlet shopping centre and its only redeeming feature is a half decent chippy.

I would cringe if someone travelled further than 5 miles to get married in Gretna.

Here's another option.

http://www.nts.org.uk/Hire-a-venue/Weddings/
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Old Nov 25th, 2012, 03:06 PM
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DickieG's link has some really excellent options. One thing to worry about IMO is weather/>><i>they may enjoy a walk in the village, auto in the near sites and scenery</i><<

Personally - planning a wedding in the country in Nov would be a brave move. In a city like Edinburgh or Glasgow would be easier to manage and no one would have to drive around the countryside in wintry weather.
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Old Nov 25th, 2012, 05:02 PM
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Rosslyn Chapel might fit the bill as somewhere to marry. It is just south of Edinburgh, but it could be a bit touristy. The Scottish Borders, 50-60 miles south of Edinburgh might be somewhere worth looking at, with small towns and villages, small churches, ruined abbies and castles. Small hotels and B&B's in most places, but very few if any at Hyatt standard, but cosy and friendly none the less. First thing to get before you head over there for a November/December wedding, long white thermals. Hope you find a place that you like.
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Old Nov 25th, 2012, 11:25 PM
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Janisj

I know you love Culzean, I don't but it would make an amazing location for a ceremony. Is there a better view?

I could be wrong but I doubt Rosslyn will do "tourist weddings".
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Old Nov 25th, 2012, 11:29 PM
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Janisj makes a good point about the weather. Bear in mind also that daylight hours are getting very short in November.
http://www.timeanddate.com/worldcloc...omy.html?n=304
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Old Nov 26th, 2012, 04:08 AM
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As you can see from the above, the legal requirements are fairly formidable and must be started and completed months in advance. Ditto finding a church if you don't plan to get married at the registry office.

In addition to the issues of weather and short days, there are other things to think about.

Are you planning a destination wedding where your wedding will be part of a larger travel experience for friends and family or will it be pretty much the two of you and family?

If it is a destination wedding, will your guests be able to get there? How much of their food and lodging will they be expected to pay? How much will you pick up? Scotland is not inexpensive, esp in the cities. One good thing is that the costs of weddings among ordinary folk seem to be split equally between the two families.

If you find and work with a wedding planner, you will learn that some US customs (rehearsal dinners, for example) do not seem to apply. There could be a dutch treat dinner, but if you want to treat your guests to dinner the night before the wedding, fine -- they have spent a lot of money to get there. Maybe a serious cocktail buffet if dinner is too much.

Traditionally, post ceremony events seem to be divided into two tracks: a post wedding meal for family and close friends followed by a ceilidh and/or other dancing for your neighbors, your work buddies, and families with young children. This isn't likely to apply for you. Post wedding dinner: it would be pretty cheesy not to feed people who have come all the way from America, so you need to decide on how many you can afford. Hosts provide wine and champagne for toasts, guests provide their own cocktails and whisky.

At the dance, guests usually get the first drink free to toast the happy couple, then there is a cash bar. Usually there are sandwiches and other things late at night to help sober up the crowd and/or keep them dancing. If all your guests are coming from America, this isn't likely to be an issue unless you are members of the Scottish Country Dance Society or the like.

Finally, because drinking and driving is treated much more seriously there than in the US you need to provide a bus if the wedding is not in the city and on public transportation. Of course, if none of you is local and you are all staying in the same hotel, no problem.

There's lots more and other people's customs are no doubt different, but these are what we have experienced and they are not dissimilar to my parents' wedding in London in 1944 except that no family could attend and there were air raids to worry about.
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Old Nov 26th, 2012, 06:01 AM
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We stayed at this place in Scotland many years ago - it might be a very romantic place to host the party and do the wedding:

http://www.lunga.com/html/lungah.html
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Old Nov 26th, 2012, 06:02 AM
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Here's the root website, sorry http://www.lungahouse.co.uk/
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Old Nov 26th, 2012, 08:10 AM
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Yes -Culzean would be a lovely venue . . . Better in May or June than November IMO.

And Lunga House is fairly remote for a winter time wedding.
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Old Nov 26th, 2012, 08:58 AM
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Scotland is great and the number of scenic areas within a short drive of Edinburgh would fill a sizable list (just start googling and go look at the Fodors info).

That said, why November? If it's the traditional notion of a one-year engagement, that's nice but daft if you're set on a wedding in Scotland. Can you move the wedding to early-mid September?

Scottish weather is unpredictable at the driest and warmest times of the year and November is a complete crapshoot.

What you don't seem to understand is that Edinburgh is further north than any major city in North America (it is even to the north of Edmonton, Canada) so daylight is an issue, especially if you're thinking of doing this over Thanksgiving 2013 (which is later next year - November 28 - than this year). Its latitude is roughly equivalent to Copenhagen, Malmo and Moscow - none of which are synonymous with "bright and mild winter."

Check that time and date website Patrick listed - it shows sunsets at 4:15 and earlier from the second week of November and culminating around 3:45 sunsets by the end of the month. And many, if not most, of the most outstanding sites in Scotland are NORTH of Edinburgh, which means they get dark earlier.
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Old Nov 26th, 2012, 09:39 AM
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True, Lunga is remote for November. But as I recall, it had lots to keep you occupied within the grounds, so no need to venture far. It's the getting there that might be ... challenging
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Old Nov 26th, 2012, 01:32 PM
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I think if I were doing this from the US I'd use a planner. But before you get a church, you'll need a minister. Only a minister can marry you in a church; and our lot tend to be picky. They like you to be Christian and preferably regular attenders.

A few hotels have real chapels/churches in the grounds. That might be worth a shout. Otherwise, I'd pick somewhere you have roots and find somewhere pretty there. In November you definitely want a nice house/hotel with roaring log fires.

I'm thinking

Dunkeld
Gairloch
Kirkcudbright
Callender
Nairn
St Andrews
Comrie

Customs? Not much before the wedding- a stage night and a hen party, but if you have no pals here, probably not.

The fiances are not supposed to see each other on the day of the wedding till they get to the church. The bride wears something old, something new, something borrowed and something blue. She carries flowers. You need two witnesses, traditionallly a Bridesmaid and a Best Man. A lot of men wear kilts at weddings; they can be hired, and the wedding party should all wear the same tartan.

A ring for the husband is optional. The service, unless it's a nuptial mass is usually less than half an hour. There should be music on the way in and music on the way out, plus, probably two hymns.

Leaving the church there's confetti or rice; and a small child hands over a horseshoe. You might like to look up "scramble".

Photos are taken between the service and the reception; guests are usually regaled with fizzy wine whilst waiting for the wedding party to appear.

There is a meal; with speeches; You cut the cake (keeping the bottom layer sealed in a tin to be re-iced for the christening) then a dance. The happy couple start the proceedings with a waltz or a Grand March. Often extra guests just come for the dance. You drink; you dance.

There's usually a little something to eat for supper- sandwiches or stovies. You give little presents (called favours) to the lady guests.

You leave amid much applause and more confetti, often with things hanging off your rear bumper.

That's it!

That's it.
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Old Nov 27th, 2012, 02:51 AM
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Sheila, I am honored that we agree on the wedding. I didn't put in the part about the endless wedding photographs because I didn't want to discourage people from coming. At the wedding last month, the couple hired a couple of exLondon buses and sent us on a tour of Edinburgh to pass the time. Good idea.

Neither of us mentioned a piper, but I can't imagine a Scottish wedding without one.

I wonder if the OP has given up in despair. We haven't heard from her!
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Old Nov 27th, 2012, 03:48 AM
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Sheila, is that a description of your wedding?

Off topic: (Glad to see you posting, I had tried to send a couple of e-mails to you and was hoping all was well.)
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