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Family Vacation to Europe - advice needed

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My husband and I are taking our two children, ages 11 and 12, on a trip to Europe for their first time. We wanted to include them in the decisions as much as possible - my daughter wants to visit Pompeii and my son, London and Berlin. We only have 2 weeks - Aug 15-Aug 31.

I decided to make our flight reservations, as the longer we waited, the more the cost was going up. We are flying into London and out of Naples, Italy. Now that I am plotting our course, I am getting concerned that we are trying to squeeze too much in.

Our original ideas were: London, overnight ferry to Copenhagen, train to Berlin, train thru Switzerland to northern Italy, visit Cinque Terre , Rome, Pompeii, Herculaneum.

I am now trying to narrow it down: London (3 days), overnight ferry to Amsterdam (2 days), overnight train to Switzerland (2 days), Cinque Terre, Rome, Pompeii (one week for all).

I am looking for suggestions on our route - where we should go in Switzerland, where to go/stay in Cinque Terre . . . Also, we are hoping to stay in family hostels, monasteries, or other interesting places - we would love any suggestions.

I am also nervous that we have planned too much. I am wondering if paying the Itinerary Penalty for changing our flight plan might be something to consider . . .
Maybe skipping London all together, and flying into Berlin instead? Making our trip: Germany (Berlin,Munich), Switzerland, Italy? My son is very interested in Berlin because he has become interested in the Berlin Wall - but I am wondering if the city is a good destination and interesting beyond that ... what do you think?

Thank you in advance for any suggestions/advice you can pass along.

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