You've all been so helpful before, I thought I would try this question.

My son and his fiance were both married before so they don't want the typical first time wedding with all the trimmings. They would like to do something special with just parents and a few close friends. They live in Los Angeles and all of the parents live on the East Coast so all location suggestions are welcome. Thanks.

ttt

December 31st is a Tuesday. Since the wedding will be small, it could be almost anywhere, but I'm guessing that it would be easier to get married somewhere in the US then say, a Sandals Resort. The couple won't have to deal with residency requirements and tons of paperwork. I'm guessing that the couple will be content with a civil ceremony instead of a religious one, but it might be impersonal not to have the family minister or rabbi officiating.

Where did your son and future daughter-in-law meet? Possibly at that location or where they had their first date. You could look into Las Vegas, I don't think its as tacky as it sounds.

I think you might want to arrange an afternoon or morning ceremony, only because of the specific date and most restaurants would have New Year's Eve festivities going on in the evening.

Also, you need to take into account that the guests will most likely have to take Monday off to get to the location. This may or may not be a problem for anyone that has year-end work commitments.

Wherever the couple decides to get married, make sure that they have all of their I's dotted and T's crossed. They will need to get a license in the town they get married in and blood tests. I'm guessing that they will also have to bring notarized paperwork proving that they are single. So, whatever town they get married in, make sure that a call is made to the town clerk well in advance to find out what all of the requirements are.

Callaway Gardens, GA - absolutely beautiful - even in winter!! www.callawaygardens.com

Thanks Leslie,

They nixed Las Vegas. They were thinking of a 3-4 day cruise. They don't want any gifts and hope their friends and family could use the gift money towards their own cruise payment.

I was hoping to get some other suggestions. Thanks

Hello, any other suggestions?

Leslie,

excuse my ignorance. Blood tests? Never heard of anything like that. What are they for? HIV tests?

Thanks for filling me in

Europe

Only about a dozen states require a blood test. I think the test is to see if you are genetically incompatible, but I'm not sure.

Blood tests are a requirement to determine whether either the bride or the groom has a venereal disease, eg. syphillis, gonorrhea, etc. I don't know if it is a requirement to have a blood test in all states, but I know that it is a requirement in NY, MA and ME. It may go back to puritanical days to prove whether or not the bride is a virgin, but you can still have premarital sex without having contracted VD. I don't know if this specific blood test checks for HIV.

Myrna, have your son and future daughter in law considered getting married at the town hall where they live, and then having another ceremony onboard the ship or somewhere else? That way they won't have to deal with any of the messy paperwork and legalities.

You do not need a blood test in ME - don't know where you are getting your information from Leslie.

the blood test requirement is to make sure diseases aren't passed to offspring, I think.

In Mass., the test is strictly to determine whether either party has syphillis. If they do, they can't get a license.

Doctors who are filling out the medical certificate are also supposed to discuss AIDS andadvise women to be tested for rubella (AKA German measles, which can cause birth defects if caught early in pregnancy; brides who are found not to be carrying antibodies are advised to be immunized).

Possibly the requirements in Maine have changed, however, when I was married in Portland 7 years ago, I was required to get a blood test.

I have two suggestions:

Try New Orleans. Not anywhere in the French Quarter, but there are many beautiful places for small weddings on St. Charles Street. Also try Dugas House.

The other is the carribbean. St. John is a beautiful place to be married and ceremonies can be simple if that is what they want.

I hope their friends (and family for that matter) are well off. Paying for a cruise is a lot more than I usually spend on a wedding gift.

Married in Portland 2 years ago - didn't need a blood test.

That's a wide open question. I'd start by asking what the interests are of the few attendees. What would their plans be for the few days before and New Years Eve and Day? Is everyone interested in skiing/cold weather activities? Or do you want to head for warmer weather? Are the bride and groom heading off by themselves right away? Is everyone going to stay together to celebrate New Years? Answers to this should start narrowing the options.

Why the blood tests? Initially many states required them to screen for various STDs (sexually transmitted diseases). They need to find out what the requirements are for the locale they will getting married in. We got married in Florida 14 years ago; no blood tests were needed, but we both needed the dates the each of our divorces were finalized.

I have a few comments. I agree with the previous poster to choose a location all people would b einterested in and maybe plan some group activities too. Another coomment on the wedding as I got married at a destination wedding as well. Definitely check into the state where you will marry's requirements. Not only do some require blood tests but there may also be a waiting period as well. Where we got married there is a 48 hour waiting period after arriving in the state and purchasing the maririage license. Many require the 3 days waiting period.

Some suggestions, if skiing if a hobby, look into renting out a small inn or lodge in a ski area so that guests will have something to do. The cruise is a good idea also. What I really like is New Orleans though. You might look into Maison Dupuis who does garden weddings and the catering has a creole New Orleans twist to it too. Then the bride and groom ride off in one of the horse drawn cariages.

Leslie,

excuse my ignorance. Blood tests? Never heard of anything like that. What are they for? HIV tests?

Thanks for filling me in

Europe

FYI, destination weddings are usually sparsely attended, esp. if the family members aren't well off. Also, many folks at that time of year will probably use their vacation time around Xmas to spend time with family. So having a destination wedding anywhere on new Years eve might only draw the very closest family and friends (Which, to me, is perfect) - if they can afford the trip and time.

Also, I would advise never saying anything like "Instead of a gift, I was hoping you would come to the wedding instead." Guests are in no way expected to bring gifts. (Sorry if you already knew that...)